Saturday, July 30, 2011

A Very Desert Girl Summer

I had a great flight to DC.  I flew Xanax Air; got on the plane, popped a pill, and woke up in Virginia.  It was almost as quick as Dorothy tapping her ruby slippers together.  Bada BING. 

Xanax is what got me through my root canals.  I finished all 3.  Woo hoooooo.  My dentist, The Amazing Dr. Unni at New Mowasat, thought he was a wonderful psychiatrist who talked me through my dental phobia.  I finally had to confess to him that it was medication.  He thought that was hysterical. 

So I'm in Virgin - yuh.

Like my fambily says, "It's like you never left."  Now, I can't tell if they are saying that as a good thing or as an "OMG, not YOU again." kind of thing.  In the beginning of the trip, I sense more of the former.  Perhapsee after a few weeks of me loitering around just staring at them, the later.

I've been having so much fun in Kuwait that I really do miss it this time. 

It is even totally refreshing to MISS my boss.  Who DOES that?  She is more like a friend than a bosslady.  It makes such a difference going to work in the mornings, knowing that you work with good people/friends(I'm not just saying this to suck up and get more money because God knows how difficult that is in Kuwait...  She's genuinely my type of people.) I even really enjoy picking on our Ops Manager.  He didn't get me at first, but now he's picking on me right back and it is a great way to work through the day.   Who would have thought - a year ago - that I would be in this job surrounded by decent folk?  Well, the guy that I worked with at the old company - and we could never really figure out if he was my "boss" or not (he was more like a really great colleague) - he was decent and a kind person.   But I couldn't really plop myself down into a chair in his office and talk about PMS and my relationshits. I think he would rather be shot in the head. With Stella, I CAN and I DO and I think she looks at me and says, "Hey, Stella, your life isn't so bad after all.  Lookit how screwed up THIS girl is!"  That's okay with me. I am and without me, all you people out there would have nothing to point fingers at and giggle.  Ergo the blog.  Pure, cheap, unrated entertainment. 

So, back to missing parts of Kuwait.  I miss my Southern Bedu.  I hated leaving him alone.  He makes me feel like I should protect him.  He feels the same way of me.  I've been pestering my friends constantly to go see him or call him. I know I'm a pain in the ass (shut UP!)  That fine too; I would do it for them too.

Southern Bedu has epilepsy.  I don't know anything about it.  I don't even know how to spell it really.  Does anybody know if there are epilepsy centers in Kuwait?  I'm going to check things out over here.

He's a great guy and if I can keep him from talking too much and getting on my nerves, I will probably marry him.  Yes, he has asked.  Yes, I have talked to his sister and he has received the Royal Approval from The Mother.  

My dear friend, Butterfly, had me compile a list of all the things that I wanted from a man.  Yeah, I know, you people probably think it was like 12 pages long, typed, single-spaced, but you would be wrong.  I went through that phase in my 20's (I'm still 29 - shut UP!).  If you have ever seen the movie, "Up In The Air" with my Hero-God, George Clooney, there is a part where the young actress recants her list to the older actress.  Her list goes on forever.  The older actress' list doesn't.  Neither did mine.  (Older actress might have been older, but damn sexy, BTW).  So anyhoo, I made my list - while Butterfly and The Romanian looked on (they MADE me do it) and SHAZAM; a few weeks later, in walked Southern Bedu.  On my list was, "Someone I can have a great conversation with."  Well yes, I can with him, but I didn't say anything about him talking too damn much.  Nothing is perfect.

I'm (Mashallah) in a very comfortable place in my life.  I feel like everything is grounded.  (Watch me get hit by a bus....)

I have told my family about him.  My spunky younger sister immediately told me to marry him.  That's a good sign.  I'm sure my mother will not approve.  She never does.  No one is good enough for me.  No one will ever ever be good enough for me in her eyes.  I have accepted that. I love her, but by God - I'm 29 years old.  When will anyone ever be perfect?  They won't.

I adore my mom.  I am so thankful To The Big Man Above that I feel this way.  Yes, she has things that drive me crazy.  Mom/daughter relationships are always like that.  I realize that things that I let go might drive others more crazier, but ...whatever.  I think that if I hadn't had Arab friends when I was a teenager, SCREAMING at my mother using not-so-nice language, I probably would have a very different relationship with her today.  I remember Reyad say, "WHAT are you DOING?! You don't talk to your MOTHER like that!  Even if she is wrong!"  He was really pissed.    It just made me take pause for a minute (and many more to follow) to think about it.  Anyhooo, I dunno, but I try to always do what she wants and to pre-empt her thought process so she doesn't have to ask for stuff.   She's getting older and I can't imagine my life without her.  What will I do?  My dad died when he was 2 years older than she is now (I'm 29, so I can't allow you people to do the math).  She is in a lot better shape than he was. 

She lives in a beautiful lake-side home that my sister picked/bought for her to live in. Yes, my sister is an amazing person.  It is perfect for her.  She is within walking distance from everything and about 5 minutes from my sister's place.  It is really one of the most beautiful places she could be living.  She wakes up to geese in the morning and can see the lake from her bed, and in the evenings puts on classical music, has a glass of wine and watches people go by on small boats. The lake is surrounded by foliage and capped with gorgeous sunsets.  What more could a mom want?

...and now... let's talk about my hair...

So after my experience with the Brazilian Blowjob (I mean, "Blowout"), I was left 3 weeks later feeling that I had wasted a chunk of change.  It was back to normal..  I asked Ashlee, Hair Godess, why.  She said that it may have been that my hair was over-processed and maybe it didn't take hold.   The BB only stays in your hair at the salon for a few hours before they use the hot irons and send you on your merry way.  I thought I would try the Chocolate Keratin treatment to see how that would go.  Style has had it and her hair always looks great.  The only kicker: you have to leave the stuff in for THREE DAYS.  Oh yeah, you people might be saying, "Beauty is pain - suck it up, pansy girl." but when you are in heat that gets to around 130F and you sweat a lot - it is DISSSSSSGUSTING.  On day 2.5, I tried to de-grease it by putting in some powder stuff that I got at Tony and Guy.  It is similar to dry shampoo (remember PSSSSSSSSSSSSST?).  Well, when you are working with that much grease, apparently it just turns your hair into concrete.  It was totally gross.  I can't even tell you.  I was getting funny looks at work.  It wasn't pretty.
God, I go on!

Otay, so I got the stuff washed out on day 3 and I was just fine.  I announced loudly in the salon (Strands, Fanar) that I have the most disgusting hair in Kuwait.  The Kuwaiti ladies giggled ("Of course you do, honey." is what they were thinking.  I know because I am telepathic.  Yes yes, I am.)  Anyhoo, they washed it out and sent me on my merry way.  Funny thing that - I could see my ROOTS way more clearly with straight hair.  Dayam.  Another appointment.

Et here I am, weeks later and my hair looks damnfrickingoooood.  My sisters have commented.  That's cool.  I'm happy.  But, guess what I found out from Shannon, my sister's stylist:  You shouldn't use shampoo with sulfates after a keratin treatment.  Did you know this?  They didn't tell me such advice at Strands.  I've been using Loreal for weeks - and it is the wrong kind.  So, if you are planning to do any kind of keratin treatments, make sure that you use non-sulfate shampoo or you will ruin the treatment.  Fasssscinating.  Maybe this is what I did wrong after the Brazilian?

--- End of hair discussion ---

Tomorrow we are travelling to the Outer Banks in North Carolina where I will eat too many crabs and drink way too much alcohol and have a wonderful time.  My whole family is going.  I think we are up to 3 cars now (not sure).  It is so pretty down there.  Can't wait.  All compliments of my Incredibly Generous Sister. 

Her house, by the way, looks amazing.  I'm surrounded by green trees outside and big airy spaces.  I love it here.

So before I left, I had some great parties at my place:  4th of July, Spanx's baby shower, and a "goodbye to me" dinner (I love the pasta - it doesn't love me back.  I got sick).  I love entertaining and I finally have a place that will allow me to do it.  I can't wait for this Autumn (around November in Kuwait) and the barbecues.  I have such a great group of friends (and I'm not just saying that because I know they are reading this).  I have met many of them through the blog.

It is kind of weird because some of my friends (even Southern Bedu) don't know that I have the blog.  Then there are lots that I have met through the blog (like Spanx, Special K, Butterfly).  Sometimes I get confused.  SoBedu is going to know eventually, I'm sure.  I'll have to tighten up my act then I guess so he doesn't get too pissed off.  Someone asked me if I am still going to have the blog if I get married.  OF COURSE!  Do you really think I would PAY for psychological help when I can just rant here for free?  Dude!


Anonymous said...

xanax in kuwait?
no gd way?
you must have had to see a big time shrink...
i had to give a copy of my civil id to the local govt clinic and say i was on the verge of husbandcide to get 3!, as in one, two, three, tabs of valium!
better to fly to india and get the good stuff otc or buy it from someone who did

Anonymous said...

Nice post desert girl.

Your part about hair reminds me, does any one here know of a place that is actually good at cutting men's hair? I know women can't cut it, I don't care who cuts it, I just want some one that is actually trained and knows more than one style.

Anonymous said...

So are you really 29 :p

Emms said...

Nice,happy to hear u r in a fine place in your life...take care,it might get better!

Desert Girl said...

Xanax - A friend of a friend gave me hers. No idear where she got it from, but yes, in Kuwait. I have never had it before, but yummmmm.

Expat and the City said...

You sound really happy which makes me happy. Keep enjoying your trip and spending time with your family. xoxo

I'm curious...

What are the items in the USA that you always buy and bring back with you to Kuwait? The things you can't get here. I thought it would be interesting for your readers to see in a post. (The stuff that isn't XXX) heehee

P.S. Now I want to go to India ;P

Shilpa Verma said...

DG... I'm really happy to see you happy (touch wood!)

Expat & the City.. I'm coming from India to Kuwait later this month... lemme know if you need something from here :-)

American Girl said...

I always love your longer posts filled with so much detail! It sounds like you're really happy and I'm so happy for you.

Expat and the City said...

Shilpa ~ Just have a safe journey to Kuwait. Thank you for asking me. :D

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking my upcoming trip to India will involve a side jaunt to the local pharmacy. I'm such a fan of Xanax Air, but had trouble convincing the local medico that any sort of -cide- was about to happen, so he declined to provide my fix. Fortunately, I still had three or four tablets of Triazolam, which worked nearly as well. Now I'm really out, and India beckons.

P.S. Congratulations on the "saying Yes" bit. Have some crab for me. Yummmmmy

Anonymous said...

DG's blog is always like a great cup of coffee in the morning!

George (from NYC)

abolesanzalef said...

Welocme backooooooo!!

Nived said... hellova blog.. kept me smiling all throughout, as i read it. in btwn r u really 29. You sound way too young, thts good though. keeping the mind young is the only way to be happy.Good for you :D. keep blogging..just love it.