The psychological toll of the constant threat of deportation

"Deportation" has become the new buzzword among lawmakers in Kuwait. You're not cool if you can't create a law that says that someone is going to get deported these days.   You can be deported for barbecuing, for partying, for various traffic offenses, for various visa offenses... the list goes on and on and there seems to be a new deportation law coming out every week.

I've been depressed for a year.  I guess I didn't realize how bad it has affected me until I took steps back to look at what is going on in my life.  Ok, there are other incidents which have led to my feeling down, but every week, I worry about something else.

Now, it is walking my dog.

Every day when I finish work, I go home, get my dog, and take him out for a walk.  One he became large (he's a German Shepherd), I stopped walking him in my neighborhood and at our local walking track to avoid the possibility of scaring, startling, upsetting anyone who fears big dogs.  (Other large breed dog owners in my neighborhood continue to walk their dogs at the track.)  I put my dog in my car, and usually drive several miles from my house to Engifa or the beach close to it.  I thought I was being considerate.

A law has just been put into effect stating that large breed "dangerous" dogs can not be walked on beaches or in public areas.  So my drive will be longer.  Now, I am going to have to take my dog somewhere to a desert so that he can have decent exercise.  How am I going to accomplish this in a sports car?  I am going to have to buy a 4x4.

Why?  Because instead of deporting me, they will do the unthinkable:  take my dog.  (and do what with him and who will determine that? Who knows because these new laws are vague and seemingly subjective.). You see, Kuwait still sees pets as "things" as material.  To SOME of us, our pets are our family members.  My older dog has been with me for 18 years; through wars and troubles and boyfriends and jobs.  My big boy is still basically a puppy. I don't have family in Kuwait;  my pets ARE my family.  And like my human family, IF anyone tried to harm them or take them from me, I would unleash a level  of crazy unheard of in several centuries of history.

I've been in Kuwait for 18 years.  I didn't come to Kuwait for money.  I came because I loved Kuwait (even before I arrived here).   That was then.  This recent Kuwait is depressing and almost intolerable.  While I am grateful for a great job and other benefits of living in Kuwait, it is depressing.  Sometimes you can't feel how oppressive it is until you leave.

When you are trying to live your life in peace and contentment, how is that accomplished when you have a sword  constantly dangling above your head?

Life is too short.

Now, some of you readers have commented that I'm stupid and I should know by now that none of this is ever going to be enforced and blah blah blah....  Ok fine, but I believe those people commenting were probably not foreigners living in Kuwait.  Kuwaitis don't have to worry about being kicked out (well, that's not true, but it would take a lot more and it is a totally different subject all together).  Kuwaitis aren't going to lay in bed at night thinking about what MIGHT happen because you broke the latest recent-most-stupid-law.  Some people don't do that - I do.  I worry.  I think worst-case-scenario first and then I can go back from there.

I know I'm lucky.  I know I'm from a country that has preferential treatment in Kuwait.  I have Kuwaiti friends that I could call on (but I rarely rarely do).  But I still worry about it.  Probably because I love Kuwait and consider it home.  So the mere threat of all this deportation stuff is damaging.  It's negative.  It's bad.  And if I'm feeling this way; how are others who are less fortunate feeling?  Sorry, but a threat is a threat and there is no way to look at it as a positive/pleasant experience.  It is bullying - and on a national level.


NOTE:

This is a perspective blog:  MY perspective. How I feel.  I'm not the frickin voice of my people.  I can only add my voice.  You don't have to like it, but you don't have to read it either.  I'm not blogging out of a need for additional readers to collect advertising fees.  I don't give a rats smelly ass about stats.  I blog because I enjoy it.  I tell it like I see it.  Quite a few people have commented on MY blog lately using quite negative and even insulting language to express their dislike of MY perspective.  To which I say (as I have said before and will say again):  NO ONE is holding a gun to your head, forcing you to read this.  If you dislike, disagree with, or just get pissed off with what I have to say:  stopfuckingreading it.  Create your own blog.  Vent your opinion there. I'm not Fox f-ing news.  I'm the author of a teeny weeny little blog in a teeny weeny little country writing about my teeny weeny view of things.  That's it.  There is no conspiracy.  I think I will stop allowing comments for a while because I CHOOSE not to partake in other people's negativity.  The drama is destructive to my chi and that, my friends, is no f-ing way to start a new year.