Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Yeah Baybee - I'm a Superstah!

So I am finding that people (real people not just virtual ones) read the trash I write. Isn't that amazing? Wow. I feel so warm and fuzzy and just knowing that they are out there makes me feel special (and not in a short bus way either).

Some of my friends are starting to correlate my name to my blog too which is very scary because now I have to be way more careful.

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Several things have made my week incredibly wonderful. Hearing my friend (let me just call her) "Flygirl" call me this morning and tell me that she had had coffee with someone who recognized my name and said that I was (this is soooooo phucking cool), "a superstar" really topped my list. I'm walking around with my chest out (which is actually a dangerous thing since "the girls" are so large and destructive).

This is Wednesday, so I have to tell you about the beginning part of the week too. I had a meeting with a company that recently held what was supposed to be a French fry (or "freedom fry" for our Republican friends) taste test. Turned out to be a French fry focus group … anyhoo….. being the person I am, I sent them some unique feedback on the event. The reps called and said that they wanted to meet with me (oh crap – look what I did, now they're mad), so I wasn't really looking forward to the meeting. I forgot all about it over the weekend (because I'm blonde and we need to be re-trained at the beginning of every week). Anyways, they walked in on Saturday morning – early – carrying a HUGE bouquet of flowers and with a wrapped box of chocolates. Let me just say that if we were in prison, I'd be their bitch for life. I will do ANYTHING (business-related or of a semi-personal nature) for these guys. Amazing. I keep advising people that they need to send flowers for PR. Even guys love getting flowers. I know – I've done it. They love you forever.

Speaking of loooooooooooove - I've been having Man trouble. I love him. Want to marry him. Why is it necessary to have so much DRAAAAAAAAAMA? Jeez. I'm a simple girl with simple needs; which, believe it or not have nothing to do with money, fame and all that designer bullshit that goes with it. I am happy to receive some attention, some flowers, and some kenafa once in a while. Why can't my amazingly gorgeous (both inside and out) Man understand that? Why must Kuwait be so full of drama? Can't we all just get along (Rodney King for those of you who didn't catch the reference)? The Man disappeared for 2 weeks due to some family crap and only recently returned and I can't really figure him out. So this week he came back and I guess that was a good thing. Bobarino already bought duct tape, hefty garbage bags, and a chain saw and we had picked out the plot for the hole in the desert…. But it really wasn't necessary after all. (Just kidding big bad internet police.) I just want to know when I turned into one of those whiny girls who talks about her boyfriend all the time? I MAKE FUN of those girls! Waaaa waaaaa waaaaaaa…. But I loooooove him (has to be said with a Southern accent).

4 comments:

Baroque said...

lo0o0l i loved this post!
its so bubbly!
if u ever are going to go ahead with your murder plan, count me in, i have people to add to that list! ;p

Desert Girl said...

Baroque. Get your "go bag" ready. Every good murderess should have a sharp looking bag that she can tote out to the scene of the crime! It should include lipstick (gotta look good), duct tape (can be used as a marital aid prior to the crime), hefty bags, bleach, a carving knife (battery operated of course for remote chopping), a chain saw (Ace Hardware), rubber gloves and a shower cap. Oh, and some lighter fluid and a lighter. Always remember that bodies are identifiable by 2 main characteristics: teeth and finger prints. If you can dispose of them separately, better do it. Of course the body will eventually be identifiable by DNA, but this will give you time to leave the country.

(Yes, I have given this some thought.)

ananyah said...

ooooooh I wanna join the murder plan! Sounds fun!

Anyhooo Supastar, it is kinda cool when ppl close to you offline find out about your blog, it happened to me, but part of me is uncomfortable with it. I mean, what if you argue with them and you wanna bitch about it? My X knew about my blog, I used to bitch about him on it, and he used to call me up and say "So it's like that ha!", and I felt like I lost something when they found out and I had to stop saying certain things (mainly there REAL names or else I may get sued haha)

I'll bring a drill to get their teeth out! and fingers, well Yan Can Cook's knife will be just dandy! We could always chop their body up into tiny pieces and feed it to a starving camel? I mean, sure we murder someone, but we also help a poor dying camel at the same time?! We must get some brownie points for that!

Hmm Do Camels eat meat tho? Or are they one of those weird Veggies?

Anonymous said...

Haha. Desert Girl, first of all lemme tell you how much I enjoy reading your articles about Kuwait and our "environment" here. Really made me smile so, thanks for that I guess. Anyways, about your guy problem, I'm pretty sure he's doing all this on purpose you know? Maybe try'na make you feel confused about him, thus giving him the advantage of you being unable to read him. It's a wild guess, but hey atleast I tried. =D