Tuesday, November 21, 2006
If we were hamsters…
If we were hamsters, we’d snack, we’d nap, we’d think about working out, we’d snack again, nap some more….
Hey… wait a minute….
(That’s not original, by the by – I bought a greeting card in Target with that sentiment, but I love it.)
The Man’s first name was Hamed and I used to call him Hamster. I had this whole little routine worked out with my girlfriends of the “Hamster Dance”. Very amusing (to me!)
I had a date scheduled for tonight (from like a week ago) with a guy who I have been putting off. He’s ok and all that, but reeeeeeeeeal pushy. Anyhoo, he was all ready go to out with me and I said, “Pick me up at 7:30?” He said, “Can’t we make it after 9?” I like – WORK, you know? I get up before the sun rises. Turns out he “has a meeting” prior to 9 (Suuuuuuuure. And like – who schedules a meeting on the same night that you have a date you have been asking for for weeks?) So, I sent him a quick SMS from work, “I was planning on an early dinner and several hours of earth-shattering sex, but I’ll RSVP to that symposium that my boss wanted me to attend tonight instead -- since you’re busy…” He immediately called and said he would re-schedule his meeting. Yuh. Too late, buddy. You are on the “Grade A” Idiot List now.
…Just like the guy who has been asking me out for 6 months. I travel a lot, so I was THOUGHTFUL (AKA “stupid”) and brought him a bottle of cologne which I dropped off at his office. Dude calls me and tells me, “Oh, I’m getting engaged. I’m going to save this for my wedding.” No! I am not kidding!!! I couldn’t make this shit up even if I tried.
My life is good. I received a hokey e-mail from a friend, entitled, “I am thankful…” listing all the ways you can turn a negative into something to be thankful for. (for Example: For the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.
For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means I am alive.) Well, in response to that e-mail… I am thankful that I do have men in my life and that I’m not a toothless no-job ugly chick with poor table manners driving a 25 year old Toyota. Yeah. I’ll keep telling myself that.