Tuesdays - Ugly Fun!

I go to a tailor in Jabriya and even when it is Africa-hot, he has no AC or fan on in the fitting room. Let me just tell you, that when you are crammed into a little closet the size of a coffin, trying on stuff you want to have darted (in or out), and sweating profusely -- nothing will ever look good. I even realized how much I hate the back of my head when I saw it in the mirror there. Who would have thought it would turn out to be one of my least-favorite features? Until the tailors, I was pretty sure that the back of my head looked like one of those girls' on a Clairol commercial, but noooooo.

Another pet peeve is going to the tailor and having Kuwaiti women arrive after me and the tailor says (with excruciating pain written all over his face and very quietly as to not set off a stampede), "Excuuuse me," and dash to help THEM. Chelloooooo. I was there FIRST and I'm 100 times more likely not to bargain/quibble over a price. I turn mean-nasty-American on them in 2.5 nanoseconds. 'Yo! Babu! I was here FIRST, mothafuckah!' (I don't actually say that, but the voices inside my head are screaming it.) I relent because he does such a good job, really (when he's not pissing me off). He is probably mean to me because he can hear the racist voices inside my head calling him 'Babu'.

Yesterday, I watched from my apartment balcony as a rather well-dressed man pulled up in his car and assisted a lady from my building into his car (looks like they were on their way to the airport). Dude opens the trunk, pulls out a tire and literally chucks it into the middle of our street! What tha phuck??? I was on my way out anyhow, so I went downstairs (full of piss and vinegar) and said, "Excuse me, would you mind picking up that tire you just threw in the middle of the street? We don't live in a junkyard." He said, "What tire?" 'The one you just threw right there.' "Oh." So I made him take it to the dumpster not 20 feet away. People are so stupid.

Since Khara fee is making our street look like an absolute dumpster anyways, everybody thinks that it is ok to dump their junk wherever they feel like it. I'm surprised people haven't started to pee out there. (Maybe they have?) It is disgusting. Since the construction oopa-loompas have come around, the trash men don't think they have to collect either. Yes, it is stinky.

What is the deal with changing all of the frickin curbs in Kuwait anyways? Didn't we already have a parking problem? Now they have created parking problems all over Salmiya (coming soon to a neighborhood near you!). Let's discuss anti-corruption for a moment here. Who AWARDED the new curb tender? Why was there ever a tender out there to provide new curbs? Who the phuck needs the new curbs? What was wrong with the old curbs? All of a sudden, there are 12" curbs all over Salmiya and nobody can park. I can't get my sports car up there in front of my own building. Why doesn't someone issue a tender for installing grass or trees or flowers and maintaining them? What is UP with the curbs????

We had to take a friend to the airport last night. Tuesday nights are ugly-fun nights at the Kuwait International Airport. You want an ugly partner – be sure to look for him/her there! Slapperella made the mistake of somehow parking in a staff parking space and it took her close to an hour to get help and get out. Help came in the form of a cute Kuwaiti security guard who, as she reported it, "Wasn't havin' it." Too bad. The Slapperella charm is usually able to penetrate any armor (so to speak).

I think that is the end of most of my bitching for today. I have more, but they concern work and I don't have the energy to get into that tirade.

On a more pleasant note (shut tha fuuu up - there is too one!)... I had the first dream about my father since he passed away. He was standing next to a river and a small white house (kind of like in that movie, "Big Fish") with a lot of people around him. He looked serene and was staring out over the water. He didn't say anything to me, but I woke up feeling better. I think the house was supposed to belong to my cousin, Kim's father (I have never really gotten the familial connection there) in Norfolk.