Sunday, October 12, 2008

Best places in Kuwait to have a fist fight

The MALL, of course, Silly!!!!

Al Watan: “Fights break out in Marina Mall: Marina Mall in Salmiya was the scene of a fierce fist fight on Saturday morning when a number of youth tried to steal the jewelry of a 58-year-old Egyptian woman (gee, maybe they wanted to get their mommy a present?). Some witnesses intervened to help the woman (well, finally, there are men!) They got involved in a fight with the thieves who were arrested and delivered to police officers. Similarly, three citizens were involved in another fight at the same shopping mall. Each of the three Kuwaitis suffered injuries including deep wounds to the hands, faces, and bruises…”

Isn’t the mall just the best place to go when you want to get into a fist fight? First, Marina Mall has valet parking, so if you want to extend the lifespan of the roid rage, it makes it that much quicker from the car to the Scene of The Crime. There is, of course, very little security and wide-open spaces with lots of room for fighting and for spectators. Heck, they even have a spectator balcony, so the contenders can feel like they're in a real fight pit!! The maintenance guys can clean up the blood - and its a FREE service. Once you are done fist fighting, you can go get a cool drink and perhaps something to eat at any one of the wonderful restaurants.... Maybe later, walk around and gzzzz some girls, looking macho and puffed up from your recent altercation. Ah, smell the testoserone!

I have noticed that the police were actually present at The Avenues this weekend. I counted two and – surprisingly and to my delight – neither of them was a stick man with a walrus moustache. One wonders: Could it be progress?

Arab Times yesterday: “Kuwaiti cuts friend’s throat: victim stabbed, dragged into bathroom”. Hey – what are friends for anyways? If you’re my friend, you’ll let me slit your throat; I love you. I promise to go to your funeral. Really. Because I love you. You're my best friend.

People have commented here previously with questions like, “If you don’t like it here, why do you stay?” As someone insightful has answered, “If you love something, you try to improve it when you see something wrong.” Personally, I think Kuwait needs a lot of help right now. It seems to be at a very low point in its history and it seems like every weekend, it escallates a notch or two.

Bad boyz, bad boyz whatchagonna do... whatchagonna do when they come for you... bad boyz bad boyz....

7 comments:

Pak-Canadian Texan said...

Do NOT valet your car at Marina Mall...I got into a wreck last week with one of the valet drivers. Apparently...looking back while reversing is a foreign concept.

Desert Girl said...

The only time when you look back when reversing is when you are doing it up an exit ramp in the opposite direction of traffic! Everybody knows that!

Bobarino used the valet parking at Marina Mall one time; The valet dudes told him that his battery was dead. Someone came forward in the parking lot and told him that the valet guys were using HIS Yukon to jump start another car in the garage and that they fried his battery. They had to buy him a new one, but only after he threatened them at length.

Hornet said...

I keep saying the police work is proactive to eliminates the crime before it happens, there have to be a police present in these shopping malls.
We use to have semi police force, they were called "Haras Aswaq" Shopping Guard, when the M.O.I. elements this force we have shopping robbery and street killing I strongly recommend to reestablish that force back again.

Hellraiser said...

“If you don’t like it here, why do you stay?” Well it never ceases to amaze me how ignorant people are. Constructive criticism is the way forward towards a better life. I wonder how would they feel if they were to be victimised will they leave it be and say this is Kuwait? Or will they rant like bitches.

Jewaira said...

Your post was funny.

But the situation is damned serious.

Hornet said...

DG I know you loves Kuwait, I agree with you if you love the country try to improve it not ignore it.
Talking about situations in the country dose mean that you loves the place and the people.
GOD bless you & thank you for uncovering the proplems.

Stan said...

i'm dyin 2 catch one of these fist fights live on cam...so i can upload it on youtube !!! guess i'll go 2 one of these malls on sat's huh .