Monday, March 16, 2015

Latest Trends in Hooking Up in Kuwait

Nah - this isn't even booty-call level.  This is below that standard....

There are no more relationships in Kuwait.  People don't date.  They don't need to.  They just get on the internet (programs like Instagram, WhoseHere, etc.), meet and then you can send them money for phone sex or a web cam session.

I don't date anymore. Honestly because I'm so revolted by how degrading everything has become. No one wants a decent relationship anymore.  They are obsessed with their "smart" phones (used by stupid people).  Most have multiple phones with multiple applications under multiple names. "Playing the field" has now become "playing the region".  All from the comfort of where ever you happen to be at that moment.

Disclaimer:  I have been living in Kuwait for a long time and I don't know how to rate it against dating back home in the US currently, so I can't say if it is better or worse or the same.  I'm just writing about my perspective and what I see here and now.

I met a guy recently through friends - and through the canine world.  I met him on several occasions  with his father.  They seemed like decent people and it was a decent way to meet.  We exchanged numbers.   So I started calling the guy and asked him the usual questions, 'Do you have a girlfriend,'  etc.  His answer was the same that I've heard from many-a-man lately:  "I don't have a girlfriend.  I have friends." Translation:  I have a lot of hook-up girls that I just call on for sex.  "I don't want a relationship." Wow.  Ok.  So... you're showing interest back at me for the same reason?  The guy was into phone sex - that's it.  That's the extent of his contact.  When that wasn't to continue, our "friendship" was over.  Pity. I liked him for a while.

I was really shocked when my x was scammed on webcam having sex and being videotaped by what he thought was a cute girl he met on the internet.  Turned out to be a guy who wanted to blackmail him.  This was a huge blow to me - I still find it hard to believe.  It was no big deal to X.  He thought nothing of it.  And why should he, I guess?  He does it all the time.  Everybody seems to be doing it all the time.

(My mother calls it "The New Religion":  Head bent in worship of the mighty cell phone.)  

My friends at the farm talk about me behind my back.  I know this.  And it isn't deceitful or mean.  They don't intend any harm.  They just all find it hard to believe that I don't have a man around - and haven't. My dear friend recently said in front of me (making a face that could have been referring to an injured kitten), "(Desert Girl) isn't lucky in love."

Ooooooh nooooo, that's not the problem, girlfriend.  It is that I'm selective.  I'm not going to put up with all the same bullshit others might be willing to adapt to.  Nope.  Her boyfriend, for example, is a very close friend.  I wouldn't put up with the way he treats her.  Hell to the no.  I love him as a friend, but in a romantic relationship - no way.

I'm not going to bring some average guy who won't last a week with me back to meet my friends and family.  I'm not going to be known like some of our other friends who bring "flavor of the week" around. Not this girl. If they rank the friends and family stage, it is something serious.

But alas, I doubt that's going to happen at all in this new/modern Kuwait environment.  Ick.  Phone sex, web cams and booty calls in the middle of the night.  No thanks.


Under_The_Mo0on said...

I am not gonna act surprised, but I never thought that this is the trend in Kuwait !

I knew my wife 4 years before we got married and we had a decent relationship. This took place in Kuwait knowing that we are both expats, and from different nationalities. I still however, know that it's very hard for people to find their match here or a to have decent relationships, regardless of the trend matter you mentioned.


Crazy in Kuwait said...

Girl, we used to cruise down Gulf or Love street to catch someone's eye but now you can't even get guys to move their butts at a traffic light because they are focused on that damn phone. I swear if a naked chick ran in front of their car they wouldn't notice.

Just like you I am shocked at the low levels of men available in this country. Even the old guys are pervs, no real men exist. What happened to the good ole' days before smart phones.

Desert Girl said...

Sala6a - I think there is still hope among expats, but even that is changing.

Crazy - Damn girl - just what I was thinking. I miss those days of post-it note phone numbers and discreet exchange of numbers in some dark road corner.

Everybody is out for high-tech, low-quality these days.

I try to be a recluse and stay with my dogs and goats as much as possible, but the few times that I venture out into the human world, I meet creatures that even my dog wouldn't associate with. Why bother?

GlobalTraveler said...

DG - I've been reading through your posts and appreciate the candor and writing style. I'm relocating to Kuwait in a few months and your missives provide an early peek. Thank you for doing what you do!

The Kuwaiti Godfather said...

Hey DG, I know it has been a while since I have posted here. I must say that you are on the dot with what is going on in the society but it is not only men, it is women as well. It is close to impossible to find someone special in Kuwait. The ladies who are usually interested are either married (playing has become somewhat a norm which is disgusting) or in a relationship with a man that does not know how lucky he is to have the person in his life (Looking for another rather then spending that energy on the person they're with). I am worried though as this is not only in Kuwait. Even during my visit to the UK, I was shocked to see that people there are not communicating as they used to. Everyone is stuck to the phone. I am grateful to have had bad relationships over the phone to realise that if it isn't real then it is worthless ... We do not live in a cocoon but rather a world that should be open to many exciting possibilities which finally leads to the right one. Day by day the feel of finding the right person fades away with what we see happening around. Hope the world changes for the better or else we will have a lot of good people just hanging with the sick people procreating worser humans.

Desert Girl said...

Hi Kuwaiti Godfather. Yes! It has been a while since you dropped in. So nice to hear from you.

I try to give advice to my 21 year old nephew to the tune of, "Just call her! Invite her to dinner!" and the response I get makes me feel more like I'm his grandmother than his cool aunt. "That's not how it's done now. It would be weird to just call her. She might think that I'm stalking her or something." WTF?!

Ok, I'm just a leetle bit older than he is and I'm sorry, but if dude can't pick up the phone and actually speak to me like a human, then why should I bother with him? Further, I can't remember the last time a man sent me flowers because he was interested/cared about me (not because he screwed up!). I would probably fall off my chair if it happened now - and that's sad.

I'm disgusted by what's going on now. I'm really really really thankful that I don't have children at this point in history. I wouldn't want to watch them go through what's happening out there.

Gela said...

Hey DG, it's always good to read your blog. Sadly, dating here in the U.S. isn't much different. Tinder seems to be king now. I tell friends I refuse to do online dating, and they tell me I'll never meet anyone. At this point, that doesn't really bother me. It's pretty sad your nephew equates a phone call with stalking. I don't know what it would take for a man to actually call me these days. It's usually all through texting or Whatsapp. Anyway, I'm pretty happy with my friends and my cat!

Delusional 47 said...

okay, I don't know where to start. but ill try to be as objective and unbiased as I can since there is so much in the wrong. I wont start with how you cant comment freely on this blog and you get to block and delete with what ever comment you want based on your own scale and judgment of hate and negative energy, and jump straight to the point. cool "There are no more relationships in Kuwait. People don't date. They don't need to. They just get on the internet (programs like Instagram, WhoseHere, etc.), meet and then you can send them money for phone sex or a web cam session.
" you are implying that there is absolutely no relationships in Kuwait and all people in Kuwait wither men or women. theyre either selling themselves on webcam or buying a session. ? in the end we are all human, all looking for a compassionate touch, a genuine bond, you cant imagine how many single guys I am surrounded by all being rejected by multiple times on a daily basis. and all of them are decent. ''It is that I'm selective. I'm not going to put up with all the same bullshit others might be willing to adapt to'' come on you really think youre not in the wrong here. start your day with a pen and paper and see how many times men are rejected by woman, and youre telling me all of these men's only interest is sex ? most are like woman, lonely and seeking to be understood or at least relate. selective isn't something you do with people at least not a state of mind to be in to initiate something with someone. if you are going to reject every person based on a list you have in your mind and then stumble on a person who fits well with that list only later to find hes true intentions baby there isn't something wrong with men, there is something wrong with you and that list of yours

Desert Girl said...

Delusional - an appropriate nickname. To say that I don't give a fuck about your comment at the moment and it is the very very least of my problems at the moment is the understatement of the century. I'm not forcing you to read the blog - or anyone else. I'm not forcing you to be kind or considerate or have even one positive thing to say. But you are right - when I get shitty comments like yours, I tend not to publish them - to delete them or brush them under the carpet. Why? Because this is MY BLOG NOT YOURS. You have your perspective. I have mine. Yours may differ - so why don't you start your own blog so I wont' bother reading it? You have just validated my point that I am picky. I am selective. And if the choice in men equates simply to negative people like you, I will become a lesbian tomorrow.

Mohammed Khaled said...

Well 15 years and still single. I don't live in Kuwait for more than two months a year since I joined medical college. But finding the right girl is difficult and online dating as well is hopeless.
There was only 4 girls in those 15 years that I had a chance with... One went away to India for studies, another was too scared to tell her mom she liked a guy, another got arranged married and the past one.... Well also got arranged married. :/

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