Pondering the Posting about Relationships. What do you think?

Should I or should I not write about relationshits?  This is the question.... hmmmmm.... and then - should I allow comments on posts regarding relationshits so that I can get more negativity from da hatahs? 

I ponder this all the time now because:

1. So many people in my personal and professional life know who I really am.  This gives them the ability to judge me by my BMCing here on the blog.  Perhapsee they have one impression of who I am and then they read this and say "OMG - Who KNEW she is so dysfunctional?"
2. I don't want sound like a whiney girl all the time. (I'm usually the one who listens to people.)
3. Negativity is not good for the soul.
4. He may, someday/somehow, read the post and see me differently (in a negative/judgmental way). 

At the same time, the "cons":

1. Maybe someone will relate to what I have to say and feel better about their own situation.
2. Perhapsee by writing about it and getting it out there, it will be therapy for me (which was my original objective of the blog).
3. My friends are so sick of hearing me talk about it that I will have an objective/independent audience for feedback.

What do you think?  Should I dish?  I am going to leave this one to the floor to discuss and reply.  I have taken off the "no anonymous comments allowed" feature.  Please feel free to be honest.

When I first started this blog, it was SO therapeutic because I could say whatever I wanted without fearing that my family, friends, colleagues, and potential business acquaintances would read it and know who I was.  Now, I'm all over the map and it is scary.  I'm finding it a dilemma. 

Toilets in Kuwait

Nelson wrote to me, saying that he is coming to Kuwait soon and has concerns about toilets here.  I thought this may be a post of interest to some out there, so I am not just adding his comments as a reply, but right here, in-your-face, so that everyone gets the picture:

Coming to a foreign country can be a scary experience - especially when you venture into public toilets.

Public toilets in Kuwait: Avoid any places government-related would be my advice. Most of the malls and privately-owned toilets are fine. 

Squatter

Some  public bathrooms are quite grand.  The Sheraton Hotel's bathroom in downtown Kuwait is my ultimate favorite (Squatter photo NOT the Sheraton!)  (Maybe I should start a "Rate the Public Bathroom" poll - think I will...)  The Sheraton's ladies bathroom, outside their banquet hall is marble with gold-plated fixtures.  It is gorgeous.  It has a private seating area for brides and ladies-in-waiting which includes a massage chair. 

Squat toilets are mostly outdated these days with the exception of traditional places (or private homes); where you will usually find both "squat" and "sit". As a woman who enjoys the freedom of being able to wear tight jeans and stilettos, I have conquered the squat toilet to much acclaim; I can do it drunk or sober, in sickness and in health, in variations of seasonal changes. The squat toilet is not to be feared.  It is actually more sanitary than "sit" toilets, as you never touch anything.  Unfortunately, they seem to be smellier.  I have also found that the little foot grooves are often dirty.

Most places in Kuwait have western-standard "sit" toilets. The differences in the bathrooms that you will find here will be:

Bidets: OhmahGod I love bidets!  Just be careful that if you are using one, you check the water temperature first. In the summer, you may just quite literally burn your ass. Bidets are just good, clean fun.  You don't see a lot of Summer's Eve products in this part of the world and there is a reason for that.... just sayin....

Water hoses:  There are water hoses in every stall (and I miss them when I go back to the States).  People use water in this part of the world to clean their private parts. (I do too - MUCH more sanitary and you have that clean, fresh feeling all day.)

Bathroom attendants (a service of the past in Western countries where minimum wage has made them outdated). They can be annoying because they just stand there and you will get the puppy eyes until you give them a tip.  They hold the hand-towels hostage, so they have to hand them to you so they are doing you a service which you feel you must reward them for.  You know that they are only making about 2 cents, so you start digging looking for coins.  Alms for the poor and all that. 

So Nelson, thanks for writing and I hope this answers your questions.  If there are any other interesting Kuwait factoids that I can impart, please do let me know.

PEOPLE:  What is your favorite public bathroom in Kuwait?  What is your least favorite?  Inquiring minds want to know!  Tell us!

Kuwait Finally Wising Up to Wild Animals as Pets?

Arab Times

Hunt Begins For Pet Wild Animals

‘Safety Of People Vital’

KUWAIT CITY, Aug 26: The Interior Ministry in cooperation with the Public Authority for Agricultural Affairs and Fish Resources (PAAAFR) is said to be looking for ‘pet’ wild animals which put at risk the lives of citizens and residents, reports Al- Anba daily. The authorities have called on residents and citizens to notify them if they are aware of any wild animals in their vicinity. The daily added, the authorities plan to confiscate wild (pet) animals and punish their keepers.

This is done in the best interests and safety of the people. The sources added the Kuwaiti Penal Code punishes those who neglect animals and the civil law punishes the owner by forcing him to compensate the victim if attacked by the wild animal.

The source pointed the concerned authorities have received several complaints accusing people of breeding wild animals such as tigers, lions and crocodiles. Meanwhile, a Kuwaiti man shot dead a crocodile with a bullet to his head after the reptile crept into his house recently in Salwa, reports Al-Rai daily.

According to reports the man was at work and his maid called him to say she could not enter the house because a big lizard was in the doorway. The man rushed home and found the ‘pet’ crocodile which had reportedly escaped from its keep from a neighboring house.

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So here's what I want to know:   What are they intending to do with the animals?  Maybe give them to some snipers like what they allowed to happen with the stray dogs in Kuwait?  I can see this being very bad.

If I were the (STUPID) owner of a wild/exotic/endangered animal and LOVED it in Kuwait, right about now, I would be thinking of ways to ship it out of the country to a game reserve somewhere.  Idiots.

US Citizen Coming to Kuwait on a Visitor Visa?

Bring several copies of the 1st page of your passport.

Stella just came through along with 3 plane loads of people.  There were only 2 copy machines; both were broken.  Well, one turned out to be unplugged and out of toner; the other was broken (yes, one of the richest countries in the world).  Kuwaiti workers just stared.  They kept calling numbers for people to stand in yet another line where 1 camera and 1 fingerprint machine took data from all passengers.

Dubai, we aint.

This is a sorry state of affairs.

I (heart) My Followers

I still find it hard to believe that anyone reads this crap, but apparently, people do.  THANK YOU all for just turning over the 1 millionth hit mark.  Who knew?

I'm going to do some tequila shots now to celebrate.  Too bad I'm alone (not really, more for me!)  Oh... right... I'll be thinking of you all.

One tequila
Two tequila
Three tequila
Floor

A MILLION!!!!

Buhbaaa

2013 seems to have been the year for house cleaning.  Que sera.

Waking up from Naptime

I've been in pathetic, whiny-girl mode for so long that I have forgotten what it is like not to be moody, bitchy, and self-absorbed.  I haven't been myself - at all.  I haven't been active or productive.  I just want to nap.  (Not even snack and nap; just nap.)

Time to snap out of it.

I'm not a quitter - and sometimes that's a problem.  I believe that you fight for what is right.  You fight for those you love. You fight to keep your relationships. You fight to maintain your friendships (that's never a problem, actually.)  You fight to keep it all together.  But at some point, all that fighting just wears you down and you realize that you've got to put faith in the Big Man Above and just let it go.  Let someone fight to be with me for a while.

I can wear a relationship into the ground in no time; mostly in an attempt to make it better.  I can't just let things go.  I would like to be one of those people that nothing phases, but just about everything does affect me.  I'm passionate about being passionate.  I get a thought stuck in my head and just dwell/chew on it until it is meaningless.

Mr. Clean got back on the scene. I shouldn't have let it happen.  But for the sake of second chances, I let him back in. He proved himself unworthy on the second round.  It was enough.  We had spent 2 hours a day talking on the phone while I was in the States; every day, all month.  Because of the time difference and Ramadan (and his sleep schedule), we talked to each other the first thing when we woke up and the last before going to sleep.  If I didn't call on time, he got upset.  He was sweet and loving and the guy that I remembered.

Coming back to Kuwait was a whole different story.  I guess he felt better with distance in between us.  Maybe he was free to do whatever he wanted while I was away and I couldn't complain about it.  When I got back, I complained.   He started ignoring me; treating me disrespectfully. Not coming to see me (he lives 5 minutes away).   He complained that I was complaining, "I want to feel free."  So, now he's free and I hope he's feelin' it. (Free, free, free!  Fly away, little bird!)   One should never have to ask for someone else to want to spend time with them.  "I'll see you soon.... Inshallah" doesn't cut it.

What happened to all the cute little notes he used to leave all over my house?  What happened to me making him breakfast in the morning because he was staying at my house?  ("Is your place magic?  I don't want to leave.")  What happened to the SMSs and flowers and pretty text message photos in the mornings or at night just because?  I went from that to being chastised for bringing him the wrong color Ray Bans from the States.  (Really?  Where is my Eid gift?  Are you serious?)

I'm taking some time off (from, at least,  telling people about my relationships).  I'm planning to be extremely busy and my calendar is already full for quite some time to come.  As my sister says, "You are funny, you're smart, you're in the best shape you've been in in years, and you've got a great ass.  You can do whatever you want."  All true.  Thank you for the AMAZING amount of support and motivational speeches you've given me lately, Caitie.  You've been a rock.

I feel like I've been in a deep fog for the past few months.  I don't really know how else to explain it.  Its like I've just been in "wait" mode.

My trip to the States with my family was nice, but I spent most of my time just being kind of out of it; suspended animation.  We had a little drama and that added to that feeling.  I can't say that I did much.  I should have taken care of more business while I was there; but didn't.  I just didn't get to it.  I should have called my friends; I didn't.  I should have seen my aunt again before I left: I didn't.

We went to the Outer Banks again.  The weather was bagorgeous, but the sea water was really cold (not that I get in there much because I'm afraid of bull sharks - and YES, they are out there and YES we have seen them!).  I played in the pool most of the time.  I tried in an unsuccessful attempt to get drunk most nights.  I guess I've just built up too much resistance.  I wished that Mr. Clean could have come with me. He was supposed to, but didn't get his visa.  Pero, everything happens for a reason.  I would have been piiiiiissed if I invited him and then he pulled his games over there.  Not cool.

Busy, busy, busy.  No more time to reflect on stupid things that won't make a difference to me in a month.

Desert Guy called me out of the blue the other night.  I don't want him back, but his timing was amazing.  He invited me to a party.  I declined.  It all comes back around, doesn't it?  I do miss our tent and living in the desert.  I don't miss anyone else - except maybe one guy who stayed clear of all the desert-drama.

Thank You, MP Al-Enezi

Arab Times

MP Askar Al-Enezi has forwarded parliamentary questions to State Minister for Cabinet Affairs Sheikh Mohammed Al-Abdullah Al-Sabah on the government’s failure to implement the law on the naturalization of 4,000 Bedouns this year.   He said the annulled December 2012 Parliament ratified the law on March 20, 2013 and it was published in the official gazette on April 7, 2013. He added the government has yet to naturalize deserving Bedouns even if four months had passed since the publication of the law.  He accused the government of disregarding the people’s will, which is represented by the MPs who passed the law to alleviate the suffering of Bedouns.

Break Time

I've decided to take a break from posting for a while.  I've received some hate mail lately and I am trying to recharge my positive energy (a month out of Kuwait and getting over Mr. Clean (actually -  just down and out dirty), so any further negative energy being sent my way is not helpful; especially as it is anonymous and unnecessary.

I don't hate anyone and that vibe will just come back to get  you later, so your bad.

A few friends have been extreeeeeeeeemely helpful lately and I am grateful for your kindness, your warmth, and your support.  Naz, Hmood, Jaber - you are stand-up guys and brothers when I need you most (anyone who says, "I am going to KICK his ASS for you!" is good in my book).  My sister and my mom have held several pep talks and turned my head around.  Stella is always my rock.  "Who was there for you?  YOU were!"

New friends have been great lately too.  The Man Above has been sending me angels right and left.

So, blogpeeps, I'll be back when my battery is back at 100%.

(I don't like Johnny Depp, but I do like this quote someone posted on Instagram...)

"There are four questions of value in life.... What is sacred?  Of what is the spirit made?  What is worth living for?  and What is worth dying for?   .......   The answer to each is the same.  Only love."

Good weekend

I had a very nice weekend:  both fun and relaxing.

Went to the US Embassy's 4th of July event sponsored by the Association of the US Army.  Anytime you can get free ice cream (shout out to KDD - LOVE YOU!!!), it is a good deal.  Combine ice cream and refreshments and it is super good.

Went from there to Kabd to see my friends.  These are the guys who had my Secret Weekend Hideout in Julai'ai that the municipality tore down.  They took my advice and went to look for a farm in Kabd instead of looking for an apartment.  OMG - did they get a GREAT deal!  It is a ba-gorgeous "farm" (you can't really call it that, but technically, everything in Kabd is supposed to be).  It has 2 villas and a grass quad.  One of the villas has a huge indoor swimming pool.  The rent?  500kd/mo. (MASHALLAH MASHALLAH MASHALLAH)  I will be there every weekend following Ramadan (only because I won't be here for the entire month).

If you don't mind living in the middle of the desert, Kabd has great property prices.

The next day, I went to see an ooooold friend.  I've known him for 30 years.  Hard to believe, but true.  He invited me to go on a trip with his group at Al Boom Dive Center.  I've done it before and had a nice time.  Unfortunately, I'm too chickenshit to dive, but I get to splash around in the water and be on a boat all day.  Normal people (the public) can do the same for 10KD a trip.  It is a great deal.  They take you out from 10am to 4pm from the marina at Khiran (30 or 40 south for about 45 minutes to an hour - depending on how fast you drive).  Going to Failaka Island is easy in Kuwait.  There are several boats to take you out there.  Getting to see Kuwait's southern islands (Um Al Moradem, Qaroh, Kubbar) isn't as easy.  Not as many services taking people out there.  Al Boom's numbers are 2483-0474 or 6620-3000. They offer courses too (check out my Facebook page for their flyer).

Saturday morning, I woke up and had what looked like a clear blister on my eyeball.  Second weekend in a row I was forced to go to a hospital.  I freaked out.  Didn't have anybody to call/drive me, so I went alone.  Had a hissy fit in the reception room; got in to see the doctor who told me that it was just an allergic reaction to something and to stop freaking.  So I did.  He gave me eye drops.  It disappeared after about 2 hours.

I didn't want any reminders of Mr. Clean in my house, so I packed up his clothes (the only man I have ever allocated closet space to) and returned them to his dad's house last night (after 3 days of notifying him that he should pick them up - and he didn't).  Instead of making me feel better, it made me feel worse.  Closure.  He just sent me (after 10 days) a 1-liner saying, "Ok... thanks."  Sigh.

I am going to miss his family so much.  Well, truth be told, I miss him like crazy.  Of course, you don't immediately remember all the bad stuff about someone, just the good.  In hindsight, things start to take shape later.  His family made me feel like part of them.  I cry every time I think of his dad.  Maybe because I lost mine and having another father figure around has been very good for the soul.  His father is such a kind and decent man.  Maybe he'll talk some sense into his son.  Dunno.  We're not in communication so I can't tell.

I get on the plane again back to the States this coming weekend.  I need some positive reinforcement from my own peeps.  I can't wait to be there with them.

Hope you all have a happy Ramadan.

The Avenues Ingres/Egres Gets on My Damn Nerves

I've wanted to write about this particular pet peeve for a while now.

I love to shop.  It's what I do.  I really like the Avenues and I have been dying to get there to check out some of the new sections.

I work. I'm not a housewife who can go shopping at 10am when there is no traffic.  I gotta go on the weekends or after work.  Most often, on the weekends because I'm too tired to do much after work.

... getting into and out of that mall makes my skin crawl.  The entrance from 5th Ring Road is a nightmare and the back entrances aren't much better.  I have actually driven out there several times, seen the traffic, and turned around and went elsewhere.

WHAT WERE THEY THINKING???

I don't get it.  You build a major mall and make it so difficult to get into that people are turned off.

It is going to be a nightmare before Eid.  Thank God, I will be in the States, shopping at malls with multiple ways in and out.

What he said

(Ok, I will go ahead and publish it.)

This, during our FIRST conversation about marriage (a "fact-finding", what-if kind of discussion)...

What he opened with:   "I WILL marry a second wife and there's nothing you can do about it."

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? 

(So maybe homeboy did actually meet a Thai girl and fall in love...)

Me (I didn't BLINK before responding):  "Um yes, there is. I DO have a choice. Islam gives women choices.  On the day that I know you are marrying someone else, you don't have to do a thing.  You don't have to move off the sofa.  I will go to court the same day and request a divorce."

Him:  Blank stare, followed by nervous laughter.

#1 without a DOUBT the most un-romantic, dispassionate, uncompassionate,  pathetic, crappy discussion of marriage that I have ever had the misfortune to participate in IN MY LIFE.  I would rather hear some guy say, "I'm horny.  Let's get married mutaa and dooooo it.."  At least in that case, there is something of advantage in that.

Why would you start a conversation about marriage with an ending?  Why don't people think before they speak? (Or maybe - just maybe - he didn't want to have the conversation at all and was trying to push me away from the idea all together.  Well yeah, that was a success....  You got me there, buddy.  Good one!  High five!)

It's like me saying (on the first conversation), "I might get itchy feet in a few years and want to hook up with another man.  When I do, I'll ask you for a divorce, marry him, and it will be done."  (I actually did say that a little later on in the conversation in retaliation.)

Men, there are 2 times when we can get you:  When you eat and when you sleep.  THINK about it.  I hope he's wondering what was really in those chocolate chip cookies I baked him.  Mmmm mmmm good....



(Sidebar:  He was there when I lost a bunch of friends - including my best friend - and I needed someone around.  God sent him to me for a reason.  He served his purpose.)

Sucky Weekend

I am so sick of sucky weekends - I can't even tell you.  They seem to be getting suckier and suckier lately and as my spiritual guides are telling me, "Giiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrl, you need to get yourself grounded and do what makes you happy.  Nature!  You need to connect with nature."  Well sheet, I thought I was doing that  - in the form of a 6'4" hunky man named Mr. Clean.  Pero alas, Mr. Clean seems to have gone the way of The Others.

Not going to write about that now.  Too fresh.  Too hurtful.  Too annoying. ... okay... maybe I will discuss it, but just a little.

Saga of Mr. Clean wasn't even the suckiest of the sucking this weekend.  Two words:  Food Poisoning.  How do I put this delicately (cause ya know I'm like a flower....)  Listen to this song.   My whole insides are cleaned out now.  I'm not sure what food caused it, but by the time I got home, I was really sick. I decided not to to to the doctor right away (because I'm a dumbass) and so I suffered through Friday night and Saturday before going on Saturday night.... alone.... all alone... miserably alone.... sniffle, whimper... to the hospital. (For some reason, my hair looked REALLY GOOD at 3 am on Sunday morning when no one was around to see it.  Shet.  ... no really... shiet.)    Got on a drip, then another drip, then they couldn't find some veins so I became The Human Pin Cushion, then I went home to a lonely house where His clothes still are hanging in the closet and cried myself to sleep.  Pa-thetic.  (I'll have to burn them later.  It feels really good and I have a bigass grill....)

Put your big girl panties on and deal with it.  No, no, put on another pair of big girl panties.  Wait, food poisoning, you might need another pair.  Dayum.  Food poisoning is no fun.

... and as you can imagine, NO ONE wants to come visit you or take care of you while you've got all that going on!  (I wouldn't.)  (But again, for some odd reason - my hair looked REALLY good - when no one was there to see it.)

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I had to stay out of work for 2 days (because you can't go far when you have "all that" going on).  Thank God (cause I do), I have bruises all over my arms from the needle marks, so the management either thinks I'm an intervenus drug user or that I really was sick... (hopefully the later).  God knows I'm creative so they might think I'm on the juice.

I have been trying to force myself to be happy for a while now.  I was happy for short amounts of time with him, but overall - not so much.  I need to reconnect with my happy clan and get back to the desert.  I've been like a camel out of sand and it's just noooo goood, baba.  I don't think some people understand this:  Live and let live.  If someone has a need to do something that makes them happy and it isn't going to hurt anyone; let them go.  I don't cheat.  I don't lie.  I won't even look at another man when I'm with someone I love. I'll even BAKE.  But if I gotta go to the desert and see some goats and maybe just maybe hang with a few friends, let me go!  You can't imprison a desert girl.  You gotta let her run.

That slut/bitch/whore Thailand has stolen TWO men from me now.  Mr. Clean just wasn't the same since he got back. They never return the same, do they?  Even if they haven't done the nasty with anything with or without a penis and/or lady parts; they still come back different.  American Girl pointed this out and I think she's completely correct.  Maybe it is the ego thing:  that women (and some not-so-much-women) of all ages are over there throwing themselves at men like they are Gods. It makes one re-evaluate what they have at home.  Maybe I didn't look so good (God knows - I did NOT look so good this weekend.)

We had The Big Talk this weekend and I think it may have put a nail in the coffin.  I'm not going to relate what he said.  However, it was NOT romantic, it was NOT passionate, and it did NOT evoke feelings of love. I did NOT want to shower him with hugs and kisses. (And because it was just The Big Talk, I did NOT get a ring - not that I was looking for one.  Girlfriend can afford her own bling, thank you very much.)   More like, I wanted to hit him over the head with  a steel reinforcement rod.  Iron frying pan.  One of those Acme weight things that Whyle Coyote uses.  And then... ladies and gentlemen, we have a runner....  He just left.  No phone calls.  Won't return calls or messages.  (Wait a minute... is this Mr. Clean or The Man???   Deja vu!  Whatsup?)

Stupid women do this:  I blamed myself. I shouldn't.  As Naz told me, "You didn't do anything wrong."  I didn't.  I don't see what else I could have done right.  I didn't initiate the conversation.  I don't even know how I feel about getting married (to his gynormous family).  But it was like the elephant in the room.  I've been surrounded by his family every weekend wondering when The Talk was going to take place.  Then, when it did, it was so disappointing.  And then he was gone and I was all alone with food poisoning and wondering what duffuq THAT was all about.

It's ok.  I wasn't looking for love when I met him. It just found me and I went with the flow.  I'm sure that when I'm least expecting it, it will find me again.  What an amazing adventure life is, isn't it?  You're in love, you're out of love, you want to kill someone, you get food poisoning, then you go on vacation.  Awesome.

I'm going to the desert tonight to run around and giggle.

Buy citizenship

CNN Online just published a list of countries in the world where you can buy citizenship.  Cool.

World's overlooked countries to buy second citizenship, residency

The tropical Caribbean island country of St. Kitts and Nevis has the world's longest-running citizenship-by-investment program. For $250,000, you get a second passport with access to nearly 130 countries. Another perk: no personal income tax.

For just $100,000 you can gain citizenship by investment to the Commonwealth of Dominica, also in the Caribbean Ocean. The country has just 73,000 people. Passport holders have visa-free access to about 85 countries.

Those interested in buying citizenship through investment should keep watch on the Caribbean island nation of Antigua and Barbuda. The government could make it legal as early as the summer of 2013.

In Europe, Austria is the only country where citizenship by investment is possible, says Henley & Partners. 

In Hong Kong, citizenship by investment is not a possibility, but residency by investment is. With a $1.3 million investment, you can enjoy one of the lowest tax rates in the world and heavily-subsidized, well-regarded public health care.

Singapore has its Global Investor Program where applicants can invest $2 million for permanent residency. Citizenship is possible after two years. 

Australia launched the Significant Investor Visa program in November 2012. The scheme targets high-worth individuals and asks for $4.7 million in investment. After four years, holders can apply for permanent residency. Citizenship is also possible. 

You go, girl!

Lebanese wife thrahes her husband for flirting with her friend

Kuwait Times

Kuwait: A married couple was released from the Maidan Hawally police station Monday after the wife signed a document promising not to physically assault her husband again in the future. The Lebanese man had earlier approached the police and handed over a medical diagnosis report reflecting several bruises on his body. The man filed a complaint against his wife saying that the bruises were a result of her physical assaults.

The Lebanese woman was summoned for investigations, during which she confirmed that she hit her husband after her friend told her that he had flirted with her. The case was resolved when the man agreed to drop the charges once the wife signed the document; which she did only after he promised not to flirt with any of her friends again.

Kuwaiti Serial Rapist Arrested

Arab Times, 26 June

Kuwaiti Nabbed For Raping Many ‘Home Alone’ Women

KUWAIT CITY, June 24 

Police have arrested a Kuwaiti criminal for sneaking into the homes of women and raping them after ensuring there was no male in the house, reports Al-Rai daily.  The arrest came after several Kuwaitis filed complaints with the Salwa Police Station accusing the man of sneaking into their homes and raping their wives.  The victims are believed to be three Kuwaitis, a Syrian and a Briton. They identified the suspect from pictures shown by police. After the man was taken into custody police records showed he was wanted by law in connection with drugs cases.

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Anywhere else in the world, they would be stressing the severity of the crime and that it was committed by a SERIAL RAPIST (that means, in a series of similar crimes).  They write the article as matter-of-factly as it was about someone breaking into homes and stealing satellite dishes.  WTF!  

If someone were committing similar violent crimes in the same neighborhood, why wouldn't the police publicize it to warn others?  (Well okay... it took them months of child rapes before they publicized the Hawalli Monster cases...)   FIVE women were raped IN THEIR HOMES in SALWA.  Why does this country continue to take major violent crimes against women as if they are something inconsequential and minor?  

And this is very poorly written.  Who cares if there were no males in the house?  The women could have been single or elderly or whatever.  They were home invasions and rapes.  Did it matter to the story that "several Kuwaitis filed complaints"?  Wow.  "Complaints".   It makes it sound as if there is a noise disturbance.  Who cares what nationality of people filed the cases?  Does it make a difference that they were Kuwaiti?  What if they had been any other nationality?  

My Advice to Western Companies Seeking Sponsorship in Kuwait

You can read a previous post about a recent case where a Western company, GLS, had employees who were "held captive on bases" because of a contract dispute with their sponsor. [They weren't literally held captive, but I believe they chose to stay there because  if they left the camps (because we don't have "bases" in Kuwait), they would be jailed and deported.]  I have heard that these employees are being assisted in leaving.  The sponsor company has asked GLS for $20 Million to transfer the employees, but that is kind of a mute point when the employees have been deported/have to leave the country (and are blacklisted).  The employees went through Hell (I believe unnecessarily) and now GLS' reputation is tainted globally through the media.

Although I don't know much about the case directly, what I believe the underlying cause was is a lack of understanding of Kuwaiti laws.  I think the company, GLS, perhaps connected with a company that they didn't know that much about and then (perhaps - and I'm only speculating)  didn't provide enough information to their employees - or provided inappropriate information.

Here is my advice to any Western company seeking a sponsor (or sponsorS) in Kuwait.  And by the by:  You don't need to commit to ONE sponsor company exclusively for all your employees in Kuwait.  Large companies working in Kuwait are catching on to this.  You can work with several and if one isn't doing the job for  you, stop using them later.  Don't put all your eggs in one basket.  Risk management.

Do your homework!  Due diligence!!!  Just because a sponsor company has a member of the royal family attached to it somehow does NOT mean that they are ethical and/or will get your job done.  (OMG -  the stories!!!)  That affiliation sounds like a great selling point, but get references, check around.  Check the reputation of the person or people you are dealing with regardless of who they are.

Sometimes, Littleshittycompany LLC has an Egyptian mandoob (government liaison for the company/gopher/expediter)  who is actually doing all their work for them, is beloved at ministries, and has kept Littleshittycompany LLC's reputation in check for the past 25 years by having tea with the big boys in government offices.  These guys git 'er done here.  If a company has fired a succession of mandoobs, move on/look elsewhere.  The mandoob is the key to successful completion of all the paperwork.  And employees, never ever underestimate the power of your sponsor company's mandoob.  Bake them some damn cookies.  Buy their kid a gift.  Do whatever it takes to suck up.  Need something done?  You gotta scratch some backs.

And people please:  Verify, verify, verify!  Ask for important items to determine if a company is on the up-and-up/legit:

• A current Kuwait business license (it will be in Arabic.  Establish a prior relationship with a translator.)
• References from current or former sponsored companies (POC current/active e-mail addresses so that you can contact them yourselves.  Do not rely on their "outstanding references")
• Financial statements - 3 years back or more.  Audited by a big 4 company?
• Who is the authorized signatory and is he/she in Kuwait often?  Ask for a copy of the authorized signatory letter (Arabic).  (Note that the authorized signatory should be the ONLY person signing contracts/official documents with your foreign company - no one else.   Otherwise, the document may not be legal.)
• Insurance:  DBA Insurance (or knowledge of how to obtain it).  Private healthcare (who do they deal with - ask to see several options).
• Ask if they have the ability to "Open files"/sponsor X number of employees under Article 18 visas. 
• Ability to assist in obtaining drivers licenses in Kuwait
• Ask for certification (in writing) that no other company they have sponsored in X years has filed court cases against them. 
• Ask if they have any branches outside of Kuwait (may help you if you need to litigate later).
• Additionals:  Accommodations:  ask to see where they will be housing employees (or referring employees for housing).  Transportation:  What types of vehicles?  How old?  Does the sponsor company have any established relationships in order to offer your employees discounts? (Ok, now you are just messin' with them!)
• Name(s) of company mandoobs.  How many years in service to the company.
• (Probably more that I can't think of right now and feel free to chime in on comments.)

I was asked (by a sponsoring company) to complete a  due diligence questionnaire for a Western company (ok, I'll just say it - it was Honeywell)  to fill out before they would even consider working with them.  Those guys have it together.  That's the way you do it.  Send it out to several/many potential sponsoring companies and ask them to attach the above.  If they are professional, they'll be able to complete it.  If not, move on.

The sponsor company WILL be taking your money.  That's how they are in business.  They need to PROVE to you that they are worthy BEFORE you start doing business with them; not just when you need them to expedite a drivers license or (God forbid) when you have to take them to court for something.  The sponsor company WILL be responsible for the well-being of your employees while in Kuwait.  This is a very important role.  Why take chances?

And Western companies please - before you even think about doing business in Kuwait - Begin and maintain a good relationship with a Kuwaiti commercial lawyer/firm.  There are many. Some are ABA registered.  Have them draft/review your sponsorship agreement.  Put them on retainer so that if you need to ask questions (or have them write letters to your sponsor company to keep them in line) they are at your disposal.  Know your rights and the rights of your employees under the laws of Kuwait.  If you were in the US or Europe, you wouldn't play around with the laws or employee obligations; why would  you do it in a foreign company where there is so much more risk?

Which sponsoring company in Kuwait do I recommend right now?  Defcon Support (www.defconsupport.com) is run by an American who sponsors companies in Kuwait. (Note that in order to sponsor people in Kuwait, the company must be owned 51% by a Kuwaiti and I don't know who his Kuwaiti partner is.)  Se habla English and have good contacts with the American/Western community in Kuwait as well as Western embassies.

Western Employees:  
You should ask the company you are going to work for if they have done their homework.  Ask, in writing, if the employing company has done due diligence on the sponsor company.  Ask for DETAILS of the sponsor company (name, name of executives, website, etc.).  God forbid you should need it later, but you might.  How many Westerners have I asked, 'So, who is your sponsor?'  "I dunno."  Or - if they do know:  'What is the name of the owner/principal?'  "I dunno.  I don't remember.  Al something."  No! No! No!  Bad employee!  Are you crazy??  Sponsor means you are under their control for the duration of your time in Kuwait.

Lemme break it down to reach a certain target audience:
It is like staying at someone's house in another state/city/country.  You don't know Flana (your Kuwaiti sponsor company) very well, but she's invited  you and your friend, Bob, (your employer)  to come on over.  Sounds good:  You like to travel and see new things and the price is right.   You don't know who Flana is  or what her address is.  You just don't bother with the details because hey - it's all good.  Flana seems nice.  You hop on a plane..... Then....  You're staying at Flanas and go out for a while and can't remember how to get back to her house  in a taxi. You don't have her address or last name.   Once you finally get back there, Flana has wigged out and locked the door.  She's acting all weird and has just gone pompei and put all your stuff out on the lawn after taking the money from your wallet! WTF!   (Betcha didn't see THAT comin'.)  What's up with Flana?  Who is this person?   Forget that Bob is staying there too.  Bob's not going to help you get back home. Bob didn't know Flana any better than you did when you decided to go visit.  (He was just looking at you with that same big stupid grin on his face when he thought he was getting a comfortable ride.) Bob is in the same dilemma and doesn't  know what's going on either.  You're both screwed because you haven't done your homework.  (Did you ask someone about Flana's recent problems with the law or that she has a mental disorder?)  Didn't your mother ever tell you to keep a quarter and taxi fare in your pocket just in case?  Did you listen?

Here's your quarter and taxi fare:
Do you have a Kuwaiti lawyer who is going to help you? Do you know how to find one should something happen?   Learn about where you are going (and how to get back).  You can't just rely on the embassy to help you out.  That's your responsibility.  The embassy has a listing of lawyers, but are they going to take your case?    What if one day you stop receiving your paycheck?  Whatchagonnado?  Plan in advance.  Make friends.  Establish contacts.

People - know your rights.  Download the Kuwait labor law.  You're an adult.  Act like one. (Both employers and employees.)   Don't just fly off without a plan.

BAM - Another Parliament

The latest newest newest new parliament has been dissolved and there is now a "one man (actually "person") one vote" law.  I agree with the law.  I think that's what it should be.  However, the way the governorates/voting districts are divided/populated does give an advantage to pro-Government voters and it could be that Kuwait will later look into re-division.

So... Here's what I don't get....

If there is what some call an unfair advantage, why would the opposition want to boycott yet another parliamentary election?  What is the point in that?  They will never be able to affect change in anything.  They will never be able to table this issue because ... hey... they're not there.

Isn't this kind of cutting off your nose to spite your face?

So far, the news has been kind of sketchy about boycott on or boycott off.  I don't think anyone thought this far.  Yup, the word "planning" isn't very popular around these parts.  I'm trying to keep up with the Kuwaiti news (no, not the newspapers or TV, but "Telephone, telefax, tell-a-Kuwaiti." - the best way to keep informed here).

Whutup, Kuwait?

Super Moon

How do you feel about changing your Facebook status under the relationship section?  A friend of mine got married a few years ago and all our mutual friends were giving him grief because he hadn’t changed his relationship to “married.”  So, I thought about changing my relationship status and I actually did – for about an hour – until my friend, Auditgirl,  started sending me frantic messages, “What are you DOING?!  How many times have I told you that there are bad people out there with hot eyes?!  Take it down!”, followed by her usual, “Are you mad at me, habibti?”  She’s so sweet and well-intentioned ... and right.  So I immediately took it down. 

Mr. Clean was so happy to see our new status (Mashallah Mashallah) publicized that he called me to thank me.  Slow your roll, baby, not yet.  Too many hot eyes.

I don’t know how much I can say on the blog now without jinxing myself and my relationship.  I’ll just keep the details under wraps for a while.

I haven’t felt like leaving my house lately (toooo freakin hot!)  in my free time, so rather than poppin in a work-out DVD (Hip Hop Abs is still my favourite – Sean T!!!), I’ve started baking.  Yeah, that’s right.  Me.  I made the fam a big box of assorted cookies the week before Mr. Clean got back to Kuwait:  Brownies, coconut-chocolate (“Eagle brand magic cookies” – look them up, soooo good), apricot Czech cookies, and Toll House.  I ran out of butter by the time I got to the Toll House and had to substitute Greek yogurt – which actually went over better than the ones I made with butter.  I really didn’t sample much myself, believe it or not.  It was just a time-filler.

 

I know – fasssssscinating, right?  Yeah.  Ok.  Snore.

Last night, we drove down to the Saudi border to see Super Moon.  I’ve been getting all these stupid Instagram and Twitter and Facebook messages advertising/glorifying Super Moon.  SUPER MOON!!!  How could I miss that event?  So, we went for a drive out of the city.  Just kept driving.  I had never been down that road before (290 in Nuwaiseeb).  I recognized the mosque because that's where Bunny's Maxima ended up something like 4 months after they stole it from outside his house. We ended up driving up on the fence that divides Saudi Arabia and Kuwait.  It is a long, chain link fence with barbed wire on the top.  If anybody ever wanted to infiltrate Saudi Arabia (or Kuwait), it would not be difficult.  It was kind of cool because it was yet another piece of Kuwait that I hadn’t explored before.  There are two (what appear to be) gate houses on either side of the road.  Someone has written in Arabic, “Djinnis live here.”  Mr. Clean is so superstitious that he starts with the “owwwdibillah”s.  I giggle and wish I had my laser pointer to really freak him out.    I want to go back there during the day and take photos (maybe not too close to the fence – I don’t know if that’s allowed).  There were also some cool-looking chalets down there; one in particular with a tower that was all lit up.  Kind of out of place on the landscape, but very cool.  So were the gerbils running across the road and into the desert.  I loves me some gerbils.

Anyhoo, so with the exception of people driving like hywanat (animals) as usual during this time of the month, no one would even have noted that it was a full moon.  It wasn’t that exceptional.  Just another full moon.  Maybe a little brighter, but ... eh... not so much.  At least I had a lovely drive with Mr. Clean and a nice talk.

Stella and my Irish Cousin are here visiting.  I love it when they’re around.  We’re such a happy mixed-bag family.  I lie in bed in the morning thinking of reasons why I shouldn’t get out of bed and then think, ‘Oh (expletive).  Stella is here.  (She’s still my boss.)  I better get my (expletive) out of bed and go to work pronto.’ And then when I finally do get my (expletive) up and go to the kitchen where she has always got a pot of coffee ready for me (because she’s a Type A and rises at Dawn’s crack), she looks at me and says, “Do we really have to go to work?”  Gotta love it. 

Contract dispute leaves 100 Americans stranded on US Army bases

Someone sent me the link to this on my Facebook site this morning.  It is the first I've heard of it.  Some companies are REALLY lowering the bar on unethical behavior.  OMG.  I hope that folks in the US are equally as "hospitable" should the company owners ever venture to the US....

Captive in Kuwait: Contract dispute leaves 100 Americans stranded on US Army bases

By Cristina Corbin

Published June 18, 2013

FoxNews.com

At least 100 American citizens have been trapped for months on two U.S. bases inside Kuwait after local police unjustly issued warrants for their arrest, a U.S. defense contractor told FoxNews.com.

Most of the Americans were working as Arabic translators for Global Linguist Solutions, which ended a lucrative deal with its sponsoring Kuwaiti subcontractor, Al Shora International General Trading & Contracting and signed on with another company. Sources told FoxNews.com Al Shora's managing director is the sister-in-law of the Kuwaiti prime minister.

When the contract ended Feb. 17, Al Shora refused to transfer the employees' visas to the new Kuwaiti subcontractor and falsely accused the Americans of being "runaways and absconders," according to Charles Tolleson, president of Global Linguist Solutions. His company has barred workers from leaving the bases since May 31 to protect them from arrest and imprisonment. 

"We don’t see any hope. We’re dealing with a corrupt company in Kuwait that has fabricated charges against us."  - American citizen trapped on U.S. base in Kuwait.  "My biggest concern is the safety and security of my employees in Kuwait," he said. 

One of the employees, who contacted FoxNews.com Tuesday morning from Camp Buehring, said, "If we leave the base, we could be arrested by the Kuwaiti authorities, jailed or deported."

"We cannot see the doctor even for an emergency," said the woman, who asked that her name not be used. "Everybody here is under stress because a lot of us here need to go home. Our families are worried about us. We need to see our kids... We don’t see any hope. We’re dealing with a corrupt company in Kuwait that has fabricated charges against us."

She said the Al Shora's managing director "cancelled all of our visas here, so we became illegal."

Camp Buehring is in the Kuwaiti desert, about 25 miles south of the Iraqi border. Other employees of Global Linguistics are similarly stuck at Camp Arifjan, another U.S. Army base inside Kuwait.

Al Shora is demanding $22 million from Global Linguistics in order to transfer the employees' visas to the new company, Kuwaiti Resources House, sources said. Under Kuwaiti law, foreigners cannot work in the country unless they are under the sponsorship of a private Kuwaiti company. 

After his company re-bid its contract several months ago and opted to chose the new Kuwaiti company, "Al Shora basically embarked on a campaign to destroy my company," Tolleson said.

"There’s no contract dispute. I don’t even have a contract with them anymore," he said of Al Shora. "If a sponsor is no longer a sponsor, they are required to simply transfer [the visas] to the new sponsor. This happens all the time. They won’t do that, and that violates the terms of their former contract."

A representative from the Kuwaiti prime minister's office said he was not aware of the situation.  "This is the first time I heard about this," the representative, who declined to give his name, told FoxNews.com. "This kind of behavior has never happened."

He had no comment when asked if the Al Shora's managing director was related to Kuwaiti Prime Minister Jaber Al-Mubarak Al-Hamad Al-Sabah

Tolleson said that when he approached the U.S. military about the situation, "I was told this is my problem."

The office for the U.S. Ambassador to Kuwait referred all inquiries on the matter to the U.S. State Department.

“The U.S. Embassy in Kuwait is aware of the commercial dispute involving a Department of Defense contractor and a local Kuwaiti company," Beth Gosselin, as a State Department spokeswoman, told FoxNews.com. "That dispute has had an impact on a number of private U.S. citizens working in Kuwait. 

"The protection of U.S. citizens overseas is one of our highest priorities," Gosselin added. "The U.S. Embassy is working with the private U.S. citizens and is providing them with appropriate consular assistance. The Embassy continues to monitor the situation closely and is encouraging an immediate resolution to this difficult issue."

At least three of the linguists reportedly spent seven days in a crowded, filthy jail after being caught outside their base. Majdi Abdulghani was detained by police May 9, as he prepared to board a plane on an approved trip to Jordan to visit his sick mother, the military newspaper Stars and Stripes reported.  He spent seven days in jail before being flown back to the U.S., according to the newspaper.  

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/world/2013/06/18/captive-in-kuwait-contract-dispute-leaves-100-americans-stranded-on-us-army/#ixzz2WkDytCmP