Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Desert Girl Kuwait Dating Update

I haven't posted anything personal in a while because... well... too many of my close friends and associates know who I am and it is hard to tell a really good story these days.

I will throw out a few little tidbits.

I have taken a hiatus from dating.  I have become really tired of the goods ("the odds are good, but the goods are odd.")  I'm just not impressed anymore.  Well, let me rephrase that - no one has taken the effort to impress me.  Maybe I'm just wiser and more jaded.  I dunno.

Maybe the world has changed too much too fast.  I'm not into "hooking up."  I'm not into manboys who invite themselves to MY home.  If I do agree - even on a friendship basis - they come empty handed.  There's no honor, no etiquette.  No steps towards a healthy relationship.

The closest I've come to real dating (like dinners and a movie or other activities) lately is with real friends (great steaks, Bunny!) and that's it.  Plus romantic moonlit walks with my dog (who I actually prefer the company of these days...).

So on to the anecdotal Kuwait dating stories...

Bachelor #1.  Drop dead gorgeous.  I had seen him over the course of maybe a year and a half. I always thought he was married;  He has that air about him.  I never asked even though he knows many of my friends.  He finally made a move and on my birthday (well, the days following) invited me to his farm and bought me a birthday cake.  I really like the guy (to this day - wish things could be different).  But.... after a romantic evening of cake and farm (and NOT in the sitting area where cake should be served - nothing happened.  Cake served only.)  stopped calling and relinquished me to the friend zone.  Huh?  What was that all about?  Tried again when we both were in Dubai (separately) and the only time he could see me was after 1 am.  Uh... Hel-luuur.  There are plenty of Russian prostitutes in Dubai that are actually active at that time of night, but that does not apply to me.  I was at a comfortable hotel with a pillow menu.  I wasn't going anywhere.

Bachelor #2.  Long conversations first online and then over the phone.  I would prefer to get to know someone first before meeting. Saves time and trouble.  In this case, it was a wise choice. Invited himself to my house.  'Sorry but no.'  Told me that "when we are girlfriend and boyfriend, I insist to help you with expenses.  It is just the way I am."  I'm thinking, honorable, but not quite the stuff phone conversations are made of.  Plus - I don't need anyone's money and it makes me feel like someone else is trying to control me.  Awk-ward.  He insisted on coming over to meet me "just for 5 minutes." followed by, "The holy month is coming up and we won't be able to see each other very often."   What?!  Nuh uh. (Sounds like we are already IN a relationshit...)  Anyhooser, continued the conversations.  I offered to meet him somewhere for coffee or dinner.  "Sure.  When we are in Dubai or anywhere outside of Kuwait."  Oh.No.He.Di.Int.  So basically homeboy wants to keep me in the house (MY hosue), pay my rent, and not be seen in public with me.  He he.  Good one. If I wanted to be a kept woman I would never have worked to begin with.  Buh byyyyye.  (And I thought I was the girl in the relationship.)  If it is that way, please go ask mommy to find you a wife; more expensive, perhaps, but at least you can both go out in daylight together.

Bachelor #3.  Asked me for 120 KD to get his car fixed.  Ha ha. That's a good one.  Made pay-my-rent dude look semi-normal.

Bachelor #4.    Bachelor #4 and I were getting along ok, but for some reason, I decided to dump him and since my BFF who keeps all my dating notes was outside of Kuwait, I couldn't ask her what happened.  (If you ever piss me off,  you need to make friends with my BFF because I can't remember shit and she keeps track of all my dirt.  She usually reminds me because my memory is so bad).  Anyhooser, I couldn't remember what it was about him that made me so angry. I do remember we had a nice meal together... he had a nice car... Oh yeah... but there it was:  ARROGANCE.  He knows everything AND he doesn't like dogs (deal breaker.  Find your own way to the door!). Furthermore, I don't like people who think that I have no opinion on Kuwait.  Why talk trash about fellow Kuwaitis? "Bedouins are ruining this country.  Shiites are trying to take over.... Yada yada.  shutthefuckup!  Racism within a country that is the size of New Jersey.  Sigh.   Plus - he had been dating a friend of mine in the interim and went into detail about her and I can't tell her and feel bad about it.  Anyways, the ONE time I invite him over (and he arrives empty handed, of course!) he calls just prior to arrival and says, "Is your dog going to be there? (WTF of COURSE - he lives there!!!) Would you put him somewhere?"  How bout I put YOU somewhere?  (like on the curb.)

(If you're read down this far, just know that 1-5 didn't all happen in a matter of a month.  I'm spreading this out over the past year plus for effect, ok?).

Bachelor #5.  Nice dinner.  Smelled good.  A little on the small side for a man, but I am not as picky as I used to be.  Good job as a banker.  Very polite....  until..... Dick pic.  WHYYYY????  Another female blogger sums it up HERE and speaks very nicely for the masses who have been on the receiving end of such a "gift" as a wonder worm.  As she says, "...But let me make one thing clear: seeing a digitized image of your dork does about as much for me sexually as watching my cat vomit and then eat it."  I don't need to go into further detail.  Some girls get second dates;  Some girls get penis photos.  (Why are mild-mannered bankers always the freaky ones?!)

Speaking of bankers....

This didn't happen recently (maybe almost 2 years ago), but I will tell you the story anyways because it is funny.  Chairman of a Bank:  I've known dude for years and he always calls to say he's coming over because he "misses me" - code...  Ok whatever.  Don't judge.  It happens.  So, he would always come empty-handed.  I got sick of this.  Can we not have a meal together? WTF?!  Bring me one of those Mr. Baker trays or something.  A girl gets hungry.  So, I finally broke it to him that if he wanted to continue to see me, he needed to do something about that.  (What?  I didn't specify.)  So he shows up with a little bag - a gift.  I thought it was really sweet.... I waited until the next morning to open it.  And then I called him.  (Sans salutations)  'What the F is THIS?!  It's a corporate gift from Wataniya Airlines!  They don't even exist anymore!  What - did you have it in your desk at work and just decide to bring it to me?? You couldn't have brought sandwiches or maybe chocolate?!'  That was the end of that.

All walks of life.  Doesn't matter.  What ever happened to dinner and flowers?  My 21 year old nephew says that sending flowers to a girl is "gay."  My sister chimed in on that one and said, "Oh my God!  Where have you been?  They don't do that anymore!  They text!"  Yup.  That's what's happened.  Let me tell you, nephew:  Send even ONE girl that you really like some flowers with a note saying you would like to take her to dinner.  SEE what happens.  Do just a test with an inexpensive arrangement.  Watch and learn.

Sigh.  The new world sucks.  I used to get diamond earrings and stuff (thanks, Schmed - you know who you are!)

Ok so yes - I meet a lot of men; often through the dog groups that I frequent.  The problem with the dog guys is they respect me.  Because I am good friends with one of the group leaders.  El Chapo.   I have heard several times, "I can't approach her!  She is close friends with (Mr. X)...."  It's almost like I'm a mafia wife and the rest of the men won't even talk to me.  Mr. X (JUST a friend) would be thrilled to hear this, I'm sure!  I think it is kind of funny, but at the same time, not so cool because he's blockin my action.  "I respect you...."  Ok FINE.  Respect me AND....

Is there no middle ground?

And one more thing before I end my rant (therapy):  We can not be friends.  Friends are there for each other.  Can I call you if I need your help and will you come?  Be honest.  If I already know the answer to that question is "No" then we aren't friends; we are acquaintances.  I know who my friends are.  They are the ones that volunteer to take me to the doctor when I'm sick.  Or help me with car problems.  Or that call me or who I call (even if it has been months) to either check on each other or to seek support and advice.  Or just want to drop by to see me just because it has been too long.


Got a (stupid) question? Check out Kuwikipedia

Link:  http://kuwikipedia.com

There was one on here, "Where do I buy weed?" but apparently the admin removed it.  There is no moderation so I am wondering how far you could go.... hmmmm.

Sunday, May 29, 2016

Compassion towards animals

I wrote this today on my “real name” Facebook account and got a very nice response from a friend, so I am publishing.

My post:

It is the week before Ramadan when "God-fearing" people dump animals so that their house guests or inhabitants will be more comfortable knowing that there is no pet in the house. I don't believe that God will hear their prayers. In fact, if you read the Quran and are a believer, you would never be cruel or neglectful of an animal; on the contrary. God teaches us all kindness and compassion in any religion. Pay attention. Donate to local animal shelters.

Her response:

We all learned this story when we were children and  it's all over Muslims books by prophet Mohammad.

“A woman was tormented because of a cat which she had confined until it died and she had to get into Hell. She did not allow it either to eat or drink as it was confined, nor did she free it so that it might eat the insects of the earth”. (Sahih Muslim)

In addition, over two hundred verses in the Quran deal with animals and six chapters of the Quran are named after animals; including but not limited to Ant, Bee, camel, cow, dog, elephant , horse & lion & many more you can google it.

In Quran there is a verse that says "And there is no animal that walks upon the earth nor a bird that flies with its two wings but (they are) genera like yourselves; We have not neglected anything in the Book, then to their Lord shall they be gathered."

In Islam, the Quran strongly enjoins Muslims to treat animals with compassion and not to abuse them. All creatures are believed to praise God, even if this praise is not expressed in human language.

Prophet Mohammad blessings be upon him, said, “Once a man suffered from thirst while he was walking on a journey. When he found a well, he climbed down into it and drank from it. Then he came out and saw a dog lolling its tongue from thirst and licking the ground. The man said: This dog has suffered thirst just as I have suffered from it. He climbed down into the well, filled his shoe with water, and caught it in his mouth as he climbed up. Then he gave the dog a drink. Allah appreciated this deed, so he forgave him.” It was said, “O Messenger of Allah, is there a reward for charity even for the animals?” The Prophet said, “In every living being there is a reward for charity.”

The time I walked into the wrong house: A Ramadan Story

This is a true story in the true spirit of Ramadan.  It is funny and you can laugh at my foibles (because Lord knows - I do!) but it is also a story that will stay with me for the rest of my life because it has such a great moral.

My friend, Um Salah, (former parliamentarian Rola Dashti's mother and a long-time friend)  invited me to ftour at her house during Ramadan.  I hadn't been to their house in over a year and wasn't really sure if I remembered the way.  She told me, "If you get lost, you'll see my son's Pajero parked in front."

(Clue #1:  Everyone in Kuwait owns a Pajero.) 

So, off I went before sunset.

I went to the house and low and behold:  a Pajero was parked outside.  I rang the front bell and a housekeeper answered.  I asked if it was the Dashti house.  She said yes and brought me into the house and I sat in the living room.

One by one, family members appeared and asked the same polite questions.  "Salam alaykum." 'Alaykum salam.'  "Mubarak alayk shahar..." "How are you?  How is your family?" 'I'm fine thank you.  How have you been?  How is your family?' and so on...

So this went on and on with family members I didn't recognize.  But - that's not unusual in Kuwait because it is Ramadan and family members are visiting and people are coming and going.

(Should have been Clue #2:  but... notsomuch)

As I sat there, I admired Um Salah's new furniture.

(Clue #3)

So finally, a very nice young lady about my age comes down.  She's super friendly and I immediately like her (do I know her?  Have we met?  Is she a sister or cousin?  Dunno.)  She goes through the polite questions (as above).  And then says,

"Habibti.  I think you're in the wrong house."  Completely kindly and with total grace and hospitality.

Me: 'Oh, I asked your maid if this was the Dashti house and she said yes.'
Her:  "She's an idiot.  Um Salah lives behind us.  Would you like to join us for ftour?"

OMG!  How incredibly kind!  THAT is the true spirit of Ramadan.  Welcoming people to join in breaking fast together.  I really was overwhelmed (not by my own stupidity or the situation I was in, but by blind kindness!).  THAT is the Kuwait I know and love.  THOSE are my people!

I turned around and the entire group had come down and everyone was smiling and welcoming me.  You know - God sends you angels.  I should have gotten the name of their family.  Maybe one of them will read this and remember.  I remember them distinctly - every Ramadan and occasionally other times like now.

I sent them flowers the next day to thank them.  I love this Ramadan story.  I am hopeful that there are more people out there like them.

Blondeness Side Note:

This was not the first time I walked into the wrong house.  My first job was as a housekeeper.  (yes me - scrubbing toilets and washing floors).  My mother made me get a job to teach me the value of money. It worked.  I'm grateful.   I worked on a street where most of the houses looked the same.  I usually started my work in the basement, ironing shirts in their laundry room and then working up to the top floor (with a stop in the kitchen because I was 14 years old and of course I was going to raid their refrigerator!).  So, I did what I normally did:  Let myself in and started ironing shirts.  It took me a while to figure out that things were slightly different and I was in the wrong place.  They got several shirts ironed for free (with starch - I was gooood at ironing).  I dashed off to the right house before I got caught.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Royal Kennel, Kuwait

This is Royal Kennel in Kabd. It belongs to my friend, Yasser. I had the pleasure of a tour the other day and I am thoroughly impressed. 

The dome shaped objects in the background of the video are dog houses that open into grassed pens for play time. The indoor kennels are tiled, clean, and air conditioned. Their services include daily walks, daycare, socialization and dog training and they have a large staff of compassionate helpers.

I took Mikey and he got to play/socialize with one of Yasser's sassier female German Shepherds.  He had a great time and was finally worn out when I got home.

Indoor Kennel

Visitor Area

See @royal.kennel.q8 for more details, photos and videos.  Make sure to book in advance of your summer vacation. Phone 6969 6929

Helping to promote a friend's cosmetic line: Mistique

My friend, Tiffani, is a hairstylist and make-up artist. She's a soft-spoken Jamaican woman who I met when I was trying to give away excess clothing and household stuff;  and she came over to take whatever I had to give to various charities she works with in Kuwait.  I immediately liked her.

Tiffani specializes in African-American and mixed girls' hair.  She also does eyelash extensions.  Lately, she has been promoting her Canadian cosmetics line, Mistique.  She sent me over this pretty little make-up case which included some of her new cosmetics.  I've gotta say - after meeting me only once - she aced my colors.  And - she included the 3D Fiber Lash Mascara which I have been wanting to try.

I loved all of it and I also loved how it is not tested on animals.  That's very important to me.  If you are looking for a new line for your shop or salon - here it is.  The make up is also a great idea for gifts.  (I know I liked being on the receiving end!)

Thank you, Tiffani, for becoming a fast friend and for the lovely gifts.  I wish you much success!

2 Million Page Views!

Holy snap!  You people actually read this stuff?  2 million views?  Whutuuuup?  WOW.   This is a great excuse for CAKE!

When I started the blog back in 2004, I was just doing it to let out some anonymous frustration about everything in general (cheaper than therapy).  I have tried to remain as anonymous as possible over the years, but unfortunately people actually talk and word has gotten around.  That makes it more difficult to write all the juicy stuff that I would love to write about.  Well, I do write about it, but there are some stories that I just don't publish and maybe I will do that someday.  It makes for interesting reading.

I've really tried not to offend anyone. I don't use real names.  My anonymity doesn't give me the right to trash people on the internet (so I believe) so I don't (even though there are some that are really really really deserving).   Some of the stories are so "interesting" that I have to omit details or bend it a little, but I always try to keep it real.  Nothing is untruthful.  Everything is based on my own personal opinion, so it is a 1-sided perspective.  I can't make this shyt up.  It is what it is.

Thank you all for stalking me throughout the years.  This has been, and will continue to be, fun for me!

Sunday, May 22, 2016

Mirror Mirror....

(... don't even go there.  It's not me.  It's the name of a salon.)

Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Jabriya, there lived a fair princess who opened a salon.  But then, the Wicked Witch of the East moved in a few buildings down and decided to jack the name, calling her salon the same thing.  So just in case you get confused, we  (and by "we", I mean the voices in my head) are referring within this post to the ORIGINAL Mirror Mirror salon next to Organica and behind the Royal Hyatt Hospital.  Different logo. (The correct one is above.)

If you are looking for a Western salon, I highly recommend Mirror Mirror.  I get a lot of questions from readers about where to go for blondness - here ya go, my friends....

So I ventured to the Kingdom of Jabriya. (I do this only once or twice a year because I hate the traffic so much, but if you time it right, you can get in and out pretty easily.)  I was invited by the salon owner, the lovely Mrs. Wendy Al-Omani.

Now, I'm no hair cheater.  Y'alls know that I  have been going to Connie at Underground Hair and I love what she has done to my hair.  Alas, Connie has been in the States and gave me her approval to go to Mirror Mirror in her absence.  (Hell to the Yes I needed it! She's from Kentucky!!! Those girls don't play!)

I waited a respectable amount of time before phoning Wendy.  I didn't want to offend anyone.  And I finally visited her this weekend.

I love the place - for several reasons.  First of all, it feels like home.  It feels like a salon in a small town where everybody knows everybody.  It didn't hit me at first, but all the clients (that day) were American.  And I knew some of the names from yester-year.  And then I started remembering stylists and nail techs from back-in-the-day at Images.  You'll never guess who is at Mirror Mirror!!  The Queen of Ingrown Toenails, Gloria!  So cool. All my long-lost buddies in one place.

(I'm digressing a LOT this morning.  Probably because I took a pill to relax my back last night and then I had some coffee which has just made me loopy.  Back to our story....)

I love the decor.  It is so fresh and inviting.  But that blended with the mixture of people sitting around, relating stories made me feel like part of it all.  It was kind of like being reeled into a TV drama.  I seriously just want to go back to catch up on people's lives!  But of course, for their services as well.

Alexa did my hair.  She definitely could be the "fairest of them all."  She's so cute and what I like about her is that she isn't "switched off"; she is paying attention to the customer the entire time. We had a fun conversation and I came out with beautiful blondeness once again.

Mirror Mirror has a bouquet of services including nail treatment, massages, make up, and facials.  I'm going back for a sports/hot stone massage combo (not that I'm athletic, but it helps with sit-on-yer-ass-in-front-of-your-computer-all-day aches.  You know what I'm sayin.)

Thank you, ladies, for the wonderful afternoon.  I had a great time and I hope to see you again soon!

Price listing and services is below (it didn't come out well in color, so I had to scan in black and white.  You may have to download to see it clearly.  Try clicking on the image first.  Sorry.)

Thursday, May 19, 2016

Brutal Sex Attack on European Woman in Spanish Villas, Salwa Block 10‏ - Update

Rape bid foiled – ‘Could not resist’
Arab Times

KUWAIT CITY, May 18: Personnel from the Criminal Investigations Department have arrested a former Kuwaiti criminal for breaking into the apartment of a 38-year-old Bulgarian woman in Salwa and attempting to rape her, reports Al-Anba daily.

The arrest came after the victim filed a complaint with the Salwa Police Station accusing an unidentified person of breaking into her apartment armed with a knife, tearing off her clothes and attempting to rape her. However, he ran for his life after the woman screamed for help.

Investigations conducted by security men led to the arrest of the suspect. During interrogation he said he could not resist the woman because he saw her standing in the balcony of her home wearing see through clothes.

The complainant picked the suspect from a police legal line-up.


"Former Kuwaiti Criminal" - I'm sorry, but isn't attempted rape a crime also?  Maybe they meant, "A Kuwaiti who had committed past crimes."  Wonder what his previous record was?  Hmmmm.

And "... standing in the balcony of her home wearing see through clothes?"  Emmmm... Spanish Villas... You have to park your car, walk through an outside gate, through the complex, look around corners, pick your target....  It wasn't as if he was just waltzing down the street in Salwa, looked over at a temptress in transparent lingerie, and decided "Gee, I can't resist that.  I'm going to rape her."  yeah.  Good times.

Bulgarian girlfriend must be a strong cookie!  Good for her. It is humiliating enough to have to walk into ANY police station anywhere.  But then you have a language barrier.  And people staring at you with accusing eyes.  It just is NOT comfortable.  She probably just prevented future rapes.  You go, girl!  Thank you from your sisterhood community (the ones who choose to stand WITH her not against her.  Have you seen some of the ridiculous comments on Facebook made by WOMEN?  Where is the unity?  Sheeeeet - obviously they have no clue.)

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Brutal Sex Attack on European Woman in Spanish Villas, Salwa Block 10‏

Re-post from Ladies Who Do Lunch in Kuwait Blog
Salwa, Block 10, Kuwait, Tuesday May 10, 2016:

(Spanish Villas are residential complexes where many Westerners live.  I have never understood why people would make themselves targets by living in UNSECURED complexes inhabited completely by other Westerners.  It's an invitation to violence in this part of the world.)

A lady was brutally attacked in her home last Monday evening by a knife-wielding teenager. She was waiting for some cookies to finish in the oven and had opened the door of her home to let out smoke from her cigarette as she waited. She noticed a shadow outside and quickly realised it was a man who was fixated on her and masturbating. She screamed and moved towards the door to close and lock it but he made a lunge towards the door and try to push it open, she still had the cigarette in her hand and so burnt his neck to get him to back off. She closed the door and moved away from the door only to realise that she had not locked the door properly and the assailant opened the door and entered her home. He drew a small knife and tried to push her down and cut at her clothes. The female victim managed to overpower him and get away and raise the alarm. None of her neighbours or harris responded to her screams and door banging. Eventually the harris came out to see what all the commotion was but the attacker had fled the scene. The good news is he has been apprehended by police and identified, bad news is she feels terrified to go back to her apartment and the building management have denied her requests to have the outer doors locked for the residents protection or allow her to put a re-enforced door on her apartment (at her cost).  

We are also hearing of increasing incidents in Salwa area of maids being accosted by men in cars. 
Be aware, be cautious, lock doors and windows, keep curtains drawn at night, don't go near men calling you from cars, brief your kids and maids, scream, shout, fight and run away from any situations that seem inappropriate and dangerous. Always keep your phone with you if out walking and try to take a photo of car number plate if you can. If you have been attacked call police immediately as they will need to investigate and take prints ASAP. Always report incidents to police at your local station or call 112 if you need assistance. 

Source:  http://ladieswhodolunchinkuwait.blogspot.com/2016/05/brutal-sex-attack-on-european-woman-in.html


WAKE UP, KUWAIT!!!  This is now a violent country.

I recommend making home-made pepper spray and keeping it close to you.  There are many videos on how to make it (it's so easy!) online.  It may just save your life.

WARNING to Dog Owners in Kuwait!!!

Dog fighting is VERY prevalent in Kuwait.  Dog fights for betting usually take place in covert locations in the cooler months.

During several seasons in Kuwait (when it is hot), the monsters who fight dogs collect "bait dogs" which they can use to train their fighting dogs by desensitizing the them to killing other dogs.  Large breed dogs are typically taken.  There has been a string of mafia-style thefts of pets from yards,   houses, and beach chalets in the past several months. Reports come in daily.  (All in the video above are missing.)

DO NOT leave your dog unattended - even in the "safety" of your own locked yard - for a second. These thieves have probably already driven around your neighborhood, scoping out potential targets for theft.

If you have lost a pet, contact the following groups on Instagram IMMEDIATELY.  They send out a form of "Amber Alert" for pet owners:  @kareq8  @kareuq8 @help_the_animal @adopt_a_street_princess @kspathq8 @paws_kuwait

For pet lovers, animals are part of our family.  It is horrific to think of them being fought to the death for the enjoyment and material gain of demons walking among us.

KSPATH is the only licensed animal shelter and education center in Kuwait.  Please contact them to see what is being done officially to end this cycle.

Some of Kuwait's dog fight videos are on YouTube, but most are searched via Arabic.  If you want to get educated on dog fighting and its consequences, just do an internet search and be warned that you will see graphic photos.

Dog fighting is a breeding ground for other types of criminal activity like gambling, violence against women and children (as the fight dog owners are desensitized to violence), gun and drug use.  You wouldn't think that it would happen in a country like Kuwait, but it does.  It seems that there is an official blind eye when dogs go missing in the country;  it should be an indication to authorities that something is very wrong.

Sunday, May 08, 2016

Cute Pedigree German Shepherd Puppies for Sale

I'm posting this on behalf of a friend who breeds and shows (local and international) German Shepherds.  He takes quality care of his furry friends and for those who are looking for a great family pet (or a dog to bring up for show) -  here ya go.

The prices are very good and the dogs are pedigreed.  For information, please call EOT Kennel at 66730225.

Wednesday, May 04, 2016

Da Butt Post

I usually create titles like that to increase my page view stats.... But this time its for real. I wanna discuss butts in Kuwait.

Maybe I'm just not in tune with the rest of the world.  Maybe I don't watch enough music videos or YouTube clips.  I dunno.  I can only relate to my own back yard (get used to it, I'm going to pun the sh8T out of this post...).

Butts in Kuwait have become increasingly LARGE.  I'm not talking about your red-beans-and-rice kind of large butt; I'm talking about padonka-donk-plus-half-again size.  They big.  And they're out there.

I've had conversation with my "normal" female friends about this.  When the trend started, we just stared in disbelief.  'That can't be real. Is it?  Who would do that?  Why?' And then the realization set in...  it's happening.  Previously, the biggest butt I knew in Kuwait was Bu Teez.  I have had a hard time remembering his real name ever since he turned around and I realized that he had the largest backside I had ever seen.  It was like an Andersen window.  Maybe a bay window.

So, several years ago I'm at the beach with my half-neked group of sit-in-the-sea-all-day-drinking-and-peeing group.  I'm looking around and all the female types (they're not friends, they're not enemies, they're not acquaintances, they're not girls but not yet a woman, regardless of age) are hauling butt that is a whole lot bigger than it was the previous years.  (And I'm wondering where they bought the cute unikinis to go with the new looks.)  The butts are big, but they're tight for the most part - still "up North" where they should be.

I don't understand this particular form of body modification, but then I've never been really insecure about my parts to the point of asking someone to cut into me to change or rearrange them.  I figure love them or leave them. God gave it to me and bada bing. Ok, little nip/tucks here and there I agree with, but some of these procedures are completely changing the playing field (warned ya).

Since the several years ago and my pondering over why..... I've seen female types at parties, dancing like fertile monkeys in mating season.  I sh&t you not (and again).  It was like being at a weird strip club.  At least a dozen very large derrieres launched/hoisted into the air with heads to the floor; followed abruptly by a lot of bouncing around.  

Not much frightens me, but I had to leave; fearful of what might happen next; what might get burned into my memory.  The invitation was via  people I knew and (formerly) respected.  'Dude, your girlfriend is a ho.  Sorry, but you're like a brother and I tell it like it is.'

Is that what everybody wants now?  Has everything become so vulgar?  I don't get it.

Ok... back to the beach...

So this year (again, several years post-surgeries) the butts are back on the beach.  Only this time, all that fat injected in a target area of where it should be - has headed South; forming balls of travelling fat heading down their legs.  It looks like really, really bad cellulite.

As they were lathering up with baby oil and asking me why I am so white, I got all happy inside about my own circumstances (not that my butt is small, but average).   These are cute girl-women that are ruining their lives (cancer, deformities from cheap surgeries) and for what?  I would rather be a regular-looking old lady and skin-cancer free at 70/80.  I don't consider my butt an investment. And whatever their monkey-butts are attracting - they can keep!  The important part to any human is in the other region.

Sunday, May 01, 2016

Road Rage Kuwaiti Style

(Photo Credit:  Gulf News)

I drive a sports car.  Some man-children here don't like the fact that a female drives a sports car; like I'm a "bitch" with an attitude and I think that I'm better than them.  Or whatever.  I have just tried to figure out their silly little mindsets when they pull maneuvers like swerving in front of me trying to goad me into racing.  Or getting really close on my bumper trying to get me to go faster.

Case in point:  other day - I'm on a 1-lane off ramp and JeepMonkey is inches from my back bumper.  There is no room for him to get around.  There aren't any other cars around.  So, I speed up.  JeepMonkey gets his panties in a wad because (what exactly?)  It doesn't end there because he's a roid-tard and has to get in front of me and try to slam on his brakes (meanwhile, almost causing several accidents with cars in front of me).  Then, as I pull out my mobile phone and start taking videos of his antics, he puts his window down and tells me to pull over.

Aaaah... this is classic Kuwait road rage.  Pull over to "talk".

F no!  I'm not pulling over.  I'm not putting my window down.  I saw someone refuse to "talk" one time and the driver of the other car threw hot coffee at the other driver's closed window.  What would have happened if it had been opened...  (As I'm mouthing the words to "go have intimate relations with yourself" at him. - that is only a 40KD ticket by the way.  So is flippin the bird.) And you are a creep that I would never hold a discussion with.  So he continues his freakshow as I continue to gather photo evidence with my cell phone. Eventually, other drivers are in danger and are starting to get pissed off at him, so he flees.  (As a woman, if there had been an accident and we went to the police station, I could have filed a case against him which may end in 6 months in jail for chasing me.)

This is the way road rage is handled here.  Pull over to talk ends with street fights.  (Note that these incidents usually don't involve a woman.  However, there are a lot of non-men lately, so perhaps.)

Here is the incident that prompted me to post:
Coming home from dinner on Blajaat Street.  2 idiots in a (chick) Mercedes were holding up traffic consistently - all the way down the street - talking to a girl next to them. (OMG!  Just give her the number and MOVE!)  We were right next to them.  The guy behind the Merc was really upset because he couldn't get around him and had to put up with his abrupt stops.  The Merc stopped abruptly; and the Suzuki behind bumped him.  The Merc dude jumped out  (all pumped up like a rooster) with his passenger/friend (show for the girl?).  The Suzuki dude made the mistake of getting out of his car...  And that's when the Merc driver hit him in the face.  The passenger didn't do anything.  An innocent bystander walking by tried to intervene and stop him.  He almost got hit as well.  Even dude's friend (the passenger) couldn't calm him down and you could hear them shouting at each other.

Here is the thing: Stay in your car.  Lock the doors. Keep the windows up.  Take out your cell phone and start videoing the assailant and his license plate number.  Call the po-po (who won't arrive in time to help you, but you will have the video and can use that as evidence).

Who invites violence?  I don't get it.  You would think this would be common sense.  You can't talk sense with a crazy person.  They're crazy.  People have knives and are tweakin on meth.  WTF.  Even teenagers are killing each other lately [few days ago in Sabah Al-Salem.  A 18 year old Kuwaiti kid stared at (or spit on - depends on the version) a 16 year old Kuwaiti kid, so the 18 year old stabbed him to death] .

Kuwait isn't the safe place it was before.  Watch your 6 out there.