Valentine's Day "Gift"

I’ve written about this before.  He was the love of my life.  I met him when I was 15. He was 19.  He changed my world the day I saw his face.  He changed my world again the day I learned he was dead (many years later on Valentine’s Day).

The night before (years ago this very day), he came to me in a dream.  We were sitting in a garden in DC.  He held my hand as he told me that the days he spent with me were the happiest days in his life.  It has turned out to be the best gift he could have given me on any day:  A parting gift that has remained embedded with me as if it was yesterday. His gift.  Who gets that? 

This year, I got another gift from Helen DaVita, the medium lady who came to visit Kuwait.   You can read about my experience with her on my post, “My visit with a lovely medium.”  She helped me understand the real circumstances surrounding his death – and also reminded me facts about his life that I had forgotten.  I, like many others, thank her for giving us some peace of mind; and for reaffirming what I already knew:

Shamlan is around me.  I feel him there sometimes.  I'm always thinking about him and remember him in little ways - always on Valentine's Day.  Yeah, it is bitter-sweet, but I still see that powerful, life-altering,  never-ending kind of love to be a tremendous blessing.  It is timeless and ageless. Valentine's Day is just a reminder of that.

--- I'm back in Dubai this February 13 and I'm feeling more surrounded by him than ever.  He's here.  This is his place.  I'm glad to be close today.

Have a Sexy Kuwait Valentine's Day with this!

Disclaimer:  Ok, the owner of this bakery might be a little upset that I used that as a title, but I do this with good intentions:  Honestly, it gets me much more traffic having anything with "sex" and "Kuwait" in the title than anything else I could possibly do.  

Still looking for the "sexy" part?  Yeh, ya pervs!  Sexy cakes.  
After all, who doesn't get turned on by.... CAKE!  yeah.

CRUMBS BAKERY, Y'alls!

I have a bunch of guy friends and I never know what to get them as gifts, so baked goods are always a good idea.  I was searching on 965flowers.com for "male-appropriate" gift items.  It is a hard call to find something that is even slightly masculine and that they might actually enjoy.  Yes, I've sent flowers before, but that can get some giggles in the office, so I try not to offend/embarrass (unless it is on purpose and then it is just purple ALL the way).

I placed 2 orders from CRUMBS Bakery through 965flowers.com.  I chose them purely for aesthetic reasons:  they made a nice presentation and the baked goods looked like they could be gender-appropriate. I sent one box as a thank-you gift to a friend at the US Embassy (and dude please - any time you want to invite me back, it has been a YEAR now.  I sent BAKED GOODS!); and the other to a friend who had a birthday recently (an assortment of cake balls in a nice box).

Following my last order, I got THE most professional response from CRUMBS that I've ever had anywhere.  Now, this was the type of "how did we do?" note that I would send if I owned a business.  It was sincere and showed that they really cared.  I sent her back a note thanking her for the effort she extended through the e-mail; and  that I was embarrassed because I've never actually tried their offerings before, but I ordered due to the reasons I mentioned above.  What happened next (unsolicited because you know me - I don't do that) made my whole week:  She sent me a "Love Box" (first photo above - it is about a 12" square box maybe 5" deep) and a little bouquet of pink roses.  Awwwwwwwwwww.  (Why aren't men like this???)  What an incredibly kind thing to do!

I am now singin' their praises, my friends.  Not only pretty, but really really delicious.  It was melt-in-your-mouth kind of quality.  (I'm so used to getting dried-out, flavorless sweets that these really rocked my world!)  I highly recommend them.  Professional, respectful, considerate, sincere - AND with outstanding, well-presented, FRESH, and well- prepared products.

Readers!  Please feel free to send me more of these.  I was forced to share the first box with friends, so I have a legitimate excuse for "needing" more!  Yummmm.

All in time for Valentine's Day (This Friday - February 14)!  

965flowers.com takes credit card orders.  Go for it!

The gift box the sent me (first photo above)  is called Love Gift Box and it's KD20. KD1 charge for delivery.

Y'alls can order through 965flowers if you prefer online payment (and you can also add items like cards, flowers, teddy bears, and balloons). Otherwise you can order directly by calling or sending an email.

Contact details:

Shaab Sea Side Tel: 2263-6614 or 5527-8627
Fintas Tel: 2390-8421 or 5010-8886
www.crumbs.com.kw
twitter & instagram @ilovecrumbs
facebook.com/crumbs.kw

Orders are only by calling or email to orders@crumbs.com.kw. 

(You can just call them and tell them to send to "Desert Girl" and they will know where to deliver.  I have made it SOOOOOOOOOOOO easy for you!)

Make your loved-people happy this Valentine's Day.  Life is too short not to miss milestones and little moments. Time passes so quickly, my friends.  Moments are too precious to waste.  Doooooooo it!

Funny Ads

As seen in Al Hadaf classifieds...

Too many things to say about the catering opportunity....

And yup, pumping your p will definitely make you more handsome.

Doubts Over Mixed Marriages Article

So I got pissed off enough to write a letter to the editor after reading this story.  I don't know if it will be published in the Kuwait Times or not.  We'll see.  Her full story is here:  http://news.kuwaittimes.net/doubts-mixed-marriages/

Dear Editor:

Muna Al-Fuzai has written a second article on her perspective on "mixed marriages". The first article appeared approximately one year ago. She seems fascinated by the subject, although married to a Kuwaiti of the same religion.

From Ms. Al-Fuzai's tone, it sounds almost as if her husband has either married another woman or has considered it; leading her to jealousy or petty speculation. Perhaps the object of his eye is blonde with blue eyes as she seems to point towards this with the statement of, "...fulfils their fantasies of getting married to a Western woman with blue eyes and blonde hair..."  (as if there are not hundreds if not thousands of single or divorced Kuwaiti women with dyed blonde hair and blue contact lenses.)   

She goes on to say that, "According to some sources (and she does not name the "sources" revealing a lack of journalistic integrity), these woman are most likely homeless back home and broke.  So they use Islam to solve their personal troubles."  Wow.  Fascinating.  I know of not even one Western woman (blonde or otherwise) who has ever come to Kuwait "homeless or broke."  They have usually come here for work of some kind and have the means to move around the globe freely (financially and otherwise).  And none of the Western women I have ever met during my twenty years in Kuwait have ever married for any reason other than love and respect.

As she is a Muslim woman, I question why she is questioning.  "The increase of such marriages has more negative outputs than good, and yet we are still watching these cases with no one trying to seek the root of the problem..." To which I say, Ms. Al-Fuzai, read the Holy Quran!  It has been written and it has not been changed.  

"The fact that these women accept to stand in line with other women shows how desperate they are...."  and  "... especially if each party has his or her own agenda to hook themselves to a stranger in a serious bond like marriage." Isn't the divorce rate among Kuwaitis (of the same religion, often through arranged marriages where both parties are basically "hooking themselves to a stranger) over 50%?  Shame on you, Ms. Al-Fuzai, to stand in judgement of your own sisters and your own religion!  

Just for the record, the male Kuwaitis I have spoken to do not want to divorce because of their children.  So perhaps Ms. Al-Fuzai should write an informative article on the need for upgrading family law in the country to allow for better custody rights for fathers.

- - - End - - -

I  find it hard to believe that for many years, Ms. Al-Fuzai was Secretary of the AMERICAN Business Council of Kuwait.  Now that she is no longer in her salaried position, representing AMERICAN interests in Kuwait, she can voice her obvious contempt for Western women.  I wonder how it must have been for her to see Western women with Kuwaiti men during her tenure,  and having had to keep her true feelings hidden so that she could conduct business.  What a heavy burden to carry all that time!

On another note:    I always think that if you're not happy in a marriage, your children are going to suffer.  If  you stay together; they learn that it is ok to be unhappy in marriage.  If you divorce, they suffer because they may not receive the support of both parents.   Either way - not a good thing.  I am the product of a happy divorce.  I believe my parents were much better off away from each other, although my parents were always civil to each other and shared  visitation rights.  They never spoke ill of each other in front of us.  Life is too short to be unhappy.  People are not chained to each other.  And if either party (man or woman) is not happy at home, chances are that they are seeking happiness elsewhere.

Glamping: Kuwait Style Camping

The glamorous camping (glamping) that we do in Kuwait is not the camping of my childhood in the States.  As kids, got pup tents and canned kidney beans, while the adults got to sleep in the warm trailer.  We spent long, scary nights at national parks or camp-sites for pay where there was often no running water.  The worst places had outhouses.  I stopped ever being able to use them after one cross-America camping trip with the family.  As tweenagers, we always shined our flashlights down the outhouse hole to make sure no monsters were going to grab us and pull us in.  In Nebraska, the monsters came in the form of a pit filled with writhing black snakes. 

My foray into Kuwaiti camping came the first winter I was in Kuwait.  I can’t call it glamorous.  Just a few tents, nothing special, up in Salmi.  We were there because my friends promised to take me gerbil hunting.  Gerbil hunting is the funniest thing you can do this side of legal; especially if  you go with “hunters” wearing national attire and you might have had something to drink before you left on the adventure.  We never did catch a gerbil.  I was laughing so hard that I wouldn’t have noticed anyways.  It was pure slapstick humour.  Here’s how it’s done:   Get a bunch of friends, gloves,  and a 4 wheel drive.  Similar to a Chinese fire drill, when the jeep comes to a halt after seizing a gerbil’s fixed gaze into the headlights, all vehicle occupants rush out and try to catch the gerbil by hand.  Weapon use is prohibited.   Nonplussed, we returned to sit in the cold tent when, ironically, a gerbil ran in, made a circuit around us, and ran back out. The perfect ending to a great night.

As I later made friends with other single Western female friends, the camp invitations started pouring in.  These were not overnight or extended visits; it was more like going to a nightclub with your girlfriends (without the bouncers or long lines).  We wore high heels and mini-skirts and lots of perfume like all the other girls there.  At that time, squat toilets in some camps made for some thrilling moments.  Balancing yourself, inebriated, in high heels over a squat toilet and perfecting your aim when a cold wind swirls around your nether-region isn’t for everybody;  only the strong-willed survive.

Camping has evolved even during the almost-20 years I’ve been in Kuwait.  For example, I have visited very few camps lately that still have squat toilets.  They have been replaced by the sit-down type (that you can later find after camping season ends April 1^st littering the desert). 

Sure camping started out as a Bedouin nomadic custom out of necessity.  Tents were mobile homes moved to better grazing grounds.  When people settled into houses, they would still go out to the deserts to camp – especially when the kids were out of school, usually in the Spring when the weather wasn’t too hot yet nor too cold. 

Everything has changed.  It isn’t as family-oriented now, but rather a form of escapism in a society where alcohol and public dancing are illegal.  From November 1 to April 1, the deserts in Kuwait are transformed into cities of tents and lights.  The norm is nightclub-quality sound systems and disco lighting, outdoing the neighbours with barrier lighting systems (latest trends include multi-colored LED displays), and of course, lots of loud ATV’s (known here as “bungees”) that young children without helmets can drive up and down all night (and later give business to local hospitals and clinics).  Now, dune buggies with full-sized car engines (the likes of Corvette V8s) can be seen ripping across the sands with music blasting.

I’ve been to camps with paved/tiled walkways with outdoor lighting leading to individual sleeping tents containing flat screen TVs, HVAC units, waterbeds, and bathrooms with marble fixtures as well as sanitary ware (including Jacuzzis) that would rival what you would find in some of the finer home magazines.  I’ve seen everything you can imagine being trucked in:  A New Years Eve party tent that would put Ringling Brothers big top to shame; housing 5 bars and several dance floors.  A tent modelled after a trendy bar in Los Angeles with flowing white curtains, white lights,  black marble flooring and a black marble fireplace.  Tents with old, large brick fireplaces.  Decorating feats for temporary living.  At the end of it all, what can be re-used is packed into Conex containers and stored for the summer.

A Kuwaiti camp video went viral on the internet in Kuwait several years ago.  Someone dug out an enormous multi-levelled pit  in the desert.   From the outside, it appeared to be just another incongruous beige desert tent.  From the inside, it was a nightclub with a stage and a roped VIP section.

Businesses have sprouted to cater to campers.  Tent companies and outfitters have made fortunes off the season.  I’ve heard of tents selling for as much as $150,000.  And the peripherals:  furnishings, electric systems, sound systems, generators, plumbing, wiring, ceramic and marble work, kitchen equipment, heaters, air conditioners, satellite and internet service, lighting, fencing, pest control (think scorpions and snakes), caterers, DJ’s, and grounds-keepers/guards.    Even restaurants (including Pizza Hut) and some salons will deliver their  services your camp if you give them the GPS coordinates.

For those who want to do it on the cheap, there is a camping scrap yard in Mina Abdullah where various camping stuff has been either salvaged or sold. It is a weird and funky place close to Camp Arifjan where you can find everything from tent posts to used water tanks to the fabric woven from camel hair used in “bait shaar” (hair house) tents.  The entire place looks like something out of a Mad Max movie.

I became addicted to live-in camping last year when I shared a tent with a friend in a quiet area near Wafra and spent every free hour there.  This year, I have my own tent for the first time in probably the busiest/noisiest camping area in Kuwait:  Julai’ia.  We are a group of approximately 10 friends with a compound of tents.  My tent is a 6x6 metre tent; others are either the same size or larger.  All of the sleeping tents have comfortable beds (mine is a queen sized pillow-top) and bathrooms with porcelain sanitary ware and tiled floors.  Most of the sleeping tents have flat-screen televisions.  We have a very large tent for parties and we occasionally bring in live bands.  There are a few tents for when it is warmer and the sides can be removed. When it is cold, everybody has a heater (or two or three) for their tent.   We have 2 mini-ponies,  a goat, a bunch of chickens, and several visiting dogs.  We also have several “diwaniya” style tents where friends come and go; with or without invitation, all are welcome. 

Expat friends ask how you could set up your own camp.  These days, the facilities have become so abundant that it is easy.  If you just want to go with the family over a weekend, you can either rent an entire camp or a tent on a commercial compound.  Unfortunately, most of the companies just advertise in Arabic.  There are many rental camps in Julai’ia (off 40 between 240 and 245 roads at the turn where the temporary police station is set up during camping season) and if you stop to ask, most people (including the police on duty) will be willing to help you find one.   A good rule is that the camps with the enormous bouncy castles are rental camps.   If you want to buy your own tent, the tent market is behind the Friday Market in Rai.  They always have tents on display during any season.

Cancer Support Group

PetSpa

I have a feeling I am going to be writing a LOT about these guys.  I heard from a groomer friend that he just went to work for them and the words he used were, "humane" and "professional".  Hmmmm....  So far, so good.  Thank God, I don't have to drive 45 minutes down to the other place if I can find a place closer to home for grooming (and since it is in Shaab - with plenty of decent restaurants around so I don't end up waiting at the Seashells resort).  Bada bing.  I've also heard that the obedience trainer that PetSpa has is from South Africa and has beaucoup de certifications and is gentle with dogs.  Mikey needs to go to school.

I still have been too damn lazy to call Doggy Day Care people.  Mike also needs to have his vaccinations completed before I do.

So much to do around a little farm....

Looking for a Forever Home for my Pet Goat, Paco

There are still 2 more months of camping season (until April 1). I'm looking for a home for Paco with other Czech goats after the season.  Maybe he can start a family.  

Paco is an intact, 5-year old, bi-color (1/2 white, ½ brown) male with a friendly, happy temperament.  He's good with other animals.  He probably wouldn't be good in an apartment (although he's quiet).  He likes room to run and kick his heels up (literally). Czec goats like to climb things.  Paco likes to eat raisins.    He smiles when he's happy (as above) and makes noise when he's upset.  If he likes you, he'll quietly follow you around.  He's such a great goat.

Does anyone know anyone with Czech goats in Kuwait?  I would love for him to be with other goats and remember his goat life. Right now, he thinks he's human.  

SIDEBAR:  Czech goats are not good for eating.  Their meat is very tough. They don’t taste good.  Everyone in Kuwait knows this.  Don’t even think about it.

When bells go off

My mother always told me to listen to my intuition; something that I have learned was very good advice.  If something doesn't feel right or seem right, don't do it.  If it seems dramatic or not, I usually follow my instinct.  If I like someone; I like them.  If I don't like someone; I don't.  There isn't usually a whole lot of gray area.  If someone comes across as sincere and kind, I'll know it.  If shady, secretive or sneaky, I can usually detect that (unless, as many cases have proven - and you can read about it on the blog - people are just too guarded and disguised to be able to tell).  I'm not always right, but I try to go by instinct.

One of the first weekends that we had our camp put up in November, a guy came to visit who I had seen before, but never had the warm-and-fuzzies for.  He was one of those people who just rubbed me the wrong way.  I quickly found out why; he was a creep.  My friends tell me that I'm too quick to judge sometimes.  But hey, I do.

Creeper dude had been sent to help me earlier in the night to go and pick up one of our friends from the main road.  It was after the big rains and we needed a 4 wheel drive to get in and out of the area.  So, we went in Creep's car.  The minute we got away from the camp, he had his hand on my leg, telling me how attractive I am, and why don't I have a boyfriend, etc.  I totally brushed him off.  We went back to the camp and everything was ok.  Our friends stayed for a few hours and left.

I'm the only single girl in our camp.  My tent is the one (that shouldn't be, but is) on the outskirts of the camp, closest to the parking opening.  My tent should really be inside somewhere, nestled between the guys' tents, so it would be more secure.  But it isn't.  It has only bothered me on this one occasion; and that was one night when I went to sleep before everyone else and they moved on into the big tent (where the music was so loud that you couldn't hear a thing outside).

Creeper dude must have seen me go to my tent.  Everybody knows that I sleep earlier than everyone.  Now, in Arab culture, when you approach someone'st tent, you approach from the front and announce yourself. Most of my camp buddies cough or clear their throats (or shout rude names for sport).  I was alone in my tent, changing my clothes when I heard someone call my name from the side of the tent.  I didn't know that the tent's side door wasn't tied down.  Half Creep's body was inside my tent and he was watching me undress!  I had a fit.  I called my friend, MO (basically the Ring Master for our entire little circus) who immediately came over and reassured me that they had kicked Creep out of the camp and he would never be returning. (MO's girlfriend later told me that Creep had walked into her/MO's tent unannounced earlier the same night when she was half-dressed as well!)  MO said he and our guy friends would "have words" with Creep (I've seen their "words" before - up to hospitalization.)  They offered to switch my tent with one of the other guys.  They tied down and locked all the openings on my tent.  It was all good.

I've known MO for 10 years.  He's like a brother to me.  I adore him.  I've never had a fight with him about anything. Not small.  Not large.  He is someone who automatically understands my moods and my concerns, and acts on them without being asked.  When I travel, he hands me money (not that I need it or I want to accept it, but because it makes him feel better).  When I'm sick, he brings me, or orders me food or sends friends to check on me.  He takes me to the doctor.  He checks on me if he hasn't heard from me.  He gets my car fixed.  His family is my family.  His girlfriend is a dear friend.   He has a huge (and I do mean huge) circle of friends who have become my friends and invited me to their homes and into their families.  There is love and mutual admiration.

Back to my story....

So now, almost 3 months later, I went to the camp as usual.  All the friends were happy and chatting.  I went to my tent for something and one of the guys called and said that Creep was on his way over to the camp!!! They said they missed him and wanted to talk to him.  I had a FIT.  I don't like the caller anyways, so I hung up on him.

I went to the big tent to find MO,  who got angry at ME.  He thought I was overreacting and that I should talk to him later about it.

 I now listen to alarms in my head.  Respect is a big deal to me ("overreacting" or not).  Surprisingly (to even me), it took me less than 15 minutes to load all my stuff (sans furniture, of course) and dog and dog-belongings into my car and leave.   I don't take personal safety for granted (and you can refer to "Not Without My Camaro" for a case study).  If there was to be a creep in the camp and no one was going to be there for me, I was out of there.  No one tried to stop me.  No one came to help me.  The metaphor of "quietly packing up the tent and moving under darkness of night" applied to me.

I'm trying to gauge my own reaction:  was it OTT-me being dramatic, or a 4-department alarm?  I question everything and in "girl style," analyze the crap out of a situation until it almost makes no more sense to me.  I do take my safety very seriously.  I think if we, as women, let something go once, a creep will take it as an indication that he can advance.

What I never expected was that the situation with Creep would affect my friendship with MO.  Never in a million years.  This is a guy who has had my back for the past 10 years.  It went without question that he would think of me first.   I value our friendship very much, so I think it was worthy to talk it out.  I called him immediately the next day to talk.  I send SMSs to tell him that I love him and maybe it was just a snap decision and there was something I was missing or didn't understand.  (Take the higher road and just do it.)

So why hasn't he returned any of my calls?  Why didn't he come after me that night? Why didn't he send me messages in the morning?  Why didn't he understand my concern?  Why would he have ever considered inviting the guy back again?  I don't get it.  Creep didn't just do it to me, he did it to MO's girlfriend also.  He's a peeping Tom and who-knows-what-else.

I hate that I'm not going to go back to the camp again. It was my happy place.  What about my baby, Paco? What is going to happen to him?  What about my extended group of friends?  Will I not be included in the group anymore?  Sadness.

But ....  everything in life is a blessing from God.  You might not always know why.  Maybe something bad would have happened on the road on a weekend-to-come.  Maybe I am meant to be at another place and meet other people or do other things.  Maybe I shouldn't depend so heavily on people.  Maybe there is another lesson to be had.

I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens with MO.  I read his tarot the night before this all happened and it said that he is having petty arguments with many of his friends and family now and it is a situation that will continue until he can take a step away from it and re-evaluate things (like to travel and get a different perspective).  I could see by his facial expressions that I was correct.  He sent me an SMS this week saying that he was very tired and moody and that he would be in touch with me soon to talk.  I do value him; he is important to me.  I just wonder if waiting to talk is a good idea for me.  Once hurt, I tend to retreat and it is not a good thing for long-lasting friendships/relationships.  Once broken, the plate is hard to glue back together.  I'm usually on to something new.

I think I'll go visit my old old old old friends this weekend.  Recharge.

DG's Thoughts on Kuwait's Archaic Tenancy Law

Ok, now let me discuss my thoughts on Kuwait's archaic tenancy law:  It sucks.

There is rampant discrimination (because landlords CAN because there are NO LAWS AGAINST IT).

• Single woman (of any nationality/race)?  You're a prostitute.  Forget about the apartment, whore! 
• Single man (of any nationality/race)? You party all night and bring in prostitutes (who don't have their own apartments because no one will rent to them). You will also make it a "den of vice" bringing in gambling and alcoholism and possibly even drugs.  The landlord's daughters are not safe.  You are The Devil.
• Kuwaiti single man or woman:  Forget it.  You're just shit out of luck.  Why don't you live with your family?  Something is wrong with you!  Why doesn't your father want you at home?  What did you do? 
• Kuwaiti families?  No way.  You will trash the apartment and make noise all night, and your kids will run around screaming and marking up all the walls,  and your entire family will leave all your shoes in the hallway (ok, that last part is true, regardless.  I'm still going around hunting for pairs of size 9 Jimmy Choos, but all I'm finding are crappy slippers).  

So, what do you see in ALL the ads?  "Westerners only".  And even if you see "Foreigners Only" it still means "Westerners" because if you are from many other countries of the world (and there are a few more), they'll just turn up their nose at you like you're going to be consistently late on your rent or divide their property into many little cells (with corrugated steel walls) so that you can sublet to your hundred friends and all of y'alls will cook fish 24/7 (I like fish, by the way.)

"There goes the neighborhood..."

Housing discrimination.  In the US it is a crime.  It should be a crime here.

There should be a proper tenancy law to protect both the landlord and the renters PROPERLY.  There should be rent caps and anti-discrimination clauses.  (I've been looking for the Kuwait Tenancy Law online and I haven't been able to find one.  I've got a book called "Everything You Need to Know About Kuwaiti Laws" which contains the law.  I got it at Muthanna Book Store ages ago.)

Anyhooser, people are starting to talk about update of the Kuwait Tenancy Law since rents are skyrocketing (also known as GREED) and everybody here is suffering; even the greedy who have lots of empty apartments (known as the "cut off your nose to spite your face" method of property ownership.  They would rather have it empty for a year and half than to come down off that magical number - like 900kd for a 2 bedroom "ultra deluxe" (by whose standard???) apartment.

So what do you do?  Set up a tent?  No, because the frickin Municipality has some kind of mental telepathy and can tell when anyone is even close to passing wind on or around government land.  It is called, "encroaching".  They have bulldozers (brought in by quiet and stealth black helicopters when no one ever sees/hears them); they appear from nowhere with one extremely mean guy in a distasha who barks non-sensical things and waves papers frantically;  Scares the shit out of you.  It is meant to daze and confuse.  So just forget the tent idea.  It isn't going to work.  Oh, all this paragraph also pertains to planting seedlings and/or flowers or foliage.  Just pop in a petunia anywhere and see what I mean;  black helicopters and bulldozers, my friends.  Yup.  You heard it from me.

Oh no he di' in't!

I get a text message this morning from a casual friend saying that he can't sign on an apartment that he wants because he's Kuwaiti and they only rent to foreigners; and will I sign his lease.

[Ok, I will get into my thoughts on Kuwait's blatantly racist (often against their own people)  housing practices in a moment, but let me start on the topic first of ....]

Oh My God, he did not just send me that on an SMS, did he?  You couldn't just drop by and ask me in person?  But a text message after I haven't seen you in what... weeks?  Please!  Oh yeah, and ya KNEW I was sick and there were no offers of chicken soup or helping ME in any way/shape/form.

First of all, we are casual friends.  Really casual.  We share a singular interest and that's it.  We're not involved in a romantic relationship.  We're not in love.  We don't date.  He doesn't know my friends and I don't know his friends.  I thought, at first, that perhaps we could have all that, but I realized early on after he stated that he is a "single guy and doesn't want to be tied down."  Hey - who's tying you down.  Fly and be free, little butterfly...  I do like him and he likes me and we talk once in a while.

But.... I don't know him well.  I know him CASUALLY.  I don't know his family.  I don't know (fer sure) what he does on the weekends.  I don't know who his friends are or who he might be bringing to my (if I should sign a lease) apartment.  It's not going to happen.

You know, "taking advantage" or "masla7a" (Kuwaiti word for the same) is a strong term and I hate to use it with people I like, but it is exactly that.

People take advantage.  Push to see how far you can get.  Get one over.  It always surprises me when someone actually has the balls to ask for things (whether I know in advance that they are outrageous requests - or whether I later discover are outrageous requests).

I'm a giving person.  It is in my personality and perhaps that is a downfall, but I find satisfaction/gratification to helping others (to a phucking EXTENT).  Don't push me, mofo.

In Apartment Dude's case, I could have shot him down or said mean things (or even signed the lease and then sold all of his stuff and moved), but I handled it very diplomatically and said that perhaps if we were ever in a serious relationship in the future when I had met his family and friends, gone out to meals with him in public, felt comfortable and trusted him, and would actually get to someday SEE the apartment I was signing on, then I would reconsider.

And now, let's get to those people who want me to carry back heavy shit on the plane.  When I ask, "Would you like anything from the States?" it usually to be polite (like asking "How are you?" You really don't want a real answer, it is more of a courtesy question)  - or - if I can get something that is small and you can't find in Kuwait.  I'm not talking about carrying back car parts, computers, commercial items in volume for your business (when you can find it down the street in KUWAIT for slightly more money).  Sometimes I don't even offer and I get the questions.  No, I can't bring back a frickin transmission for your 19-some-shit Chevy shitbox.  No, I don't want to bring back 300 bottles of Essie nail polish (that was a cheap move by the way) when it is at Jashamal for a little more and you know it (I do now!).  No, I'm not going to carry back a laptop, or a 4lb bottle of car spray-wax or 20 books.  Uh NO - I'm not going to front you $1500 for the UGLIEST Burberry bag I've ever seen in my life and then bring it back for you.

Here goes, freeloaders:  ARAMEX SHOP and SHIP.  SULTAN CENTER "JUST ASK" SERVICE.  What is your problem?

Do people even get the airline's baggage policies and how much they charge.  I bring back 2 suitcases of MY STUFF every time I travel.  I fly United:  First bag is free, second bag is $100. I weigh (with a baggage scale) 50lbs each (23kilos) of MY STUFF.  Now, if you're springs for your Cadillac - which will actually fit into a suitcase - weigh an additional 50 kilos, the third bag costs $200 (around 57dinars).  Or, for all those "small items" combined, it would still run me an additional $200 that I end up paying.

No more Ms. Nice Girl.  I'm out.

Busted Again.... and Again

It should come as no shock to me now that people have figured out my true identity.  I've been doing this for so long and there are so many "clues" throughout the posts that it is pretty obvious, but still, ok.... it is still surprising to me when people walk up and say, "Are you Desert Girl?" and strike up a nice (always nice!) conversation.

Last week, I was getting Peealot his vaccinations and a lovely woman and her husband walked up and asked.  See, this is why I blog.  I love the compliments and people who take the time to thank me for little things.  Gratitude is a powerful thing, I always say, and it works both ways.  A few words mean so much and it made my day/week.  Love it!  Thank you, A!  You are too sweet and I hope that you and your family are enjoying your adventure here.

I also went to see The Messila Gang (Desert Guy's cousins/friends) this weekend and my friend, Posh (that's your new name, girl) and her man (I'm just going to go ahead and do something silly and call him "Becks" as his name begins with a B and that's who Posh is with, right?), Becks, were giving me funny looks.  Now, I'm no stranger to funny looks by any means.  I get them all the time.  But these two looked downright mischievious.  Tee hee.  Posh is a reader.  Who knew?   She's not just pretty and elegant, but girlfriend is intelligent enough to have some of my characters figured out (like Puppy Dude).  We had a lot of laughs that night.    (Not too much chance - for many reasons -  that Puppy Dude will read blogs.  Whew!)

Peealot is sick at the moment.  He eats everything/anything without even chewing; just gulps and it's gone.  IVH's x-ray machine was on the fritz this weekend, so we couldn't see 'zactly what is down in there, but I'm guessing it is either coinage or some form of plastic.  Either way, he's sick and it is like having a sick child.  I hate it.  Desert Dawg continues to be a sincere biotch to him.  At first, I thought that Mikey was being too rough with her (she's so much smaller and frailer than he is), but then after talking to my sister who went though a similar situation with her old bitch and young puppy; that perhaps it wasn't the rough boy's fault.  I paid more attention and sure enough, that little bitch, DD, is snapping at him even if he's across the room and looks at her!  WTF.  She's just downright ornery.  She bites him and growls and barks at him.  Eventually (so says my sister) she will get used to it, but for now, she's just being evil.  I'm trying to give them both equal attention.

I had a forced-quiet weekend.  Not that I wanted it that way.  With 3 days off, I thought I could finally get down to the camp and spend some time with "nature" (that's what I call Jose Cuervo combined with my friends).  I've been so sick since I got back her on the 2nd that I just couldn't do it.  Forget about spending the night in the tent; no way.  And what's with this weather???  I haven't seen so much rain in the winter in like... ever.  Every weekend, my tent smells like cat pee from the damp.  It's just nas-teh.   Anyhooo, not that I would spend the night (or even a lot of time in the cold) because I've had bronchitis.  I get tired doing even mundane tasks (like mopping up puppy pee - more on that in a moment).  I finally gave in and went back to my doctor (for the 3rd time in as many weeks) and got a shot in the ass (literally) of B12 so I would have more energy.  Then, I ate all the vitamins in my medicine cabinet.  I actually feel a LOT better this morning.

Puppy pee (because I know you've been waiting for this, right?):  So, while at IVH, I asked their trainer about the persistent pee problem (PPP or P3 to be accurate).  P3 is like this:  Dude makes a little puddle and then, like he can't turn off the faucet, walks around creating a lovely stream of pee drops throughout my house and in the yard.  NO!  He hasn't figured out the Art of Housetraining yet.  So, I asked the trainer.  He said that it is normal (I thought it was a boy-thing that I didn't know about and apparently it is), and that at age  6 to 8 months, he'll stop.  WHAT????!  6 to 8 months???  We'll all drown!  it will be like going down on the Titanic.  THAT MUCH pee!  As it is, I follow him around with a mop and a bucket.  I buy more lavendar-scented cleaner than the stores here can stock (but it smells sooooo pretty and not at all like pee...).  How am I going to endure this for 3 to 5 more months?  I'll surely perish!  Yikes.  The dogs I've had have always learned in under a month.  This guy just does whatever the F he feels like.  I'm like, "MIKEEEEEY!!! You're not finished!  Complete the pee!"  Why the trail?  RRRR. 

So this weekend, I went to Banta where they sell washable, inexpensive carpets. I can throw the entire thing in my washing machine whenever I want.  The carpet cleaners I've found here are expensive (20kd per carpet - even the small ones - eeek). I'm lovin' Banta.  Ikea used to have cotton carpets, but it seems that they don't make them anymore.

(Why do people read my mundane ranting?  I don't get it.  Are you still with me?  Really?)

Ok, so while I was at the camp this weekend (while the weather was sunny and dry for like 2.5 nanoseconds), I taped Paco (my goat) and Mikey playing.  They have a bromance.  They're in puppy/goat love.   Paco sees Mikey from a distance and runs right over to him and starts his dance.  I love it.  They're so cute.  (Now THIS here is entertainment, y'alls.)  I would keep Paco in my house if I could get away with it.  He's dog-sized anyways and pees very neatly.  Baaaaaaaaa

(It's not poor sound quality you're hearing - it is our bigass generator in the background and of course the lovely prayer call that reminds us all to pray at the crack of dawn (when we're going to sleep); courtesy of the very considerate neighbors in the camp across the road.  Thank you so much.)

People who talk about their kids all the time nauseate me

(Faked puking noises)

Ok so I get it. I really do.  Your child if fascinating and you want to share your experiences(especially with friends).  But... THEY DON'T GIVE A CRAP.  They don't.  I'll give it a limit of maybe 5 stories (or stories shared over several visits/lunches/dinners intended to be catching up sessions with your friends.)  That's it.  After that, eyes glaze over and you can't get a glass of wine in this country so there is NO ESCAPE.  (I'm ranting, right?)

But this is MY blog and you can stop reading.  You don't have to listen to me go on and you're not paying for my lunch, so shut up.

Let's talk about my baby, Mike Peealot!

So, last night was the first time he had experienced (lots of) grass (like the kind that you find in gardens and golf courses).  I love re-visiting the same old common things that we take for granted every day through the eyes of either a newcomer or a first-time experience of another (in this case) creature.  He ran a straight line with his head down and his mouth open as if he was scooping up water.  I think he was taking in all the new smells and feel of the cold grass.  He stopped every once in a while to roll around in it and was thoroughly happy.  I'm trying to train him (OMG he is STRONG at 3 months!) so I am trying to take him out when there are only a few people around so he won't be distracted  (also so he doesn't knock down any little old ladies with his sheer force). So far, he is extremely focused (which is great since he is still so young) and doesn't care about kids, other animals (even including cats). I think perhaps socializing him with Desert Dawg has helped in that regard.  She is not only semi-human, but also catlike and a little old lady.

I took him home from the park (yes, we have those in Kuwait) and thought (mistakenly) that he would be tired.  Ha!  He slept for a while and I woke at 1:00 am to the sounds of what I thought were distant gunshots.  Pop!  Pop!  Pop pop!  I went out (had to put on my flip-flops first to avoid puppy pee puddles) in the living room (armed with my AK - ha ha, just kidding - or not.  Don't come to my house late a night without calling first.) and discovered that Mikey had taken a sheet of large bubble wrap out of the trash.  WHO can resist bubble wrap??  I axe ya.  He had the sheet between his humungous front paws and was popping the bubbles one at a time like a little kid.

I love this little guy.  He's pure joy and thinks the world is his toy.

Speaking of toys - I got him the COOLEST dog toy EVER (at BBB).  It is called, "The Doggy Bag."  It is harder than Hell to get batteries into, but once you're in, it will keep your dog busy for hours.  I had to take it away from MP because he was barking so loud at it. It is a ball in a burlap bag that it motion-activated. It bounces, barks, makes panting noises.  Hilarious.  I couldn't install the batteries, so I took it to our Director of IT (why bother a tech when you can irritate a Director?) and asked him to do it for me ('You have all the right tools.' yes, he does.)  He asked me what it was.   I told him. 'Can you help me fix my ball?'  He said it added a new definition of "scared the crap out of me." He didn't think that he had installed the batteries right because it wasn't doing anything and then all of a sudden it stared shaking around and barking at him (in his office!)  ha.  I love that.  If I knew it would get that reaction, I swear I would have done it to him intentionally just for giggles.


Hey, don't judge me!
Keep your inner child alive!

Another cool thing I found in the States was a LED-lit dog leash (at a whopping cost of $5).  They are coming up with some COOL items.  I just grabbed one (I should have bought a bunch) because it is PINK.  Yes, Mike does look kind of weird walking around with a hot pink leash - not very masculine - but I don't care.  It's AWWWWESOME.

They never had these things when I was a kid. Well, even when Desert Dawg was a puppy.  I'm having so much fun with this.

Rough Re-Entry

I had a great time in the States.  Everything was perfect; the family, the weather, the Christmas decorations... the total package.  I caught up with some old friends and had a lot of giggles. I spent a lot of time with my mommy.   I finally opened the bottle of champagne that my dad gave me on my 18th birthday.  I had been saving it for a time in my life when I was really happy.  Mashallah, I am happy.  Although champagne THAT old (no, I'm not giving my age away) tastes like pee (just guessing).  It was not a good taste.  Props to my dad, however. Thank you, Daddy.

(I didn't drink tequila until I got back to Kuwait, by the way.  I know - totally unusual, but I was into Irish Coffees and French Martinis.  What can I say?  I'm international.)

So on the horrendously overbooked United Airlines flight on the return to Kuwait (packin' 'em in 4 times a week rather than on a previously-daily schedule), I sat next to Hack-and-Spew Man.  He hurled up loogies at an alarming rate, constantly, for the 12.5 hour flight;  Making MY re-entry into Kuwait not a pleasant one. H&S Man infuckted me.  I'm a lady, however, and never hock loogies.  It's rude and not done in polite society, n'est pas?  I got away with a very bad 3-day-long headache, fever,  runny nose (red and cracking from tissue abuse), and then, stomach problems.  Oh joy.

I was okay for about 5 hours when I arrived to Kuwait; including the ride home with a gorgeous man sent by my friend who had an emergency and couldn't pick me up.  (Send MORE!)  I admit, I was miffed when I heard he wasn't coming.  I had thought that for once, I would be greeted by a group of my friends and that one of them might even have a flower. That is my dream; on this side or in the States.  Just one flower or a balloon when I get there.  Why not?  But alas, tall gorgeous CID man driving a Merc G series (black, bien sur) had to do. Too bad he's married.  Dayum.

Let me back up a little:  I could have started getting sick the day I received an SMS from a friend announcing the reduced speed limits in Kuwait.  Twas the night after Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was spared as I shouted, "WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUCK!"  (My mother thought someone had died.)  Yes, they have reversed the decision now (thank you!), but not before I had a mild cardiac arrest and started looking at 10 year old Lancers for sale.  Why should I drive a Camaro if I can only go 100kph on the highway?  That's like a rural road in the US - NOT why I came to Kuwait.  Yeah yeah, it would save lives, blah blah blah... but many States in the US are even raising the speed limits (again, in rural areas).  At Kuwait gas prices, let dem horsies RUN!

My friend, E, kept my baby while I was out of town (the car).  I was a little concerned about it until I got back to discover how much work he had done on it (maintenance stuff and a little damage from a ding I got on Bidaa Roundabout).  So nice.  I've been helping him with a little banking issue in the States that I finally managed to get finalized.  I don't know if we're even, but I got him his $20K so perhaps.  That should cover it, right?

I saw the Kuwaiti family when I returned, but I was so sick that most of it was a blur.  They know I love fish and made it special for me, but when your stomach is doing flip-flops, fish is the last thing you want to see.  It was great regardless.  I love that family so much.

Clean/Dirty was there.  Something is happening with him.  I knew he would eventually feel guilty and like everything you do, it comes back around. His 2 brothers didn't give him "permission" to talk to me; they still sit on both sides of me and are still very protective (which I find cute and ironic at the same time).   He wanted me to take his car (mine's a manual gear) because I didn't feel good and he thought it would be easier for me to drive.  I don't know what that was all about, but he insisted on it.  I insisted on driving my car.  What does he want?  Pshhhh (she said with a head-toss to the side).

My friend, CG, stayed with my dogs while I was gone.  That woman is a saint.  Desert Dawg is no problem, but the new one is Hell on paws.  He's like a teen-aged boy.  He's pushing 3 months old now (his 2nd ear just went up) and everything is a toy; including water dishes which he likes to slap his paw in and eventually knock over.  His Indian name is Pee-a-lot.  I swear, if I turn around for 2 seconds, there is a new puddle.  (Thank you SO much, CG!!!)   He knows he's being naughty; he gets the guilty look.  He is fine in the desert when he's away from DD (really obedient and submissive), so I think it might be a jealousy thing.  We are going through the transition phase in our little family; everybody is getting to know each other.  DD isn't enjoying it; although when she's not getting negative attention from Sir Pee-a-Lot, she'll run over to him until he bops her again with his gigantic paw; like a club.  He's almost got a complete understanding of "speak" and "don't speak" on command.  He's really a smart guy, Mashallah.  He's from very good stock.  His parents are valued at around 6,000KD a piece (champion line).  I got lucky with the little shyt (Mashallah).

DD is pushing her 17th year now.  I had planned to get a GS after she went.   As my friend, Hmood said, "Maybe he came to you as a blessing the way he did."  He just kind of fell into my care when I didn't expect it.  My sister has told me something similar before; to prepare myself and that it might be better to get a puppy before it happens.  Personally, after 17 years with any living creature, I don't think there is any way to prepare.  It is going to be awful.  I'm getting more emotional now that I'm almost in my 30's (ha ha, good one, DG!).

Anyways, dog-story-short, I've got a cranky bitch and a puppy that pees constantly (and not in a neat little puddle, but more of a puddle and stream-trail) and dealing with all that crap (and I mean that quite literally) just is no good when you have the flu and are tired and jet-laggy-assed and you have a headache and no one is calling you to bring you frickin soup (yeah, I remember, girl - thanks for the memories) or sending PINK FRICKIN ROSES, damn it. OOOOOOOH SAAAAA, Desert Disaster.  It otay.

It is 2014 and you are blessed.  You is smart.  You is kind.  You is important. (You guys too!)

2013 in Review

2013 has been an interesting year for me.  I don't know what it was about this year, but I lost a lot of friends.  I also gained new ones and re-discovered a few old ones.

I lost several friends to illness; like my dear friend, Jaime, who passed away of liver problems.  She went to the US with her family from Vietnam in 1975 as a baby.  She was one of my crazy friends; most of her friends were Vietnamese gangsters and that made for some "interesting" situations.  I felt (feel) guilty because I didn't call her and hadn't seen her in many years.

Other friends, like The Romanian, I lost to "friendship complications" (and I'll leave it at that).  She was a long-term BFF  of 16 years, so it was very traumatic for me.

Then, there was the love loss of Mr. Clean/Dirty.  I had a really hard time recovering from him and I've had to stop waiting for the apology that will never come.  (He's told his family how bad he feels, but he's never said it to me directly.)

Business was a mixed batch this year too.  Although we won a little business, we lost a lot.  I felt a lot of responsibility towards quite a few of our employees on a contract we had held for many years. I obsessed over minute details of the re-bid proposal, which we were destined to lose to a cheaper bidder.  When we did and people lost their jobs, it hit me hard and I don't think I realized how much stress I'd been under until I got here to the States and took several steps back.  People have been gracious and kind about it even through their hardships, "Don't worry.  Everything is in God's hands..."  I tried my best, honestly.

On the positive side, I have learned who true friends are who were in the background for years and I never worked on being closer with.  Now that I have, I regret not knowing sooner how fiercely loyal they are and how they were there all the time for me.  All I had to do was to reach out - and there they were.

I've gained a family this year.  While things didn't work out with Clean, I gained his family.  I'm considered one of them and his dad has taken me under his wing.  He is my surrogate dad and I'm so happy about it that it is difficult to describe in words.  They've become a support system that I didn't know how badly I was missing.

I've also gained a new family member, Mike.  Mike is a German Shepard puppy that one of my friends bought to breed.  Dude was keeping 1-month-old Mike in a cage, outside, with no blanket or warmth when I volunteered to take him home and train him.  That was over a month ago.  Mikey has settled in permanent now.  Desert Dawg isn't too happy with him, but it might do her good to have a little competition in the house as she has been getting cranky and mean lately.  Several of my friends have remarked that Mike may have come along at the right time since DD is now pushing her 17th year and may not have longer to go.  I don't want to think about that.  I've always wanted a German Shepard and I was planning to get one when the time was right.  This little guy just kind of fell into my lap.  He's smart and he'll make a great companion in my old age.

I would like to say thank you to all you readers (there are like 2 now!) who have taken the time to write nice things to me this past year.  Little kindnesses go a long way and you may not know the value of a few small words, but they have meant a tremendous amount to me.  I do not take the kindness of strangers lightly; you never know when God is sending you angels - which is exactly how I feel about all of you.  Kind words are invaluable and there is real power in gratitude, so thank you all so much for your continued virtual friendships; sometimes throughout the years.

And on that note:  If there is anything I can do to help you (or information I can provide that might help you here on the blog) for 2014, please let me know.  I will do my best to try to assist.

May you all have a happy, healthy, prosperous, and love-filled 2014.  God bless you all and keep you safe.

Almost Cwimmas

I'm in Virginia with the fam.  There is still snow on the ground from last week, but today they said it will get up to 60 degrees, so that will all go.  It is so nice to be here, but of course I miss all my peeps in Kuwait.  Everything is all Christmassy and pretty here.  Mashallah, I'm happy.

I'll write more later when I'm not cutting into my shopping time.

Happy Birthday, Reyadh-O

I would like to say a special  happy birthday to my friend, Reyadh, at Al Boom Dive Center.

I've known Reyadh since I was 18 years old when he was just starting his career as a diver.  That was a while ago... (I am not going to date either one of us by revealing HOW long ago, but it has been a  little while).

We've been through a lot of ups and downs and we are still life-long friends.  He taught me much of what I know about Kuwait through kindness and generosity; as did his family.  I sincerely regret never having had the opportunity to meet his mother in person (God rest her soul), but she is someone who has made an impact on my life and I think of her whenever I drive by Daiya.  She was a kind woman who welcomed me into their family.

I am still friends with some of Reyadh and my mutual friends.  I still see them as young 20-somethings as students; hanging out in clubs, driving cool cars, being cool in general.  I was one of the gang.  I cooked for them, helped them with stupid things like problems with neighbors or bank accounts, and invited them to meet my family (hopefully extending a little American hospitality).

I was driving down the Gulf Road, many years later, when a ranking officer in a fire truck leaned out the window and say, "(Desert Girl)!  Is that YOU?"  I see him in the newspapers sometimes these days.  The hair is a little different, but they are just older cool guys now.

Reyadh was dear to my family.   They all expected him to be part of us forever, but we took different paths in life.  I am thankful that he is so happy and he has so many wonderful blessings in his life (hey - including a friend like ME!)  He has (Mashallah) 7 children and a job that he loves working on the sea.  He's extremely popular in diving circles and (again Mashallah) has many friends throughout the world now.

So to you, Schmed:  I will always remember you as that cool 24-year old guy with the sports car and the awesome group of friends.  The apartment in Rockville and Saleh's house guest who broke the toilet trying to squat on it Arabic-style.  Traveling to see Sami and Talal in LA.  Taking the boat to that little island in Hawaii.  Bob's Big Boy.   Daytona beach.  Hanging with my dad in Baltimore.  Fetah's major crush on my sister.   My mom's fierce loyalty to you.  Defending you when your downstairs neighbor said, "You Arabs are cooking in your living room."  You defending me from the Monster.  Salah cooking mowish and Shannon hating it. ... and many more years of endearing memories that I owe to you.

Happy birthday, dear friend. I hope to be wishing you the same well into our '90's!

I WANT IT!

Is it in Kuwait?  Is it?  Is it?

Animal Care: WATER!!!

So this weekend, I was at my camp.  We have a friend who just added a tent (our camp has now become an expansive "compound" with more friends adding more tents all over the place.  More on that later).  Anyhoo, new dude brought 2 dogs with him:  His prized English bulldog and a French bulldog (I could tell causa their accents and one wore a beret).  The English bulldog got to sleep in his tent. I don't know why he didn't let the French bulldog sleep inside too (maybe because he was trying to hump the little guy all night, doggy style; come to think of it, also known as "French-style" so either way, it makes sense.).  Anyways, Dewy (French dog), was tied outside to one of the tent stakes.  Well, it gets hot in the morning and Dewy was out there with his little pug face in a hot pant with NO WATER.

Ok people, but to me (and I'm sure others) -- this is just animal abuse.  You do not leave an animal (ANY animal) in your care without water.  You wouldn't do it to your kids (well shet - maybe a lot of people over here might...).  Anyways, Dewy was so hot that he was trying to dig up the tent stake so he could set himself free.  I got him some water and moved him into the shade.  [I also replaced the chain/wire that was around his neck with a proper collar and leash (I keep them in my car just in case I have to rescue some critter.)]

Then, prized English bulldog came out when the owner woke up. Dude tied him up and again - NO WATER.  WTF. Pugs and bulldogs are NOT good breeds for Kuwait anyways:  It is too hot here and they have breathing problems to begin with because of their short snouts. (United Airlines even refuses to fly them during hotter seasons of the year because of the risk.)  Without water, they can die very quickly.

One time, I was at the Friday Market (I believe it was around 1998 - the last time, I vowed, ever to go there again).  There were a bunch of dogs in small cages, panting heavily and looking near-death.  I asked seller dudes where the water was.  They pointed to empty plastic water bottles littering the ground.  Uh... noooo.... unacceptable.  I went and bought a plastic container, filled it with water, and brought it over to the dogs.  Phucking ridiculous.

When I was 10, my evil step-father came to pull me out of school because I had forgotten to give my dog water that morning.  He totally humiliated me in front of the whole class.  I never did it again.  Maybe what these people need is a good, healthy dose of humiliation.

Always, always, always have fresh water available for your pets and livestock.  It is just common sense.  How would you feel?

Kuwait bride jumps from moving car after divorce threat

Seriously, is the dog worth it???

 (No insult intended towards dogs.)

Divorce rates in Kuwait have reached alarming levels

Gulf News

By Habib Toumi, Bureau Chief

Published: 13:04 November 27, 2013

Manama: The spectre of divorce has led a two-week bride in Kuwait to throw herself out of a moving car. The newlyweds were out on a drive alongside the esplanade in the capital Kuwait City when they had an argument.

When the husband threatened to divorce his wife, she opened the door of the moving car and threw herself out, local daily Al Rai reported on Wednesday. Fortunately, she was not hurt and was able to run away from the vehicle, leaving the husband perplexed. Unable to follow her, he headed to the police station in the posh area of Salmiya (Really??  Has the author ever been to Salmiya??) and informed the officers about the incident.

Contacted by the police, the wife said that she could not control herself when he raised the possibility of divorce and that she threw herself out of the car as she panicked.

She added that she deeply loved him and that she could not bear the thought of being without him. Comments on the daily’s site expressed mainly dismay over the events.

 “Today’s young people have become totally irresponsible,” a user writing under the moniker “Patriot” posted. “In the past, couples spent up to 30 years together without either spouse uttering the divorce word. Now, two weeks into their marriage, the man mentions divorce and the woman throws herself out of a moving car.”

Another user said that “marriage is not a game to be taken lightly” and “people should truly appreciate its significance.”

Divorce figures in Kuwait have reached alarming levels despite state efforts to curb the phenomenon by promoting awareness campaigns and introducing pre-wedding counselling sessions to guide and advise future couples.

Official statistics indicate that the highest divorce figures were among couples who held intermediate school certificates, followed by couples with high school diplomas.

Couples with university qualifications had the lowest rate of divorce in the country.

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The Desert Girl School of Pre-Marriage Counseling

Rule #1:   Bitch please, put a lot of money in the termination of marriage clause.  Low mahar/high out-clause.  "Don't get mad, get everything."  Make sure you write enough in there, so you can take yourself to a nice spa somewhere - maybe even buy a home in a vacation spot.   Write in that if he wants to divorce you, you want jewelry and maybe a sports car (wouldn't THAT be a thang:  He wants to divorce you, but has to buy you a 5K rock and a hot car first!)  Write in all the things that make YOU happy, girlfriend!  Maybe a little some-in, some-in for your moms too.   Then, once you're married, if he ever says the D word -  remind him of this:  "Yala, divorce me and pay up or shut up!"

Throw yourself from a moving car?  Why????