Monday, December 13, 2010

I got a zoo on my terrace

Did I mention that I really hate cats?

You would never know it.  Ok, I don't hate them, but I'm just not a cat person.  I'm a dog person.  They are two completely different worlds.  I'm also really allergic to most cats; although strangely enough, not often to dumpster-divers like I have around here.  Their dander must be masked under all that dirt and oil they carry around.  Dunno.

Anyhoo, Petunia gave birth (as you know because you too have no life and actually read what I write) and one died (know that too) and Louey and Dewie were the survivors.  Dewie has been really sick.  He's got kitty trots.  He's dehydrated and he hasn't gained as much as that fun-loving skamp brother of his, Louey.  So, it has been shtanky out on the terrace lately.  Petunia, that biotch, has gone in search of a new man.  She has only come around once recently looking for food.  What kind of a MOTHER are you!!!!  Shame!

I have become surrogate mom to little Dewie.  Louey is always off chasing things, but Dewie is a mama's boy. He actually follows me into the house.  Git OUT!  Desert Dawg is justifiably jealous.

So, I'm leaving in a few days to the States for Cwimmas and I would feel really really bad leaving the babies without adequate care (anyone want to babysit for 2 weeks?).  If one of them died because I didn't help it... well, I would just feel awful (again, not that I like cats so much).  My landlady promised to have her khadama come down and feed them (whew!  That is a relief.)

I finally gave in today and took the brothers to the vet - the new one behind City Center in Salmiya, The Animal House Hospital (Ishityounot - that's really the name). I didn't know it was there until The Romanian turned me onto it.  HA! No lines!  No customers.  But, I still favor Dr. Juanita at Dolhama (or whateverthefek the spelling is) and when I have time to drive down to BF, Dr. Paula, Dr. Angelo, and Dr. Stephania at IVH. Nice Egyptian vet lady at Animal House (no, she was not wearing dark sunglasses) said that stray cats are resiliant and they should be fine.

Anyhoo, I really don't know if D&L are boys or girls. Neither did the vet at the Animal House (no, it wasn't John Belushi).  She said their parts were still "too small".  (Don't even get me started on small parts....I could... I won't....)

Anyhoo, poor little Dewie... She gave him a glucose injection and then fed him some awful stuff so that he won't have diarrhea (I had to look that word up twice on spell check and Blogger still isn't accepting it). Louey was having a fit trying to protect Dewey - he was running all around the cat carrier (which I actually bought to take Limpy to have her leg amputated, but she hasn't come around recently.)

So get this shet:  I have to do the same thing 3 times a day!  I have to torture a helpless kitten by injecting him with glucose.  This is like my worst nightmare!!!  It would only be worse if someone told me to kick a puppy.  Just kill me now.

Poor little Dewie. I wrapped him in a towel and gave shim his/her injection. He made some pathetic noises and then he ran under my storage shed.  Louey came out crying miserably and I almost started crying.  He looked all over the yard (seemingly) for Dewie.  He looked down the drain pipe... howling and crying.  Oh.My.God.  I just about lost it.  I thought Dewie was dead - because I shot him wrong.

Dewie came running out a few minutes later like nothing ever happened.  ... the bellowing from Louey continued.  It turns out that he was after the chicken I left on the stairs for  (get this)  Moo.

You might ask, "Who the HELL is Moo?"  Moo is an older black and white kitten with blue eyes who just showed up about 5 days ago.  He's now really good friends with Louey and Dewie. (Butterfly, I think you should take Moo.... just sayin....)

It's really weird, but I always seem to be left with exactly 3 cats.  Isn't that odd?  Bossy Cat, Petunia, and Limpy have all gone off to do their things and now they stuck me with kittens.  WTF?  Before that, it was Petey, Paint, and Petunia.  Do you think 3 cats is an omen of some sort?

Yeah, I know, right?  I'm PAtheTIC and I have no life.  Go ahead, say it.  It could be true.  But noooo - that's not the only thing I've got going on in my world.  I'm just not sayin about some other things.

I will tell you this - I had a GREAT time at the barbecue with my buddies yesterday.  Thanx, Spanx, for doing all the work FOR me.  Thanx Mr. Spanx for doing all the cooking.  Butterfly brought more food, as did Slaps.  The Romanian came out of her cave for a while.  Bobarino was in rare form.

And TelecommGirl, God has a plan for you, my dear friend.  It will all work out.  We love  you and we are here to support you:  24/7, 365 days of the year.

Hey, guess what happened!  It is Muharram (don't know the right way to spell that) and one of my neighbors brought me jareesh (Kuwaiti food).  I've been in Kuwait 14+ years and this was only the second time one of my neighbors brought me food.  It was so cool. I thought they got the wrong house.  Hey, rock on, Rumaithiya!   I love it here.

I said this on Facebook and I will say it again:  This has been a great year for me. Mashallah.  I've had so many blessings in so many different packages.  Even losing my job was a good thing/good time because it led to something much better and more fulfilling.  Word to the Big Man In The Sky:  Thank you for blessing my life with good friends, good times, good health, good family, good dog, (reasonably) good hair, and okay.... with a few cats too.


Anonymous said...

And a very Merry Christmas to you - and your brood of kittens. Better you than me! Enjoy VA and the cold weather we're having. Autumn got skipped.

Anonymous said...

I had a good laugh with all the cats from someone who hates?? cats. I LOVE cats (female cats really) and feed all the strays outside and we have so many and I name all the bad boys glenn Beck Rush Limbaugh (the big fat one that sprays everywhere) Sean Hannity is out there too spraying. BTW if the Vet can't tell by now if they are boys or girls then they must be girls or you would see 2 little dots.


Lawyergirl said...

Watch out - the female vet at that place BUTCHERED my friend's cat when she had her spayed there. Cut was huge and became infected (which vet tried to say was because my friend let the cat get wet - uh, didn't happen!). Second opinion vet was astonished.

Desert Girl said...

Lawyergirl - I wasn't impressed by the vet at Animal House - at all. She never asked me why I brought them there, never discussed vaccinations or food or anything, just didn't seem interested in the care of the animals. It was even hard to get her to make eye contact. Not impressed.