Tuesday, April 07, 2009

How to pick up chicks in Kuwait



Go to a chicken farm. Ha ha. (A Desert Girl Early Tribute to Easter)

Ok, I had a serious question from a military guy (who is lucky enough to leave post once in a while). He sounds like a very decent kind of guy and wanted to know how to talk to Arab women.

He said that he and his friends have been scared into believing that they would go to jail if they dared to chat with one of the ladies, so even if the ladies are overt in initiating contact - they don't even make eye contact. Desert Girl says BULLSHIT. I’ll get to this point in a minute….

I think that many of the military’s policies are alarmist, written by people on 2-year tours who take home with them absolutely nothing about the culture or country in which they were stationed. I think it is sad. You go thousands of miles from home and all you hear is how NOT to get to know the society. It is kind of like the blind leading the blind.

People like me who have lived and worked in Kuwait for years rarely have the opportunity to talk to military people about Kuwait and the culture. I try – honestly. I try to speak to decision makers at every opportunity and get them to see Kuwait – from someone who has first-hand knowledge. The top brass is often too busy to get off the base to see the real Kuwait also; These are hard-working guy. I have a hard time leaving my office and I don’t have to have an escort with me. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be for a general to just drive around and check things out; or for that matter, to integrate at all into society here. (Write to me – I would be honored to show you the real Kuwait and introduce you to people who would take you to weddings, diwaniyas, cultural events.)

The military in Kuwait doesn’t have any programs where people like me can talk to soldiers and tell our stories - at least make people feel more comfortable living/working in their host country. They probably won’t because I assume that everything would have to be scripted – defeating the purpose. I would love to do a 1-on-1 Q&A session with a group of soldiers, honestly.

If you’ve ever been to any of the PXs on the bases here, you will see that the soldiers aren’t even offered real Kuwaiti goods: they get plastic trinkets from India at 10 times their value. That is so sad! Kuwait has so much to offer!

This is why membership to AUSA is very important. Kuwaiti people – join and help a soldier learn about your country! Membership is so cheap – I think it is like 9KD for individuals and 50 KD for a corporate membership. AUSA is an organization that supports troop activities, morale, and events (in a nutshell). It is also just plain good business to be involved with them.

I have thought about trying to start up a book donation to provide books on Kuwait to the MRW sites; especially at Ali Al-Salem where the troops transition in and out of Kuwait and are often waiting around for their plane home. I don’t know if I can do this, but again, I’m going to try.

Anyhoo… after my incessant ramblings… back to how to meet Arab women (those who want to meet you – and I’ll tell you how to determine that below).

Yeah yeah yeah… I’ll get backlash from people saying, “Haram – Moslem women don’t date, yada yada.” Uh yeah – many do. Some or many don't. By the by, Moslem MEN aren't supposed to date either, but don't tell me that they're not. Some don’t. Some Christian ladies don’t date either. Some do. So what? Humans are humans no matter where you go. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

Going back to MY personal experience; many of MY Arab female friends are quite willing to get to know (maybe not date, but establish friendships) with American men. What’s the problem? My Kuwaiti friend, Mona, has a beautiful 23 year old daughter and she told me that she wouldn’t mind her daughter marrying an American man – as long as he’s Moslem. Hey – things are a’changin in Kuwait. Kuwaiti men have been marrying foreign women for years. Get over it.

Ok, Kuwaiti dudes I knew in the US found that the fastest way to learn about American culture and language was through their American girlfriends. Full circle.

Rambling again. Ok…. The key to any relationship in Kuwait is discretion. This is particularly true of the initial meeting. You ab-so-lutely can NOT walk up to an Arab woman and start talking to her as you would in the States/West. “Hi. You have a beautiful smile. I was wondering if you would like to have coffee with me sometime.” SMACK! No, no, noooooooo!!!! Youse can’t do that here. You have to take what you have learned in the States as appropriate behavior and twist it. Why? Because if someone saw her talking to a strange man in public, she would be viewed as a bad girl, a tramp, a ho, a skankyass mall whore. If her family members saw you talking to her, they would get mad because you had just inadvertently insulted their sister and therefore their family/tribe/ancestors. You get the point.

So, what do you do? Desert Girl's Method of Approach in 3 easy-to-follow steps (not yet available in stores):

Step 1 – Direct Eye Contact

First, DIRECT EYE CONTACT. People stare here. It’s what they do. It’s cultural. But for a man to make direct eye contact with a woman (et vice-versa) implies something personal. If she holds the eye contact and/or smiles – you can proceed to step 2). If she gives you a dirty look (spits, says something), then obviously it’s off.

Step 2 – The Smile

Look around, make sure that no one is looking, and give her a smile. If she smiles back or signals in some way that it is ok to proceed, go to Step 3

Step 3 – The Exchange

This is where you have to be really discreet. There are several mediums for making the number exchange (well, actually just giving her yours) and it should happen quickly so that no one sees you:

Bluetooth (high-tech) Method. Bluetooth is very common in Kuwait. Not only are people everywhere in Kuwait at coffee shops for a cup o’ Joe, but they are also there to meet. It is like a virtual bar – without alcohol and with virtual conversation. You will know when there is a lot of Bluetooth activity when you see people scrambling to send messages on their phone every few minutes. Get to know your phone before you set out to Bluetooth - figure out how to send/receive messages. (Do NOT create a catchy picture on your computer with your phone number. Broadcasting is just tacky.) First, set your Bluetooth nickname to a number that you can show her on one hand, like “3” for example. When she looks at you, look at your phone (or pick it up and “show” it to her) and then signal with 3 fingers that you are number “3” on the list of Bluetooth names. She will send you a Bluetooth note and you should respond by sending her your number. You can probably write a note ("Notes" feature on Nokias) to keep on your phone that says something like, "Hi. I'm John. You have beautiful eyes. (not "nice ass, babe") Please call me at 555-1234." DONE.

Paper (conventional) Method. Write your number on a small piece of paper. Making sure no one is watching, flick it, drop it, leave it on her table while passing. Again – never ever engage in conversation. This would be considered insulting.

(If you see where she has parked), phone number/note on her car window. This should be small and descriptive of who you are. This is a more impersonal approach and may not get as good results as the high-tech and conventional methods.

Ok, so if she is interested, fer sure she’ll call you. A woman will never ever give her number to you first or on the first meeting – it would imply that she’s a tramp (this mentality is changing a bit).

After she calls, you will probably talk for a long time before you actually meet. You should use a lot of flowery, compliments. Anything over-the-top will make you a superstar. Closer: If you actually buy her or send her flowers (all you need is her phone number and flower dudes will deliver. Check out Kuwait Flowers online service) she would probably loveyoulongtime. You take it from there, but just remember that where ever you do meet, you should be discreet about it so that her reputation isn’t harmed in any way/you might inadvertently insult her. That includes letting HER make the first move - if at all. You don’t want to take her to someplace that her brother goes all the time so you don’t get your ass kicked and put in jail. That would be bad. At that point, the military would use you as an example and screw up the lives of countless other people for years to follow (like that soldier from Louisiana in 2005 who got caught in a car with a Kuwaiti girl by her brothers and tried to outrun them and the police down to Arifjan - didn't work out so well for him).

Now, there are other mediums in Kuwait for meeting ladies: Try any of the online dating services: http://www.friendfinder.com/, http://www.adultfriendfinder/ (kinda kinky, but dayam - if there aren't a lot of local folk on thar!), http://www.kiss.com/, http://www.plentyoffish.com/, http://www.khitba.com/, www.armysingles.com, www.qitba.com (Moslem marriage). Kuwaitis don’t post pictures (again, the discretion/honor thing), and neither will most Arab women, but if you are okay with posting yours, you will get more responses.

Are there questions, gentlemen? If so, just write to me and we'll see if we can't get it sorted out.

2015 Update

Bluetooth is no longer an option.  Nobody uses it anymore because everyone has a smart phone with apps:   chat sites like Instagram and WhosHere where you can just scan to see who is in your area - and see their photos.  Paper exchange of phone numbers is still on.


This is the highest-viewed post I have with over 38,000 views.

81 comments:

liliuokalani said...

O_O................

nyx said...

Oh! This is right on.. so damn right on. I meant the pick up lines and methods.

The US Armed Forces are confined to their bases owing to the many brawls they have been getting into. One such incident was reported in Arab times or the Kuwait times when a Lt. was charged to have opened fire near Marina Mall some time back after getting involved in a motor vehicle accident. Needless to say, to protect both, Locals / Civilians and the Allied Forces, General Orders prohibit them from moving around Kuwait for recreational purposes while on Active Duty. However the very same order doesnt apply to the Armed Forces in Bahrain, Qatar or Oman. As a matter of fact; they are even allowed to consume alcohol not exceeding a certain quantity during R&R spanning 3 days.

Anonymous said...

I know why people don't comment here... cause you do not follow up

Desert Girl said...

NYX - You don't know how many times I have opened fire on people in traffic.... in my mind. Ok, dude is my hero - regardless of what happened!!!! LOOOL.

My friend saw a Ferrari cut off a US officer with an armed escort once in front of the Kuwait Towers. They caught up with Ferrari dude at a light and drew an M16 on him. I replay that in my mind too...

Nina said...

I wanna meet ur friend! im Arab LOL..

I think those techniques are great for Kuwaiti women maybe...i am egyptian and i would prefer the direct approach....

Nosayba said...

LOL. Oh God. Your post made me laugh.

Put aside the fact that I don't date guys (nor girls for what it's worth), I think I've been too buried inside my college books to notice all the updates happening in the ways guys approach girls over here. (Not Kuwaiti, but lived all my life here). When I used to notice, it was only numbers being thrown in my way on small pieces of paper -- simply ignored might I add.

I don't spit, but I do give the despising shame-on-you look;) I believe that such behavior rather indicates a great deal of immaturity and irresponsibility in a man. If I decide to take a guy's number -EVER-, I will call him later on that night to ask the following: Hello there, Avenues guy with green T-shirt and spikey hair? So..tell me, what do you think are the risks of globalizatoin and how do they affect the current financial crisis?.. Just for a gig! :p I mean COMEON, what am I supposed to say? Flirt with someone I don't know who has probably passed his contact info to 15 other girls that night; who has been flirting around all day, aimlessly? I can't play that chic!

Nina lol. I know both a Kuwaiti & an Egyptian chic who've been engaged to an American & a Canadian, respectively, only to break-up eventually. Too many cultural barriers, they say! So be careful, choose carefully, hehe.

Desert Girl said...

Nosayba - you totally cracked me up this morning! I'm laughing at my desk. I haven't met many men lately who would be able to answer your question on the risks of globalization - regardless of how, when, where you meet them. ... and I'm talking chairmen and CEO's round here! SAAAAAD. Thanks for commenting. I loved it.

Feras said...

I hope your post isn't taken too seriously, and shame on you to encourage such actions, i've hated going out for the past few years becuase of the ridiculousness i see on the streets and in malls, all of which have been described in your guide on "how to pick up chicks in kuwait". these actions have gone overboard in this country, i'm not against dating, i'm against how it's done. and how ppl think that it's a god given right to go out and try to pick up every girl that walks/drives by, and if they don't give in to their pursuit, then there's hell to pay. but there was this one part which i found quite disturbing,
"My Kuwaiti friend, Mona, has a beautiful 23 year old daughter and she told me that she wouldn’t mind her daughter marrying an American man – as long as he’s Moslem. Hey – things are a’changin in Kuwait. Kuwaiti men have been marrying foreign women for years. Get over it."

yes things are changing, and kuwaiti men and women have been marrying foreign partners, but this doesn't mean that religion is changing, so no, she can't get over it, religion clearly states that a muslim man can marry a non muslim woman, but a muslim woman absolutely cannot marry a non muslim man, i don't want to get into too much detail on why it's that way, but you can email me if you are interested to know, (i'm assuming you have no clue, or else you wouldn't say that "get over it" comment)

I feel sorry for the person that prints the post and actually uses it at the avenues tonight, cuz if you need help trying to pick up a chick,then arab chicks are the least of your problems. i have many western friends that work here in kuwait, who haven't complained.. each person will find their opportunity.

putting that aside, i'd love to show american troops what Kuwait really is, this beautiful little country with great culture and an amazing maritime history, i've done it before and i'm willing to do it again, but i wont pay an organisation to join, and do all the work, if you ask me, they're the ones that should be paying ppl for the great service they are offering the troops. but anyway, if you know of anyone that would like to see what kuwait is all about, nothing excluded, i'll be glad to help out, because i'm all with educating ppl about this wonderful place... peace.

down2erth@hotmail.com

Anonymous said...

Hey! I'm a Kuwaiti married to an American man for 4 years now and life couldn't be better which i'm very thankful for. The approach was more or less what you described but coming from an American man who does not normally do that is so cute considering he is making an effort but from a Kuwaiti man its too lame. Dunno thats just my 2 cents.

Desert Girl said...

Feras - everyone is entitled to your own opinion. Shame on me? Pardonez moi, but I don't really care. If people ask me, I tell it like it is - as I am attempting to do. It isn't like there are any other ways to make friends or meet people in this country. If you have another perspective and would like to add it - by all means, do so (preferably on your own blog).

It isn't like people are going to meet in church the way that "decent folk" do in the US.

Who is "complaining" as you stated? I was asked a question and answered.

As for your concern about, "religion clearly states that a muslim man can marry a non muslim woman, but a muslim woman absolutely cannot marry a non muslim man" - did I not just say 'AS LONG AS HE IS MUSLIM??????' I didn't spell it your way, again, pardonez moi.

GET OVER IT.

Desert Girl said...

Anonymous - Good for you and thank you for your comment! I hope you always have a happy life together.

Desert Girl said...

Oh by the way, Feras, I didn't say for men to go out and chase women down the street - I believe I was quite direct in stating (Step 1) if she is interested in the guy. I don't believe in the bulldog tactics a lot of KUWAITI boys use these days. But wait... wasn't this post for... WESTERN guys????

nYx said...

Feras:
Fulla shit budd! Wake up and check your "6"! You'd be amazed as to how Kuwait has evolved since you last were in your cave mate!

george said...

WHoaa....you really say it like you see it DG. Actually it is an eye opener for many, including moi, who have no clue to the mysterious dating cultures here. Good job.

Anonymous said...

Why would any guy go after a hijab wearing virgin when there are plenty of normal Western girls available?

RET Officer said...

nyx,

US Forces are not confined to their bases because of brawls.

Stop talking. You don't know what you are talking about.

DG,

Watch out when promoting AUSA. AUSA has a horrible name with teh troops it supposededly exists to serve. Really, AUSA is resented by the majority of US troops as they are often extorted by commanders to "donate".

While the Kuwait chapter does good deeds overall, AUSA as a whole only exists to provide income to retired senior officers and NCOs and to pander for defense corporations. Itis really nothing more than legal extortion. Check some militray related discussion boards if you care to verify.

Incidentally, the Kuwait AUSA chapter was started by an outstanding individual who has since moved on.

Be careful who you associate with. don't just drink the Kool-Aid without examining who is servibg it. There are known corrupt individual and companies using AUSA Kuwait and the auspices of the American Embassy and Expat community and to hide their illegal and corrupt bad deeds. (Hint.. laundry contract and others)

Desert Girl said...

RET Officer: Thanks for the tips and I will do just that. Everything I have personally seen from AUSA's Kuwait Chapter has been above board and I wouldn't be associated with them if they weren't.

I've had the "opportunity" to make a quick buck here more than once and I choose not to go that route. Ever. "If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters."

Now, I have problems with the American Business Council - specifically because the treasurer has been in office for many years and that alone is bad. There is no room for checks and balances.

I know who you are talking about and from the paragraph above, you know I know.

Not to worry, I never drink anything that is mixed by those I don't know well.... :)

RET Officer said...

Interesting blog you have here.

I refuse to join the ABC for the same reason you have a problem with it. Bloodsuckers like that need to be exposed and shamed in public.

IMO, the case with many "organizations" is that they often exist to line the pockets of certain people while doing very little to actually promote the cause or stakeholders they claim to serve. In reality these organizations are no different than a mob protections racket.

Until people wise up and demand regulation of these extorting oragniaztions and individuals, it's up to the individual to peel away the veneer of an organization to determine if an organization actually carries out what it claims to do and expose these "leeches of business".

I'll get off my pulpit now.

Anonymous said...

what about how to pick up guuuuuys in kuwait...

Blue-is-the-color said...

Interesting read but I wonder when it will become more normal

Timmy said...

Hi,

Interesting piece!

I am moving to Kuwait soon for a year. Where are the best places to meet Ex-pat women?

I don't like the sound of getting a kicking for trying to talk to a local girl. Besides I don't think I would be very popular with local women.

Desert Girl said...

How to pick up guys in Kuwait:
1) Be female
2) Breathe
SO EASY. Actually #1 is probably not necessary. Come to think of it, neither is 2.

How to meet expat women in Kuwait: Join expat groups (Social or business). I will send anyone the list who asks. Walk up to one and say something nice and ask her if you can give her your number.

The Father said...

and that is exactly why living here sucks! because of what Feras said. !

you can't go and have fun without being like stripped out of your clothes with weird looks and sniper, thermal vision eyes.
it sucks!

and yea, i hate this thing about the direct eye contact and staring, it even makes foreign people a weird feeling if you smile at their faces if being just nice in a cafe or something..
weird..

Edi said...

Just one thing to add:

Make your phone number part of the bluetooth name for the phone.

Nokia 6233 9xxx-yyyy for example.

Or 3......9xxx-yyyy to following your number example. This reduces the amount of time and the number of passes to hook up. Nokias also have software that allows you to publically share a directory on your phone with pics, quips, or whatever.

I have colleagues who have cards printed en masse to drop on tables as they walk by. Not my cup of tea, but knowledge is power.

Anonymous said...

Besides the Indian and Filipino women which are very obvious; how can you tell what nationality an woman in kuwait is and are there vastly different approaches to talking to these many different ladies?

Anonymous said...

Ok, so I have 2 dates with this gorgeous girl I met online. They both went well, at least I think. The problem is I don't really know where to go from here. Back home, I would just take her to a bar and when we are both "comfortable" enough, make a move. Not possible here (nothing to get comfortable with!!). I think she's into me. But I'm not really sure. My devious plan would be to invite her to my apartment for dinner and see how that goes. But I'm a bit worried she'll think that it's a bit sleavy on my part. Any ideas? PS Dating is hard work without alcohol!!

Desert Girl said...

Anonymous 3:29 pm:
Why don't you take her to a movie and then hold hands and do romantic shit like that? :D. I would just talk to her - tell her the truth; that you're not really sure how to handle the next step over here. Ok, that might sound a little wussy. Maybe not. Maybe just ask her if she'd like to have dinner at your place. What is the worst she can say? No? Sleazy depends on how you approach it. Good luck and I expect an invitation to the wedding. (Howz that for making a man nervous? tee hee!)

Anonymous said...

Did that, went to the movies for second date, held hands eventually after I got rid of the annoying chips.

What other kind of romantic "shit" do you have in mind? :-)

So, I think I'll just go for it, as you said what's the worst that could happen, right?

PS the movie, angels and demons was a big dissappointment! Especially because of the amount of bits that were cut out.

Dominic said...

Hi there,
I am a guy who could be moving up to Kuwait from Australia for work and was wondering how easy it is to find a female partner without having to get married. The usual avenues of online dating look a bit dead and bars are out of the question! Is there a place where western singles can hang out without significant dramas or percecution?

donjuandekuwait said...

lool.. isn't that old school! am kuwaiti and what u saying is funny! what r u anyway!!!

razif said...

wow!! so interisting place.. can i came together?...

Renju said...

DG.. nice post and informative..
But this will only happen to you westerners only ( You have mentioned it).If the guys is Asian, then there wont be any looks or xchange or anything..Only Police will be there..

Anonymous said...

havnt asked urself , before answering or enlightning ur mr stupid soldier , that why the hell at the first place ur HERE IN KUWAIT , what the heck are those freaking troops doin in kuwait thousands of miles away from ur misrable country , go back to ur rednecks cowboys country and pick whatever chicks u want in dozens..wherever u see an american he has to act like A GODFATHER and start braging. this is what need, americans intefere in our daily activities !! how to waer our undies etc ect !! go find a man or women or whatever instead of this misrable life.

Desert Girl said...

Sometimes I let buttholes in here to comment just so I can either make fun of them or let others do it for me. I find particular hilarity in the "go back to your country" ones.

Anonymous 1:40 - The troops were invited here by the Kuwaiti Government. I assume that is your government. The Kuwaiti government gave both the camps of Arifjan and the US Embassy in Bayan were both generous gifts of the Kuwaiti Government. If you have a problem with foreign policy, perhaps you should take it up with your government. Write to them. Post comments on your own blog.

As for Americans interfering with your "daily activities" I am guessing that you do not mean correcting your English...

Anonymous said...

Hi, you are right on about the fact that there are Kuwaiti girls and other Arab girls who will date American guys. Many of them will date Americans for the basic reason of their not being Kuwaiti. If they date a Kuwaiti and he spreads the word around (very common) their reputation is ruined. If they date an American, the chance of that word being spread around is minimal. They will definitely be careful, however.

Anonymous said...

Do any of you have any website link to any chat room or places online where I can meet a Kuwaiti female?

One of the guy mentioned that he met one online and went out with her twice? I wonder how did it fo for him?

Any ideas?

Anonymous said...

Hi DG,

you talk about American men, but what about expat men from the Subcontinent? I'm a British Asian been in Kuwait for just under a year now, and its pretty hard to get any response from Kuwaiti/Arab women!

...how do they view us blokes?

Cheers,
Nas

Anonymous said...

Sunu Decuta here - DG -great postings and blog. I learnt a lot. Thank you. you need to be smart both culturally and apply common sense. I wish everyone the best and good luck with finding a partner.

pick up lines for girls said...

Love your blog.

Anonymous said...

loooool its really funy how you know that much about " "How to pick up chicks in Kuwait"
you really know much about the chicks in kuwait .. Deplorable condition ;P

GB said...

I dont think the discretion noted in this article applies anymore now that its 2011! :) (dont ask me how I found myself in this old article) Especially for a local with a foreigner, I think everyone is okay that a Kuwaiti is just helping them see the country and have a good time here. I, a Kuwaiti girl, have gone out to restaurants and malls with Americans guys who have been visiting the country. And I DO come from those Kuwaiti circles where everyone knows everyone, reputation is your life, and public appearance has to be at its best and most polished--all the damn time. Many saw me with those Americans, I have even introduced them to each other. This, however, does not apply with fellow Kuwaiti guys. Thats still a big no-no.

Anyhow, be the judge here and if the girl seems willing just go up to her and introduce yourself!

katwoman said...

I just had to say that the other day I was out with my husband and his male co-worker and a Jordanian girl came up to him and said he was beautiful and asked for his number...it really surprised me because she was in the full black hijab attire...except the face covering. Guess things are changing as some of the blogs hinted at.

Rodman said...

Hi, This blog is completely real.. i being an expat born in Kuw has dated a kuwaiti girl for over a year n half... she by far was the best gurl i have ever met... all the charms in her were so princess like.. so its all worth the risk and adventure to find a charming princess..

Desert Boy said...

I just got in country and am still a babe in the woods, especially driving around, I still use my turn signal and the speed limit. I drove through Kabul with less fear than here. I want a date with you DG. Let me know.

Anonymous said...

Easy... get a muscle car, pull over and ask her for a ride... if you've already got a 4x4 just through your mobile phone out of the window in hope that the girl will pick it up... otherwise there are still plenty of shopping malls where you can run after chicks.... as explained before: drop a paper or bluethooth her ;-) Good luck!

PS: To the Aussie guy.. hope ur still in the wonderful land of OZ... no reason at all for you to come over here :o))

Anonymous said...

Just came across your blog DG.

A great read.

I'm here in KU for just one week from London visiting friends.

My heart stopped when I saw a couple of beautiful Bedouin girls.

However, I am happily married this past 15 yearslol.
David S

abdul aziz said...

DESERT GIRLS T_T
LOOK IM Kuwait and if you go to marina you'll see EMO if you go to avenues you'll see BARBIES!!! >.<

bluenest99 said...

Well...nice technique, but what you mentioned is for americans. what chance to non-arab(indians)stand. Any other ways for an indian? What do you suggest?

bluenest99@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

Hey
Could you please share the link of the xpat social and business networking?

I'm new in Kuwait from Canada and I'd like to meet some westerners.

Thank you!

CandyHome said...

Wow! I guess you are doing well in kuwait. Chicks! anyway I think there are soooo many misunderstandings here. I do not know from where you gained your knowledge about us, kuwaiti females. But I really appretiate your point of view. I hope you'll find your "chick".

Desert Girl said...

Hi CandyHome.

I'm female; been here for 15 years. Many of my female friends are Kuwaiti.

This was in response to questions I've received from Western guys on how to meet Kuwaiti women. If you would like to relate other ways, I'm sure they'd love to hear it. :)

Desert Boy said...

hi, i'm in the armed forces just want to ask what are some decent restaurants in kuwait. when i say decent i meant the food. i really don't care about how the place looks and it has to be non-american food if you know what i mean..
-Eddie

Anonymous said...

What an interesting Blog lol...
I used to live in Kuwait, but I have been living in Canada for a good 16 years now, back briefly visiting my dad, most of my friends from ASK are MIA or just lost touch...it has been 16 years. I would love to share my contact info, If your down to chill, or do something border line Alcohol related "within the law of course :P" email me at approved@hotmail.ca and ill be happy to share guys, girls whatever, Im bored!! here until april 11! cheers

YoureAllChodes said...

Ok let me just say one thing. If any of you believe this BS then not only will you never be able to get a girl, but you will probably become such hermits that the closest you'll get to a girl is Internet xxx vids.

That being said, me and my friends regularly approach women out here just like we would in any other country, and contrary to what was said above, and popular belief, it's actually a lot easier to meet women out here when you're blunt because as a woman told me just yesterday, "wow, I have never had a man just come up to me and talk to me like you before", and we're going out on a date this weekend.

C'mon boys, step it up, don't be chodes. Talk to women.. They don't bite.

Anonymous said...

Omg lol I don't know what to say and how to say this , but I'm actually a kuwaiti citizen and I hate kuwait women they are so hateful and cocky and ugly , I want to meet an american woman because they are soo cute and sooo humble like they dont know that they're cute I adore them <3 so adorable but this is so sad I dont know how to meet them here in public and I'm so afraid that I get rejected by one of them ;((( actually I dont mind marrying an American woman as long as I love her and she do because my dad say it's better actually to marry an american woman because American women know how to love and they're faithful , please I want to meet one here in Kuwait i need help , my email : Virtuosity2010@hotmail.com Please help me anyone .......

Harold Johnson Jr said...

I jst read ur reply about picking up chicks in kuwait. I've been in Kuwait for years and haven't really seen anything here. I would really like to see what there is to Kuwait before I leave , because who knows if I will ever see Kuwait again.my email is bamaduke80@yahoo.com. If u can or can point me in the right direction will be appreciated. Thank u

David said...

Desert Girl,

I like your approach. Where is the best location to meet women? I have been to Kuwait twice on business and still haven't figured it out.

Dave
spanky438@yahoo.com

David said...

Desert Girl,

I like your approach. Where is the best location to meet women? I have been to Kuwait twice on business and still haven't figured it out.

Dave
spanky438@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

Man o man, I guess comming to Kuwait will Be allot different than Canada lol it's true what they say you don't appreciate what you have till it's gone! I guess I'm gonna miss the nightlife, drinks, beaches, bars and cool friends!
If there's an event or anything like the western World.
Email me Swiss_Ferrari@yahoo.com

ilk stein said...

Its really sad that Im kuwaiti and googling on how to pick up girls in kuwait to find a valid reply. Bluetooth do people still do that? I asked some of my friends on how to pick up girls in kuwait all I got are old folk tales of bluetooth,mir and lately twitter how does it work?
P.s I dont recommend dating kuwaiti chicks because here its all about who you know and I unfortunatly know of people who are well connected and are just looking for trouble and a reason to use their connections. Good luck and good hunting

Anonymous said...

Good read, being here since six months..i am yet to figure out the best place where those pretty open beauties come in.. pls throw some light
123thinkeasy@gmail.com

fun AM guy said...

Great post, the tactics you described sound very plausable.


I have been in Kuwait for only about a month now and i dont claim to be an expert, My own experence has been a bit different though.

I was out one night at a shisha bar I found near my house, and was just relaxing a bit after work one night. a song came on that I liked and because I also like to sing I started to sing not like crazy loud or anything but since i didnt have anyone near me it wasn't too low either. I guess i got carried away and got louder at a certain point because i noticed a group of women beginning to giggle and look my way. Not wanting to cause any problems I stopped singing since I was unsure of how this would be taken. after a few moments I looked over and a few of them were looking and smiling so i figured everyting was ok. when i got up to use the restroom one of the ladies told me that they liked the way that i sang to which i said thankyou and continued to the restroom. On the way back to my table they stopped me again and asked if i would like to join them. I american and have been to several countries throught asia and europe and I love to learn about different cultures so being invited to sit at a table with 6-7 women some of most of which were wearing the hajaab (excuse the spelling) seemed like a once in a lifetime chance to interact with the women face to face. after talking with them for awhile i learned that they were a mother and her 2 daughters and a some freinds who liked to come to shisha regularly which i thought was awesome a mom taking hanging out with her daughters. after about 2 hours of talking we all left and it was all good. 2 weeks later i seen the mother and daughters at another shisha bar that was across the road from the last one and again they invited me to sit with them and we talked for some time, but this time when one of the daughters left to go to the bathroom i asked the mother if it would be ok if i asked the daughter for her phone number and to my suprise she said yes along with some strict rules on calling and even stricter rules on not thinking of a relationship beyond friends, which was fine since then i have hungout with the daughter a few more times always in public always with a group and with the mothers approval. we are hitting it off really well and i dont know if there is anything there to push it any farther but if that time comes i will be sure to ask to talk with her mother about anything more. i guess its not really dating but it is possible to meet women here if you just have the proper respect for women that i think you should be giving them no matter what their religion or where it is you meet them

Nina Cenalicious said...

Love your rules on how to meet girls here in kuwait, on the other hand now I realized why American/European guys act like they're not into Arab girls as most of em date Asian girls only I didn't know they were afraid of jail lol... As Kuwaiti girl I do find American guys are sweet & cool a bit more open than locals & girls here don't mind dating em.

Yuri24 said...

although its strict in kuwait, i think its better that women are highly respected. yes americans date filipinas and other asians but some get overboard and disrespectful. its also best to start from friendship before dating to get to know the person and develops into love and marriage later on.its applicable to any race

Anonymous said...

Pss desert girl r u free this 21st

Anonymous said...

Pss desert girl r u free this 21st

Anonymous said...

So judging by the chain of comments, it's looked down upon for even thinking of talking to women.

I've been here for over 6 months and truth is I have never in my life met more ignorant and rude people. Almost every coutry I've been to (And I've traveled a lot) I've always made friends and still stay in touch, but it seems Kuwait is the stopping ground.

I accepted the long term contract job here because I thought it would be similar to the rest of the hospitable and friendly Arab coutries, such as Jordan, UAE and Lebanon. If I try speaking to a female there's always a confrontation between the employees or others and me. If I attempt to talk to other men they blow me off as well. Even the 3 friends I have made rarely hang out since they're married.

So here is a question, if I can't talk to women and can't talk to men, then who can I talk to? I can speak Arabic and have no issues making friends elsewhere...
And how does an expat guy in Kuwait find a gf/wife that is not Philipino or Ethiopean? Let alone how does a single guy make friends?

Any advice would be appreciated

Desert Girl said...

Anonymous 30 Aug:
Send me an e-mail to my account at amerab@gmail.com. I would rather tell you the real scoop there.

In addition, get yourself involved in activities with Kuwaitis. There are so many groups on Facebook and Instagram. What hobbies do you like? Hunt around for groups that do the same. There are expat groups that do parties (write to me) and activities. With the holiday season coming up in a few months, there will be a lot of things to do.

And as for meeting someone who isn't from the nationalities you mentioned, follow my advice on the post. If you aren't being discreet about how you approach a woman (mainly Arab women), you will for SURE have a problem. You have to be super-sensitive not to let anyone see you. It's all about eye contact.

Try the dating sites. OMG everybody in Kuwait is on there now:
WhosHere (for smart phones)
(Do a Google search for dating sites in Kuwait - there are lots). If you list yourself as a foreign guy who speaks Arabic, you'll get a lot of attention).



cory cooper said...

I am an American white male, and I went to the Avenues mall today, I had 3 different women make direct eye contact, get their friends attention, wave and say HI to me, I wave back, they would giggle or smile and that's that. I was reluctant to go talk to them or wave them over for this exact reason lol, Now I know for next time :D btw, they were all covered in their veils...so i was shocked when they all waved and said hi. I blew the last one a kiss and she said omg and waved at her face as if it was a fan lol! I made her day I believe.

Nosayba El-Sayed said...

It's funny how I left a comment here more than 5 years ago and I still receive notifications of subsequent comments. I've been living in Canada for the past 4 years though so I'm not sure how the trends in Kuwait have or have not changed. Either way, I want to leave a quick comment for white american male, mr. cooper: I'm glad you found it 'shocking' that those women in veils waved at you and responded to your flirtation. This means you have some sort of association back in your head between wearing a veil and being modest - more or less. I'd like to confirm that conceptually this should be the case. One of the main purposes of wearing a veil is the preservation and expression of modesty. The essence of a hijab goes beyond a simple headcover. It is part of a social system where objectification and sexualization of women is rejected, the intellectual value of a woman is emphasized, and means of toning down hypersexuality in a society are pursued. It's a system designed to promote and encourage modesty and preserve family values. Not well implemented in many muslim countries, unfortunately, but these are some headlines of the conceptual framework behind it. So yes, please stay SHOCKED at what you're observing in practice.

It saddens me to see this beauty behind the essence of the veil butchered by this evidently 'culturally' worn veils..
Cheers.

Desert Girl said...

Nosayba -

Thanks for your comment and while that is all good and well - in theory - the practical application of the veil is multi-level and does not always lean towards a religious purpose.

I'm not speaking on behalf of all women who wear hijab, but I can say that everyone is different and different people have different reasons for wearing it. Some are because their families insist on it. Some because they started wearing hijab early and then found it difficult to stop wearing (if they want to).

You can't make a generalization that every woman who wears hijab is modest.

... in the same way that you can't say that every woman who wears tight jeans is looking to attract sexual attention. (and I've seen plenty of mahajibat wearing both the veil and tight jeans).

The world changes. Cultures change. What saddens you may be the norm for another. Its perspective.

My person experience has been that in 99.9% of the times I have seen men looking at a woman wearing hijab, the man has never rejected the objectification of women. He's usually looking at her the same way he would any woman who is NOT wearing hijab.

Nosayba El-Sayed said...

Where did I make a generalization that every woman who wears a hijab is modest? I was clearly describing the "conceptual framework" and described clearly the discrepancy between reality and what hijab is "meant to" promote. I think you misunderstood my comment.

Yes what saddens me is what saddens me:) I didn't speak on behalf of anyone else. I was simply stating and expressing how I felt about the reality of muslim societies, in the light of my own understanding of what dressing modestly should entail. Thanks.

Ama said...

Dear Desert Girl , I liked your post and the comments that followed and I think yes Kuwait is changing as everywhere else and it is only natural to see relationships and associations between east and west. I encourage American men or any man for that matter to talk to any girl they like whether arab or any other origin.
I am Kuwaiti lady and I have experienced first hand what you have talked about.

Regards.... Ama

Hamon Ashford said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ama said...

Hi there Harmon I think staring is not accepted in any culture and I am sure if you spend enough time in kuwait you would know it is not as enclosed as one might think.

I think you should show polite interest to the object of your interest and if the feeling is mutual you will get a proper response.

Good luck

Ama

MacMan said...

Thanks for the informative piece desert girl. Btw, just to make one thing clear, if they hold eye contact with a blank look are they interested? Or is it they must smile before I should approach? Thanks. Don't want to get my head chopped off.

Royal Priest said...

Hello DG...

What an interesting discussion for the past 6-7 years. I have read all of the posts and responses and have noticed very subtle changes in the culture but more distinct differences in opinion. I have been in Kuwait for 11 months. I left for 2 months so I was literally in country for 9 months. I have tried many things. I'm not trying to date but just meet people in general. When I first came here in mid January 2015, I went out constantly to the mall, sheesha bars, restaurants, and flats for social gatherings. I met some Filipinos, Ethiopians (and other east Africans), Indians and some Egyptians but have never befriended a Kuwaiti. I gave up trying around April and became a recluse just to concentrate on work. Then in October I began my search again. I am using your blog as a general guideline to figure out how to meet women and men just for friendship and to share cultural backgrounds with. Recently, I was introduced to two Kuwaiti-Iranian brothers that were really open to conversation. I was very suprised because from my past experiences I have not been received as well as this time. But sadly my only encounter was interrupted and I never got their contact number or was able to follow-up. I will be leaving in about a month or so. I would hate for my year experience to end without making more Kuwaiti friends to keep in touch with once I return back to the US. Can I contact you? We can meet and maybe I can learn something from you in person. I am very open to other cultures... my family is very diverse having married people from all over the world.

Lost in Translation said...

I've been in Kuwait for six months. Leaving for a month, then coming back for a year. These past few months I've been spending time learning basic arabic. Unfortunately, I can't seem to meet any locals to practice with. I love infusing myself with different cultures and learn languages. And I consider myself pretty darn friendly. But I have to admit, meeting, much less befriending, Kuwaitis is not as easy as some may think.

I've already searched the MeetUp groups (very popular in the US), and surfed expat sites. It shouldn't be this hard to find someone to practice arabic with in an Arab country. Do Kuwaitis even want to meet and mingle with Americans?

Any tips are greatly appreciated. I will not give up...I'll make friends here whether they like it or not :)

All kidding aside, thanks for the post DG. Very enjoyable and informative. I hope it keeps going.

Ama said...

Dear Lost in translation ,

Thank you for your post.

Kuwaitis would love to befriend you too .. we are really friendly just maybe you did not run to meet someone who spoke English fluently.

Try to invite someone from work if possible for coffee. Also try the sports groups or the hangout places popular for young educated English speaking published in sites like these:

248am.com

good luck

ama

Irfan Khan said...

hi
ama
your very correct

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'm in my late 20's, from the UK and have lived and worked in Thailand for a number of years and found that the Thai women seem to love Western men. I'll be moving to Kuwait soon and am wondering if it's easy to find a relationship in Kuwait either with western or Filipina women? Or is it a bit dry? I'm also assuming western guys ensure to stay away from kuwaiti girls to avoid being thrown in jail?