Monday, May 30, 2011

Sometimes it is REALLY hard to tell if your man is your man....

It always fascinates me to see which posts have the highest volume of comments....

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Stealthy thoughts

What IS it about meeting that one person who just re-arranges your world in a matter of weeks?  Don't get me wrong, I don't have any illusions that it will work out and we'll ride off into the sunset together.  There's baggage.  It isn't the entire Louis Vuitton collection that The Man had, but baggage nonetheless. 

I can't stop thinking about him.  It's wrong because I'm with other people doing other things. I just can't....

This weekend was floopy.  I spent part of it in New Jack City for an unexpected departure from my norm; an adventure with a Southern Bedu.  (I usually camp in the North.)  Friday friends dropped by as usual.  Z, you are totally crazy boy and you are my new best friend. I frickin ADORE YOU, playah!!!  I was supposed to go to Media Girl's party and meant to, but people just stopped by and one thing led to another.  I'm sorry girl.  I know I promised to wear a burkini to the pool, but I couldn't find one either...

Yesterday.... yesterday.... more action packed into a 24 hour period than I can remember for a long time.

Southern Bedu left at noon (just sayin that I'm not sayin).  He is SOOOOOOOOO fiiiiiiiiine.  Tall, sexysouka, nice.   I had to be at my favorite seafood restaurant by 2 with Butterfly, Spanx et their menfolk.  I was still shakey from the shinannigans of the night/early morning before, so I walked in with my sunglasses on, not really able to move my head left or right without headache tremors.

[Side note:  Spanx told me about a party she and her husband went to the night before.  They said it was faaaaaaaabulous and wished I had been there.  They had a great time.  Said they didn't know the couple that well, but got the invite and went and had tons of fun.  Guess what... turned out to be the Media Girl's party.  Dayam!  I missed out.]

Corvette Girl is there, 2 tables down,  with her mom and dad.  I say hi.  I have missed her.  She's busy between here and Qatar lately.

So, I sit down, get on the phone with Southern Bedu again ( I wish he had went with us) ... and... what's THAT?  Yo, Spanx... is that who I think it is.  "No.  That's not him..."  Yuh, I think it is (but he's wearing dark sunglasses and I can't tell - looks like a well-worn-version of his previous self).  Bang a quick trip to the bathroom to do the check-out-walk-by on the way back.  Oh snap...

Noooooooo.  He.  Di'INT.....

That was OUR restaurant.  For years we went there together.  The manager, the hostess, the wait staff, the valet parkers - all know us as a couple.  Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Etiquette = you don't bring another woman to you and your woman's favorite/special place.  It is bad form.  WHY would he do that? Want to come look for me/at me?  Ok, I am indifferent, but please do not provoke me.

The Man sat there with dark glasses on the en-tire time.  I stopped at the table to say hi to a luke-warm reception.  Glanced over my shoulder and said hi to him.  Walked back to the table to see a bunch of open jaws.  SMSed Corvette Girl at the other table.  "No he didn't!!!  Where?  Which one?...." 

Later that night, I SMS The Man (provoked, I say) to ask him how he could be so disrespectful to BOTH of us by going there.  He says it was, "by mistake" "at the last minute".  Wallah?  You drove from Abdullah Mubarak to my neighborhood, to take her to our restaurant while on your way to Fahaheel?  Wallah?  Like, were all the other restaurants in Kuwait closed?  No way in the world she could have known or would have agreed to let both of us be gossipped about like that. I wouldn't have done that to her and I know she's not like that, so what is your lame excuse?   You got some cojones boy and my guess is that somehow, someone is going to chop them into tiny bits and serve them to the stray dogs in your area. 

Enough said.  Bad energy be gone.  Stay out of my world.  Shoo shoo shoo.

I had to go to a function last night. Still on a pissed-off-adrenaline-high, The Romanian and I go.  I invited a few very nice people I know.  We had a great time.  I've been re-elected.  All is good.  By the way, I really like the Safir Hotel in Fintas.  Very nice place.  So, we are walking out and walk right into my friend, Jamal's brother.   A bunch of our friends are in the coffee shop... cool.  Small world/Kuwait.

.... and then... and then... and then.... the special ring tone sounds....  ahhhhhhhhhh.... Stealthy.  I actually pull the car over to talk to him.  I can't think about him and drive.  He said he misses me.  I miss him.  He comes over... 

Damn I feel good today!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Rockem Sockem Robots: Kuwait Parliament Throwdown

No ladies and gentlemen, not Korea, but Kuwait.

... and there he is:  my "favorite" long-bearded lawmaker, throwing punches; and revealing his "love" towards fellow Muslims and Kuwaiti brethern in Parliament.  Such a decent, pious, righteous man.  Yes indeed.  All that testosterone and righteous indignation. 

Gotta love a good parilamentary hootinany. 

Welcome to the WWF!


KUWAIT (Reuters) - A fistfight erupted in Kuwait's parliament on Wednesday when Sunni Islamist lawmakers exchanged blows with a Shi'ite parliamentarian who labelled Kuwaitis detained in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba as terrorists, lawmakers said.

Shi'ite pro-government lawmaker Hussein al-Qallaf made the remarks during a discussion about the fate of Kuwaitis held at the U.S. military facility, enraging Salafist opposition lawmakers who adhere to a strict interpretation of Islam.

The Salafist lawmakers attacked him, sparking a brawl when other parliamentarians rushed to defend Qallaf, lawmakers said. 

The fight appeared to play out along sectarian lines in a parliament that has seen some tensions emerge between Sunni and Shi'ite lawmakers after Kuwait sent naval forces to Bahrain following Shi'ite-led protests in the Gulf Arab neighbour.

"A Kuwaiti from any sect can make mistakes, but the government and the country should provide him with a fair trial," Salafist lawmaker Waleed al-Tabtabae told reporters.

"This is a national issue, but unfortunately Qallaf wanted to break national unity and started calling them (Guantanamo detainees) terrorists and members of al Qaeda," he said.

Fellow Shi'ite lawmaker Adnan al-Mutawa defended Qallaf.

"Parliament members are free to express their views in parliament, and they should be respected," he said. "Whoever violates others for their points of views is far away from freedom and democracy."

Al Arabiya television said seven lawmakers were involved in the fight. The session was then adjourned to May 31.

"The parliament has never witnessed such an incident since it was established... This is an improper act and does not represent the parliament, nor the good relationship between us," parliament speaker Jassim al-Kharafi said, according to state news agency KUNA.

Kuwait's foreign minister said last year that the United States and Kuwait were working out differences over returning two Kuwaiti detainees being held at the U.S. military prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

Shi'ites make up about a third of the 1.15 million Kuwaitis.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

My hissy fit about the Sultan Center

I couldn't take it anymore.  Sultan Center has gone from bad to worst.  Going to the co-ops is so much better these days.

So I'm in there looking for 2 necessary items.  Can't find them. Almost the entire section where dog items once was - has disappeared.  So, I ask the customer service desk person.  She has a lot of excuses. No solutions.  No idea when items will be in.  She walks away without offering to call another store.

Oh no she di'int.

I ask for the duty manager.  He comes down.  Tells me that the problem is "the Baladia" (huh??), then switches lanes and says it is because of the fire in the warehouse - that they don't have enough storage space to accommodate stocks.  Blah blah blah hachi hachi hachi.  

Why do I bother?  Why do I do this to myself when I know it will never ever make a difference and I wil never ever get a statement that resembles a soltuion??

Has anyone noticed that the little cardboard stands of the store managers (which hold their business cards) are no longer placed at the doors?  Even cardboard managers are disappearing.

WTF is going on at TSC???  When the F are you going to get the basic stuff back???  Inquiring minds want to know - and quite a few people I know have been talking about it.

My personal theory/hypothesis goes a little some'in like this:  The Sultan Center's usual AMERICAN distributors have either dropped them or have in some way/shape/form decided not to provide the discounts that they were offering (when TSC had a deal going through Agility to provide food to the US troops in Iraq).  The discounts were, by the by, the reason why Agility's contracts with the US government folded.  The discounts were not passed along to the military. Bada bing - bad boys get in trouble.   (As a side note:  Have you ever seen a discount in TSC?  Are any of the items priced LOWER than US price?  I laugh.  They are a LOT more.)
Distributors never like to have their names associated with anything tawdry, now do they?  Just bad for business.  Perhapsee the American distributors who were once sending shitloads of food and other commodities to TSC during the past few years just aren't going to do it anymore.  Could it be?  Say it aint so. 

So here is my question, when is another AMERICAN food chain going to come into Kuwait to compete with these guys? Sultan Center has pretty good competition from the likes of Lulu Hypermarket (Indian/local flavah with the best produce in Kuwait), Carrefours (purty good French stuff), Geant (again, purty good French/European).  I say - if US chains like Giant, Safeway, Harris Teeters or (please please please) Wholefoods are having trouble with the US economy:  Bring em to Kuwait!!! 

At the moment, shopping at the co-ops is a much pleasanter experience (in my opinion) than TSC.  At least there, you don't EXPECT to find what you are looking for.

Shaya dudes - are you listening? Why not take one of the junior Shayas and make him into the green grocer?  I would get behind that.  Your customer service is great.  Your management methodology is great.  I would drop TSC like a hot box of rocks...  You could even do what TSC has failed to take advantage of:  Online grocery shopping and delivery....

Thunder/lightening Storm on a Full Moon

Last night was really special.  I love thunder/lightening storms.  They make me laugh.  Always have.  Don't know why. Mark has a video posted aobut it.  I didnt' think it was that thrilling to re-post, but you can check yourself for Kuwait thunderstorm May 2011.  There are a few (not very thrilling) clips out there.

I have never seen so much lightening in Kuwait since I have been here (96).  It was awesome.  Scared the bejezus out of poor little Desert Dawg.  She ended up blowing chunks all over my white wool shag carpet.  Not nice.

Mark sayeth:

Update: Here are the stats from tonight’s storm according to KuwaitStorm
Today’s Strikes
Current “7:18PM” strike-rate 57/minute
Peak strike-rate 511/minute
Total recorded strikes 39617
I have told a few people lately that God would strike them. Maybe He was looking.... just sayin.

Thursday, May 12, 2011


So this week, I didn't see Stealth as much as last week.  Do you think maybe the puking made him run? LOOL.  Honestly, I don't think so.  If he was going to run, he would have left that night, but he didn't.  Even though he felt sick for 2 days because he was also feeling bad that night.  Anyhooo,  I have a hard time with slow.  I don't have much patience (The Man will tell you that).  I'm an ARIES - deal with it!  I want what I want and I want it NOW.  I'm Pushy Cat.

This is driving me crazy.  That night was a whole 6 days ago...

Poor Slaps and Romanian - they have been on the receiving end of teenage-love-drama phone calls, '... and then he said... and I'm like...what do you think I should do?'  Waaaaaaaaaaaaa - the DRAMA!  The Romanian:  "Just WAIT!"  Slaps:  "You're halfway there.  Give it time."  Don't these girls KNOW me?  RRRR.  It is so frustrating.  It's like putting a bowl of Fruit Loops in front of a 4 year old and telling her to wait.  Either all the cereal goes on the floor in a mad explosion, or cereal stays where it is and a temper tantrum ensues.

I bought a new sofa and started moving my furniture around. Then back.  Then around some more.  I stare at my phone.  I changed his ringtone just incase.  I listen to the songs I know he likes.  Then I make plans with other people that I know I won't keep.  Then I make more plans.  I go out.  I go home.  He calls; he's been busy and has justifiable reasons why he hasn't been as attentive.  He laughs.  I don't find it funny but I do the fake-girl thing so he doesn't know it.

Yeah yeah - I know all the BS about "easy come, easy go."  This is a good thing.  I know that.  A solid relationship based on a solid foundation....  Not rushing in.... Yada yada blah blah blah.  Do you ever get too old for this crap?  What is the cut-off age?  (Please don't tell me "never"!)

I'm still staring at the frickin Fruit Loops wondering when they'll let me dive in.
Show me the Fruit Loops!
Show me the Fruit Loops!

Monday, May 09, 2011

Old Yeller Puppy wants a home

Beautiful Black Mouth Cur Puppy (famous Disney's movie" Old Yeller") is growing quickly and healthy. She ("Stella" - but not my friend, Stella)  has been to the vet and had her vaccinations.  She is likely just over 4 months old. She is fun loving and enjoys her walks. She is adorable, sweet dog, but my cats and rabbit in constant conflict with her so much that I have to give Stella away. We got her about 2 months ago, but conflict increasing by days.

 She is old enough and settled enough (loves people) to relocate to the home with someone who has a love and time for a dog. If you sincerely want a canine companion, please send your contact details to me at or call 9907 2583 so we can arrange a meeting with Stella.

Saturday, May 07, 2011


I got sick last night.  Really sick. The Ugly Sick. With crying.  Stealth stayed next to me all night and even held my hair.  What guy does that? I think the Universe got me sick on purpose and revealed how much he cares about me.  Dude has seen me at my ab-so-lute worst and was so sweet and compassionate about it (even though he wasn't feeling so great himself).

It is kind of driving me nuts that he can't verbalize how he feels, but then again, recent history has shown that a bunch of nicely-strung-together words doesn't amount to a hill of beans when there are no actions behind them.  (Show me the justification.)  And, the longer Stealth prolongs things, the more interested I get.  (Typical Aries.  We love a challenge.)

Thursday night we stayed awake until 6 am - talking all night again.  I can't get enough of his voice and apparently, ditto on his part.  I can't even remember what the hell we talk about, but we're laughing and carrying on like a couple of teenagers.  This is so cool.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Dancin inside my head

I just downloaded Stevie Nicks' new album, "In Your Dreams", just released on May 3.  I love Stevie Nicks; always have, for as long as I can remember.  I have been listening to her songs since I was maybe 9 years old, growing up in Foster, Rhode Island, where everything in the forest surrounding our 250 year old farm house seemed magical and scary at the same time.  Stevie Nicks' songs just seemed to fit into the whole scene; kindof mystical - like the owl that I heard outside my window and sometimes saw on the branch of a big tree above the dirt road (Spears Path) where we walked to school.  Anyways, I love this latest album.  I can't believe how great she looks after all this time.  I think that my friend, American Girl, looks a lot like Stevie Nicks.

Anyhoo, I'm happy today, Mashallah.  I've had a lot of happy days lately.  Dancing inside my head.  When I'm happy, I write more. Can you tell? :)  Lots of posts lately.

Stealth stopped by last night to see how I am doing and to talk a little; calling first to see if I needed anything from the store.  He breezed in, he breezed out, I slept contented thinking about him (instead of waking up almost every hour, on the hour, as I often do).  I'm going to give him a chance.  We'll both "see how it goes," as he says.  I think I can deal with slow and easy for a change; much different than my fast-and-hard typical Aries manner that usually doesn't yeild the best overall results.  He thinks I'm "sweet".  He's in for a big surprise, I think.

Stella is off on adventures for a while. I'm going to miss her.  She's made a tremendous contribution to my happiness and peace of mind this year, so I have to give thanks where thanks is due.  Get some rest, girl, and don't worry about us - we'll be fine here. 

While I'm at it, props to The Romanian and Slaps for making me giggle lately.  Partners in crime, through sick and sin.

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Dating for Sport (again.... )

The Man and I called it quits (for the God-only-knows how manyth time)  in February.  Seems the jet-setter is just too busy for the likes of me.  Que cera.

So, I am back to Dating for Sport and it has not only been fun, but fascinating.  I have met some really really nice guys lately.

I have also met some creatures;  Some have made “the devil I know” look like the Archangel, Michael (patron saint of chivalry among other things).  “The devil you know”:  Going back to the "devil I know" has been the option of choice for years now.   My dad (God rest his soul) would smack me upside the head with a rolling pin....

So, statistically…. There has to be something redeeming out there… somewhere….

I have fallen close-to-love (extreme like) 2 times since February (both Kuwaiti).  I don’t know if this is because they are really great guys or (more likely) that I’m rebounding.  (Or maybe because I have been so busy since then and meeting SO many people.)  One was so religious (thought I’d give that team a chance for once) that he immediately asked me to marry him – only because he didn’t want to be alone in a room (any room) with me any other way.  [He looked like a sheikh I’m hot for – totally tall and yummy. ( Not you – your brother….)]   It weren’t for love and he pretty much told me that our relationship would never be made public.  He was out the door.   I don’t adhere to that policy:  I’m not the type of girl to live in the shadows; I need the sun to flourish.

The other, I am still pining over (half Shammari – go figure!).  He is totally not my type; not someone who I would ever look at and think, ‘He’s the one.’  Yet, it is because he’s so different that I am so fassssssssssscinated.  Dude looks like an old rocker (who doesn’t sing nor play any musical instrument):  Long hair, kind of rough-around-the-edges look.   (I usually go for the dishtasha dudes – something about a sexy dishtasha… sigh).  He is actually younger than me, but he has more miles on his chassis.  He’s totally accepting of who I am and everything I stand for.  Desert Dawg loves him.  I love his thought process.  I love his stories – and I can talk to him and listen to him for hours….  But the kicker was, he told me immediately that he is in love with a married girlfriend.  He had a few other things going for him in the “cons” column that I can’t get my head around.  I know he is redeemable, but should I waste precious time in trying and playing the game, or should I just look for a COTS (Commercial Off The Shelf) package that fills all my specifications immediately? 

My thought process is pretty simple; if a guy really likes you, he’ll be tenacious about being with you.  For example:  The Man could have called anytime; could have sent flowers; could have tried to work things out, but never chose that route.  He chose instead to show me how little he cared (like when I asked him to take me to the doctor and his SMS response was, “I can’t” followed by turning off his phone).  Ah, “love”….  5 years of “love” 

(Et, by the way, I don’t count on men to help me when I really really need them anymore.  I call 1-800-GIRLFRIEND and an army, armed with swords and riding on white horses, comes to the rescue.  Perhaps, je suis cynical, however, I welcome the opportunity for men to prove me wrong..)

It is good that I can talk about this now because the opposite of love isn’t hate; it is indifference.  Hate takes energy.  Indifference doesn’t require a thang.

It is also good to have him finally out of my head.  I can’t even tell you how hard it was to be in love with someone and forcing myself to go out and meet/get to know other guys (while we were broken up).  Even when The Man and I had broken up and he wasn’t around, he was still WITH me all the time.  Now, he’s just not in the picture.  (I’m sorry if you are reading this and you feel sorry, but you know you could have had it all and you threw away your chances not a few, but hundreds of times.  It was never about anyone else.  It was all about us.)  Being the drama queen that I am (and thriving on it), I miss it sometimes.  I miss the family a LOT.  I miss hearing about their day-to-day stuff and feeling like I was part of something (which in reality, I wasn't - otherwise I wouldn't be alone on Islamic holidays, etc.)

Anyhoo, back to the real story:  Dating for Sport.   I had a date with a guy (I’m not even sure what his real name is and honestly don't care) and we agreed to have dinner.  He sat down and got on his phone (am I ugly?  Do I smell bad?).  He told me that his favorite restaurant would have cabinas (this one did not).   We ordered food.  Well, let me take that back… HE ordered what he wanted and then shut up long enough to allow me to tell the waiter what I would like.  More phone calls.  Several stares at my boobs.  The food arrived.  He ate out of the serving dishes.  He immediately asked for the check.  The waiter told him that the full meal had not arrived.  I happily volunteered to get it “to go”.  RAN to my car – no prolonged goodbyes there.  Dude had the nerve to call me back and send me text messages.  Yeh!  (It must have been in-between other oh-so-more-important calls… or, could be, that he spent 6KD on a meal and now thinks he’s going to get lucky.  NOT.)

In contrast, old rocker dude and I  had a GREAT date.  I loved it.  We laughed.  We both commented on the music they were playing (Unchain My Heart – how apr├Ęs peau).  We talked.  He makes me laugh.  We didn’t even realize it, but all the other patrons had gone; we closed the place down and we both asked for “just a few more minutes.”  I think I may be willing to give him several more chances.  Maybe I can fine tune the details.  

I have a date with an older guy who owns an engineering firm (also Kuwaiti).  He asked me what type of food I want and where I would like to meet him.  I told him to surprise me.  He’s taking me to The Balls of Kuwait (what I call the Kuwait Towers – Kuwait has 3 balls because… well… it’s Kuwait).  Isn’t that cool?  I love that!  What a great idea.  I’m really looking forward to it.

I’ve also got upcoming dates with several other potential candidates:  One is a business guy who has me scheduled into his book sometime next week (beware of the “busy man” – I smell trouble).  The other is a recently divorced, easy-going type who I think may prove to be too much of a fuddy-duddy.    I’ve also got a few young guys who are professing their undying admiration (yeah, sure).

Don’t ask me how I have been meeting so many people, but I have.  It seems that when your heart is unrestricted,  you notice people around you.  I’m only going to remember the tenacious ones, however.  Yalla – show me you care.  Prove it, big guy.

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

DG, The Family Advocate

Oooops, there it is....

Large number of wives 'cheat' on their husbands
Arab Times

KUWAIT CITY, May 2: A new department which has been established to look into cases filed by husbands who accuse their wives of infidelity is said to have received in 2010 alone 1,679 applications to check on the parentage of their children, reports Al-Qabas daily quoting legal sources.

Of these, 70 cases have proved to be negative (DG:  poorly written, but I take that to mean that 70% of the cases were returned stating that the women’s husbands had not sired the children). The sources say this shows a large number of women cheat on their husbands.

One of the lawyers disclosed when one man hired him to prepare a DNA test on his son he discovered the child was fathered by someone else.

The lawyer added, it is strange there is no clause in the Kuwaiti law to punish the wife who cheats on her husband unless she is caught in the act while committing adultery. To the contrary the husband is forbidden to kill or harm his wife because the law protects the wife and will punish the husband.

According to another news report, a Kuwaiti who holds PhD, requested a DNA test on his 8-year-old son and was shocked when the results did not match.

An elderly man who has four sons received more shocking news when he discovered each of his sons was fathered by a different man.

Meanwhile, lawyer Riyadh Al-Sanea speaking to the Al-Watan daily said the DNA tests have solved many problems. (DG:  Yeah, Riyadh - for the lawyers at least.)

For example, he said, when an unidentified maid accused her wealthy sponsor of impregnating her, the DNA tests proved she was telling lies. The tests proved the woman became pregnant after she had sex with a man working for the same sponsor. (DG:  em... more often than not, this probably would not be the case, eh?)

- end -

See film clip HERE
Duuh, a large number of husbands 'cheat' on their wives too!

Welcome to the world of technology, my friends.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.  Men have been cheating on women in this country for years and it has been allowed by the system.  Who do you think is fathering illegitimate children?  Probably married men! 

By Islamic law, a man has a something like no more than 14 days to claim a child as his own.  Done.   … which is how Kuwaiti law operates.  If you’re snowy white and your kid comes out coal dark, maybe you shouldn’t claim the kid as your own.  Just mithilin.

DNA tests prove paternity, but this is going to open a whole big can of worms for the country because discreetly, everybody is doing everybody.  There are going to be lots of juicy stories.  Bring in Jerry Springer!  DNA testing was mandatory for all Bedouns (at a cost of 85kd per person:  man, woman, and child).  They did not release the results because the next step was to mandate a nation-wide DNA testing and database and … OOOPS…. Open up a can of worms.  Surprising, isn’t it, that now, people are asking for and receiving DNA testing to prove paternity?  Let’s do this:  mandate the DNA testing nation-wide.  Then, cross-reference all the DNA samples to determine who really belongs to whom.  That would be fun.  Then, maybe the country could either fine or tax everybody who has been creepin and they would be able to fund an entire Department of Social Services (or the equivalent) for future generations.  (What does the Ministry of Social Affairs do pertaining to family law/advocacy anyhoo? Can anybody ‘splain that to me please?)

Seriously, though, I firmly believe that family law in Kuwait needs to be updated/upgraded.  There are too many problems and injustices on both sides.

It isn’t fair for men to have to pay 2/3 (or more) of their salaries to pay for child support  (and travel expenses for luxurious vacations, and “change of season” wardrobes, drivers, maids, etc.) which really goes to their x-wives, not their children (and hey - especially if the children were not sired by him).  The men's salaries should be taken into consideration for child support also.  It isn't fair that in some cases, men's entire salaries are automatically deducted from their accounts.  How can that be allowed?

It isn’t fair for men not to be able to be part of their children’s lives after divorce.  The court system should foster better relations between Kuwaiti kids and their dads; leading to better adults.   Everybody is always bitching about better family values in Kuwait, yada yada, and the “committees” dedicated to better family values (more likely “moral guidance” only as it pertains to “rehabilitating” transgender citizens; rather than helping to establish stronger/better family values).  Make it easier for Kuwaiti fathers to BE fathers.  I have divorced male Kuwaiti friends who haven’t been able to see their children in (not months but) YEARs.  Their kids don’t even have the chance to get to know them; let alone gain any values from them.

Each individual custody case needs to be reviewed individually.  You can’t make sweeping decisions on custody (“all kids should go to their mothers”, for example) when perhaps that isn’t what is in the best interest of the child.  The same goes when women ask men for a divorce and the children go to the father (and then he passes them off to his mother to raise along side a nanny or two).  Again, cases should be assessed to determine - case by case - what is in the best interest of the child.

It isn’t fair that women should be beaten or cheated on either and registered cases treated lightly in the court system.  It is not just a “family problem”;   it is a national problem and a viscous continuing cycle (if it is okay for dad to do, then it is ok for me.) Women need to have better support in the court system.  When daddy is out sleeping around and coming home drunk and then hitting mommy (or bringing her back a lovely STD), is that in the best interest of the child?  Why isn’t the woman able to punish the man in the courts here?  If you attach a monetary value to cheating/being abusive, then he (or she) will be less likely to do it IN the marriage BEFORE a divorce.  Where are the family advocates?  Social workers?

[(Someone please correct me if I am wrong here) Why aren’t there female judges in Kuwait?  Why are Egyptian and other nationals allowed to be judges in Kuwait and NOT female Kuwaitis who will act in the best interest of their country and people?  I believe family law would be better with both perspectives in the legal seat.]

Et, newsflash, when a woman isn’t treated well by a man (regardless of religion, culture, family, etc), she is most likely to look for another man.  End of discussion.  I’m not saying – at all – that two wrongs make a right.  It doesn’t.  I’m just saying that there are ways to make things better in the society and maybe  these are all social issues that need to be addressed – not just blaming women in some form of Salem witch hunt.

Monday, May 02, 2011

DG Blog Review in April 2011 Issue of Adam & Eve

So, today I am in my doctor's waiting room and I decide that since I have a ginormous thing of hand sanitizer in my bag (Bath & Body Works - holla!); that it is probably safe for me to pick up and read some magazines. (Usually, I get the mental-picture of germs crawling all over the mags from all the sickies who have picked them up - YUCK.)  Well, okay, it does make a difference what type of doctors office you're in too... and if it is cold and flu season.   .... (OMG I digress!)  Anyhoo, I picked up one called, "Adam and Eve". 

Now, if you are from the States, your mind will automatically go dirty (mine just stays there on endless loop). Everybody knows that the largest seller of sex toys and B rated porn online in the US is "Adam and Eve" (don't bother checking the link.  I can already tell you that it is barred by Kuwaiti ISPs, damn them!).  Alas, I had not heard of the Kuwaiti magazine under the same name.  It looks similar to Bazaar Magazine (note that I say "similar" because I am totally bias about the years and years of hard work Ahmad ElAdly has put into Bazaar to make it what it is today.  Props to my brothah.  Plus, they have just been very very good to me.).

And I'm reading... and I'm reading... and ... wait... WHAT?  "Desert Girl" said what?

The title was, "Discretion:  The Key to Any Relationship in Kuwait..." by Farah Al-Hashim.  Full story at link HERE.

Oh WOW!  Someone took the time to review my blog.  Holy snap.  What an honor.  Of course my head swelled out to here and I immediately called Slaps to tell her about it.  Tee hee.  (I mean, it isn't like I'm MARK getting reviews on CNN or anything, but it was a nice thang.)

The review was about my April 2009 blog post on, "How to pick up chicks in Kuwait."  It is also on my right side bar under, "DG Info:  How to make female Kuwaiti friends" (as that is more PC).  It basically tells you that Kuwaiti women are NOT unapproachable, but it is all about HOW you approach them.  The author looked at it from the perspective of how relations should be discreet in Kuwait - which is true - and that perhaps some women in Kuwait would welcome the introductions.  (From personal experience, I know 100% for sure that my Kuwaiti girlfriends are open to it - as long as the proper ettiquette is followed.  "Treat her right and you'll never be wrong.")

I caught more sh%t for this post than I have in a long time; mostly from those of the male gender making statements of how cheap my tutorial approach was; and how no self-respecting Kuwaiti woman would want anyone to approach her like that.  Yada.  You know - comments generally stated by those with a penis and self-esteem issues.  Like one guy who said, "I hope your post isn't taken too seriously, and shame on you to encourage such actions, i've hated going out for the past few years becuase of the ridiculousness i see on the streets and in malls, all of which have been described in your guide..."  Actually, if you read what I had to say (NOT a "guide"); again, the point is that it would be done DISCREETLY so that no one would be able to see it at all.  Bada BING.

The review author is Kuwaiti (I assume).  I am not; Says so right on the top of this here bloggaroo.  The article states that I am a young Kuwaiti who went overseas for an education and got exposed to another culture.  Oh yup, I've been exposed (to a LOT), but  I'm an American and came here in 1996 and stayed.  I respect my Kuwaiti sistahs, but alas, I am not one.  I'm Irish, Finish, French and Iriquois Indian (Native American Indian).  I have known Kuwaitis for most of my life; more years than I care to mention as it would give away my real age, and ask the review stated  - I am "young" - which we all know is true, of course.

Also, gotta say:  This blog is not, and never has been about fashion.  I have never commented on how I think Kuwaiti women are high-fashion.  I don't get into all that stuff.  I don't believe that I have ever mentioned the words, "Dolce" or "Fendi" on my blog.  I shop at Target, JC Penney, Dillards, and places where I don't have to slap someone else's name on my ass; I have my own name (and ass). (Note:  I said "slap" and "ass" in one sentence.  Aint that a thang?!)  I have my own "style" (if you can call it that).  I don't promote spending a lot of money on something that  you can get in a discount store later (unless it is a particular piece that I LOVE and then I will buy it for the sheer joy of loving it, not because it is designer).  Fashion "seasons" can KMA.  I think it is wasteful; especially when there are so many needy people in the world.  I can understand how Farah would take a bit of literary license with it because it appeared in a somewhat of a fashion magazine with fashion advertisers. (Cha ching.)

The blog POST was definitely dedicated to men, but as a whole, not so much.  All kinds of nas read my stuff (and I still don't comprehend WHY? Dont' you beoble have better things to do?), so it isn't really targeting a gender-specific audience.

It was really cool to be mentioned in a review and then discovering it in such a surprising manner.  Thanks, Farah! :)  Lets get together and have coffee sometime.  I bet we have a lot of war stories to share!

Return Dowry

This is the first time I have heard of anything like this in Kuwait (at least the 2nd Paragraph).  I don’t know how the court can get away with issuing that fine because the deferred is always paid by the man and it is his form of alimony.  How can they ask a woman to pay it to a man?  Also, if dude had already consummated the marriage (which I’m only assuming that they had), how could the court ask the wife to pay back her dowry?  Being a lush doesn’t seem crime enough to fit the punishment. How many women marry alcoholic men? 

Arab Times - May 1, 2011 
Return dowry’: The Court of Appeals upheld the verdict of a First Instance Court that ordered a wife to pay back her dowry worth KD 15,000 to the husband.

Also, the woman will be compelled to pay additional KD 10,000 in deferred dowry (usually paid in Muslim divorce cases).  (DG:  Paid to the WOMAN – NOT the man!)

The husband filed a lawsuit against the wife claiming their marriage life had become impossible due to improper behavior of the woman and cited she returned home intoxicated and started fighting with him as he tried to ask where she had been. The man stressed he was surprised when he learnt the wife had filed a complaint and accused him of beating her.

Meanwhile, investigators had noticed she wasn’t in normal condition and ordered a blood test, which eventually revealed she had consumed alcohol.

Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ya!

I have a lot of thoughts on OBL's death. 

It was inevitable that eventually they would get him.  I would have preferred to have seen the shoot-out broadcast live on TV like some kind of Steven Segal action flick.  I saw the dead-Osama photo and it is purty gross.  I even kinda get the fish-food/dump him in the sea scenario; although at first I thought it was a conspiracy thing (and I'm sure there are lots of people who firmly believe that it is and OBL is down in the swamp somewhere livin la vida loca with Elvis and Michael;  livin on the gov'ment dime.)

O did a terrible injustice to the millions of Moslems around the world who live in peace and tolerance.  He abused Islam in the most vile ways. I think we have all been affected (to some degree) personally by the whole Osama thing.   I think he should have died - and I don't think it should have been an honorable, dignified death; which, from everything I have heard, it was not.

Having  said all that... my very first thoughts when I heard he was dead were for his family.  I felt very bad for his mother.  I don't know what her religious or political beliefs are, but I can only imagine how much agony his life (and death) have brought her regardless. I wouldn't wish that on anyone's family.

You can only hope that your kids grow up to be decent people, but when it comes down to it, we're all individuals and we are created differently.  Some just have loose wiring.

Adios, MoFo.  Who will be the next global enemy?

Sunday, May 01, 2011

It had to be done

It started when someone named her Beatrice.

Welcome Back to The Weekend Variety Show, Starring Me, Me, Me

Disclaimer I:  This is about as good as it gets, so if you think it is pathetic or just too boring, you can turn away now. If you choose to comment that it is pathetic or boring, I will say to you: 'backatcha for being pathetic enough to leave a comment on how pathetic is is.' 

Although not really a weekend activity, it was Stella's big birthday this week, so we took her out to Muhallab and I think (hope) she had a good time.  She's always the life of the party and we have lots of laughs.  I didn't have time to find an appropriate birthday hat for her, otherwise I would have made her wear it (not that I could "make" her do anything) and it would have been embarrassing, yet fun (yes, Slaps, just like you made me do!).  I love Muhallab (brief review HERE).  They are also one of the only places in Kuwait where you can order sheem (yummy kind of Kuwaiti local fish.  Noidear what the name is in Engleezi. I'll have to look it up in my Kuwaiti fishes book.)  Muhallab does great birthday cakes too and we got Stella a fruity cake (well, girl, if the cake fits...) 

The Paragraph of Shame:  Stella's children (you know who you are and I assume she does too) didn't call by the time we finished dinner at 10:30pm.  That means all day. Poor thang.  I felt bad for her.  If it was my mom's landmark big birthday... yo!  Shame on you, Children of Stella!  So wrong.

Here's one for ya: (they also deliver balloons and card).  Teleflora delivers to Kuwait... so does FTD through their partner network. will deliver cakes in Kuwait, so does the Crowne Plaza Hotel network  - and that goes for the rest of you people in Overseas Land who want to do something nice for your mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, aunts in Kuwait.  Do the RIGHT THING.  - End of Sermon -

One more birthday party in April....  S The German had his birthday pool party on Thursday night.  I was kinda tired, but got there anyhoo with The Romanian. Butterfly and Spanx both looked bagorgeous as usual. S's wife, D, looked like a movie star.  She must think I'm a freak because whenever I see her, I just stare (she is just so pretty).  Sat around, ate lots of good food, dissed the E (sorry, I just can't do it.  Never will. E:  Livin the Secret Life of Foreigners In Kuwait. Plus I am still taking antibiotics to recover from last week's overdoing it by not getting enough sleep - aka "partying"), and went home happy.  Spanx cooked.  (How do  you do it?  I don't get it....), salad, cupcakes, cake balls... always different varieties (my favorite is red velvet - yummm).

Stealth came over late (I am loving that he lives in my neighborhood - a "round the way guy") and what was once a one-off is turning into a nice routine; talking all night until the sun comes up.  Believe it or not, he does most of the talking. Thanks dude -  you make me laugh and Desert Dawg is quite content. 

When Stealth says, "Oh my God" he sounds just like Shamlan used to and I'm flashed back to another time and place (so I try to get Stealth to say "Oh my God" as frequently as possible!)  Stealth definately has one of the sexiest voices I've ever heard.  No one's voice will ever compare to Shamlan's, bien sur, and his laugh was unique (I still hear it after all these years).  But, Stealth's sexy voice makes it really easy to listen to him for hours and hours; 'Just talk, baby, just talk...'    The next sexiest voice in my contest-world was held by Bu Merdas.  He has such a deep voice; almost of the Barry White variety.  Sigh.  High-pitched, girlie voices just don't do it for me; and anything nasal is an immediate turn-off (Ick!  Be gone, cockaroach!).  I would say that high-pitched male voices are on par with a limpy, weak male handshake. 

Handshakes (good ones):  There is a particular sheikh I know (you know who you are and I know that you know who I am) who has all the ladies spellbound by his 2-handed handshake (when someone places their palm over the top of your hand when they are shaking it.  It is usually accompanied by direct eye contact - mesmorizing....).  Everybody who is on the receiving end of this 2-handed handshake believes that SHE is important to him.  I know it is all a marketing/PR ploy; however, it really does the trick.  You kind of leave his office sighing, "Oh, I'm special." when in reality... it's just a handshake and you should get over yourself.  I have conferred with several other people I know (a random sampling of 5 of both genders)  in reference to this sheikh and his magical shakes ("Sheikh Shakes" ha ha).  It seems to be only bestowed on females and all are equally captivated.  Tee hee.  Plus dude, you have really soft hands. 

(I'm crackin myself up again!)

I read Sheikh Dude's palms several times on occassions when we talked and that is entirely another story for another time and place.  I read Stealth's this weekend and he went white.  Tee hee.  Love it!  It's all like reading a map. I think sometimes that people think that I am stupid because I stare at them blankly when they are talking to me ("dumb" blonde thang - deer in the headlights look), but I am reading.... palms, body language, yada...

Slapperella had a Royal Wedding Party at her place.  The Romanian and I were busy making hats (from plastic margarita glasses) because we couldn't find any that weren't beach hats.  Finally, 30 minutes before the party was about to begin, we went to Nooran (who would have thought) and found what we were looking for; both had feathers, the Romanian's had a veil.   They were so cute that we decided to wear them in the car and wave, royal style, at everybody who stared at us.  One guy was laughing really hard (WITH us not AT us), then rolled his window down and invited us to dinner.  (He's CUTE, y'anee shinu mishkilla/ what's the problem?)

A word on Nooran:  there are only a very few shops down one side of the road in souq salmiya across from BHS.  Soud Shahood Mutairi (where has dude gone?  He was all we were hearing about for months whileback.  And dude - where is your friend, K, with the white Bentley?)  supposedly bought the strip and was going to turn it into something (2008-ish? before the financial crisis) and it is just sitting there looking like a war zone. It is pretty sad.  I love the old Kuwait and it is all being torn down for the sake of "progress" (in other words:  erecting more poorly-constructed, never-maintained buildings that will be torn down in the sake of "progress" in 15 years).  Anyhoooooo... Nooran is still there, smack dab in the middle (sign in Salmiya is in Arabic I think, but you can tell by the accessories in the window).  There are other locations - in Souq Sharq for example.  Nooran is probably (and correct me if I'm wrong) one of the oldest Kuwaiti-owned accessory shops in the country.  They sell pretty hejabs (scarfs), pins, costume jewelry, etc. and are my destination of choice for The Tiaras (not that I buy them all the time, but sometimes for gag gifts, yada.  I also of the firm belief that every princess, real or innerly-perceived, should own one.).  If you are looking for very pretty, not-terribly-expensive scarves - silk and otherwise (for gifts or for yourself), go check out Nooran.  (You can also often find cool scarves where ever they sell hejabs around Kuwait for a few dinars.)  (Disclaimer II:  Said with respect because I believe all religions are to be respected):  Word to the evil:  They blast the Quran.  I have a hard time staying there very long because my evil genies are disturbed by the audio...  I would have a hard time shopping in a store where they blast Christian music or chanting either.  There is a time and a place for it and I just don't think the religious aspect should enter into a shopping experience [especially if you are like me with a guilty conscience and immediately think that I should NOT be shopping, but giving to the poor (you bad, bad capitalist!); em... which kind of detracts from the whole purpose of being in the shop in the first place, n'est pas?].  I'm just say-in'....

Back to my story...

The party was really cool.  We were all supposed to show up in going-to-a-wedding attire.  Butterfly's outfit was by far the best; quite regal. Slaps wore a blonde wig (she's brunette) and a short dress (dayam girl!  You got some LEGS!)  Spanx wore a teal dress with matching earrings.  I don't know how Spanx does it - she's pregnant out-to-here and manages to bake for days and days before any kind of an event and it is all amazing.  She had never made scones before and they were great.  She also made little finger sammiches (sans crust) and mini cupcakes.  Dude!  You rock.  We love you.  Special K, I don't know why you weren't your normal, perky self, but I will get to the bottom of that.  Slaps made tea and showed us the appropriate way to hold the cup, pinkie placement, etc.  Personally, I think she made it up and it was all bullshyt (that's Briddish), but that's just me. 

I LOVE that Kate Middleton Whatshernamenow? did her own make-up for the wedding.  (Yes, she did too, Slaps.)  See, she's someone I can see eye-to-eye with.  Wasn't she beautiful?  I cried - because it was on TV and that is like the only time I cry anymore (Mashallah, Mashallah, Mashallah) after seeing something like a dogfood commercial or a wedding.  It was so beautiful.  Everything was so perfect.  Ya know - I have decided that I want a fly-over for my wedding.  Nothing like a C130 or anything, but just a couple of fighter jets would be dignified.  (If I'm lucky, I'll get one or 2 remote-control aircraft....)

I called Adool on the way home (same neighborhood as Slaps) and had an entire 1-sided-funny (I thought) conversation with him.... before I realized I had the wrong number.  Ooops, my bad.Oh well.  I'm sure I'll get a late-night call back from that one.  He sounded real happy to hear from me, whoeverhewas.

So... back home in time for a nap and no further plans.  The Romanian was tired, so she went home.  I was left to my own evil devices ONCE AGAIN.  So... Stealth and his friend came over - no idea what time and it all started over again. We were afraid friend-dude's wife was going to be mad (he left at like 3ish) and that we'd find him sleeping in his car the next day...   Next time - it's on the boat, so you have a good alibi.

....Cut to the next morning when Pinkies shows up for my massage and mani/pedi.   They really really really rock.  Thanks, K!  Your new masseuse is awesome.  Peoples:  You've got to call them!  I was barely awake (still in my PJs) and was being pampered (which was my plan for the day).  Then, I had appointments for The Romanian and I at Spa Aquatonic for facials.

Note to self:  Find a man who will pamper you to this level.  Further note to self:  Make sure the pampering man isn't gay.  For your information:  you know a guy who is going to pamper a girl isn't going to be married because the bastards have been married for so long that THEY want to be the ones getting pampered (because their wife has given up on that shit loooooonng ago) and dude will never have time or energy to pamper YOU.  I had a guy who took me to be pampered ONCE and I thought/ASSumed he was gay because he wore capris and drove a Cabriolet, but he later got married (he could still be gay - dunno).

I don't know what is going on with the customer service at that spa (Aquatonic), but it is going downhill but fast.  They asked us to wait - and we ended up sitting there for a long time with no attention as staff walked by with their heads down (no eye contact).  I finally went up to the reception desk and stood there for an uncomfortably long time, with 5 people behind the desk (all looking down to avoid... scary customers...)  before asking oh-so-polished-shiny-shoe-Lebanese-dude, 'Excuse me, do you work here?'  "Yes, yes, I know.... we are trying to find 'them'."  WTF is "them"?  We got in finally and had great facial treatments.  I was snoring like a mofo (I know, right?  not very lady-like.  Je ne care pas. I snore and I'm not ashamed - some call it "purring").  Payment at the reception desk was no treat either.  They act like you are doing them a great favor by being there.  I would get all huffy and say that I will never grace their doorstep again, but they probably know (as I do) that they are the best place in town and that I'm not going anywhere.  I can still complain, right?  SPA AQUATONIC:  YOUR SERVICE SUCKS!

So, we barely were able to keep our eyes open for sushi (managed to anyways).  There was a lady at a table next to us (from Egypt, I think) who had 4 rambunctious young boy children with her, ordering food with a coupon. (Dude, I love my coupons that I get with my Priviledge Club membership!  They rock and sometimes I give them as gifts too - which is probably how she got hers.)  She was trying to determine how much food they could get for the coupon value and was having a hard time (when it comes down to it, 20kd doesn't get you a lot of food in Sakura, really).  Her son asked how much a large bottle of water cost....   (You should NOT be shopping, DG!!!) We left some cash for them so that her kids could have desert.  Just makes you stop and think.... 

I went to sleep early;  Not that I could have gone out anyways with the crap weather.  Who gets humidity, heavy dust, and then thunder, lightening, and heavy rain?  It is like some surreal set from a science fiction movie around here.  Freaky.  I can't believe that it is now May and we are still getting rain.  Unheardof!  What up, Kuwait?