Monday, October 21, 2013

Kuwait Tourism (an Oxymoron Case Study)

(Image by deviantart.com)


The Kuwait Times is running a story this morning entitled, " Eid sees loads of cash spent, big chunk of it abroad – Call to boost local tourism."  To wit I say, 'No shyt, Sherlock.'  It is an interesting article and I'm not degrading the writing (by Nawara Fattahova) by any means (well written, good factual content).  I'm just tiring of the subject after so many years of hearing about it with no movement from the Government.  It seems that regardless of how many people make the point:  it is all falling on deaf ears.

The article states:   Estimates show that more than 250,000 passengers left Kuwait during the Eid holidays. According to General Directorate of Civil Aviation, more than 121,000 passengers left Kuwait through Kuwait International Airport within the first three days, while about 70,000 travelled through land borders. Hajaj Bukhadour, an economic analyst, believes Kuwait lost another KD 1 billion which the potential tourists may have spent in Kuwait if it was a touristic country. “All countries pay attention to tourism as it is an important economic source for the country. Unfortunately, Kuwait is not one of these countries and tourism here is appalling. Kuwaitis and expats who have accounts in Kuwaiti banks spent around KD 1 billion during this short holiday inside and outside Kuwait, so if there were tourists visiting Kuwait, they would spent a similar amount here,” he told Kuwait Times. “If local tourism was attractive this would be an additional income of Kuwait. Unfortunately the awareness of the importance of tourism is very low in Kuwait between the people as well as the government and parliament. To have tourism in the country requires having laws for visa and residency and touristic projects to attract tourists and encourage local tourism,” ...

There was another interesting article in the Kuwait Times, quoting Nabila Al-Anjari on how "Kuwait placed last in GCC tourism, 101 worldwide: Al-Anjeri."  Ms. Al-Anjeri was former Assistant Undersecretary for Tourism Affairs at the Kuwait Ministry of Information.  I recall that she worked very hard to promote the 20-year tourism plan for Kuwait (which resulted in the building of many of the hotels you now see in Kuwait – with a current occupancy rate at about 30%)  and endeavored to work towards promoting Kuwait.  I also recall hearing that she was met with bureaucracy and brick walls.  That is a pity.  Ms. Anjeri provides valid points in this article and again – an interesting read.

When I first came to Kuwait in 1996, Kuwait’s tourism tag line was, “Kuwait:  It’s Different.” (With an illustration of Kuwait Towers).  I loved that!  It is exactly what I think of Kuwait.  It IS different; no other country has the flavor that Kuwait has, nor the ability to remark on its own quirkiness.  What is the slogan now?  Does anybody know?  “Kuwait:  Don’t Come Here.”  Or maybe, “If you’re gay, don’t even think about it.”  Or perhapsee, “Kuwait:  If you want a drink, go to Bahrain or Dubai.” or "Come to Kuwait:  We'll F up your national anthem too"   (I could continue…)

Ok, even back then in 1996, the official Kuwait tourism board, “Kuwait Touristic Enterprises Company” (KTEC) was well-maintained.  We went to Entertainment City in Doha.  It was fun.  Most of the country-run facilities were clean and well cared for.  Who goes to these places now?  It is a national joke.  The stats speak for themselves – people want to leave.  Those who can’t afford to leave stay here and make barbecues on the Gulf Road (hey, wasn’t that a law they passed a while back – you could be fined 1,000KD for making a fire in a public place?  Enforcement?)  If you were here during this Eid, you couldn’t find a parking space anywhere along the 25km Gulf Road.  That is where everyone went.  The majority of Kuwaitis and expats aren’t going to go near any of the KTEC’s properties.  When was the last time you went to Kuwait Towers, for example?

In my personal experience, I found that the KTEC properties are not English-speaking expat friendly.  If I go to one of those properties, I want to feel welcomed.  Am I alone in this?  There are what – 2.5 million expats in Kuwait?  A whole lot of us can’t read signs in Arabic.  And if I go someplace that I’m being stared at blankly by an Egyptian security guard, I’m going to turn around and leave.    Not to bash the KTEC too bad (but I will), even their website is a turn-off (if you can read and understand the link – in English – you are a better person than I). It’s a shame because Kuwait has SO MUCH potential.  There is just no marketing!  Have you ever seen a KTEC facility marketed on Instagram or Facebook, for example?

What happened to Hala February (in competition with Dubai’s Shopping Month)?  It was a good idea.  It fizzled out much like everything else.  Why not have the Proud 2 Be Kuwaiti exhibition at the same time as Hala February and work in conjunction with each other to pull off something great.  P2BK – those guys are promoting Kuwait at a grass-roots level and should be looked at as a case study in how to do it properly.  Why doesn’t Kuwait have a cultural festival?  Oh wait, I think there have been a few, but all the “advanced” advertising was done about a week prior – and in ARABIC.  Exats want to experience the country where they live.  Why aren’t they being given that opportunity in a common language?  

The Local Economy

Kuwait is going to have to wake up to some cold, hard facts (wake up and smell the chai 7alib). The proposed Kuwaiti 20-Year Tourism Plan kinda died in 2003;  around the same time the US Forces moved into Iraq and planted themselves - and about 20,000 local-economy-boosting Americans and their families (I write that figure only because I know the stat for that particular year.  This number does not include Westerners of other nationalities or TCN laborers brought in).  All of a sudden, a multitude of new services were required:  accommodations, transport (vehicles, trucks, etc.), logistics services, sponsorship services.  Contractors brought their families, so schools and other related child services flourished.  All this drove the economy.  

The ramp-up was staggering.  Local companies made millions (and if you want to write to me for specifics instead of commenting that "blab blah blah that wasn't the case" - I will tell you who and how).  A record number of new apartment complexes were built.  On average, a 2 bedroom apartment in Salmiya (for example) went from 200KD/mo to 450KD/mo (and more) almost immediately.  Trucking companies were doing great as convoys were going in and out of Iraq constantly.  At the height, you could lease a truck head for 1700KD/mo.  People couldn't bring enough trucks into the country to meet the demand.  There weren't enough drivers; all had to be recruited (and hey - in some cases, even trained). Leasing companies were renting out 4x4's as fast as they could get them to roll off the ships. Sponsorship?  The main sponsorship company went from a decrepit office in a very old building into a high-rise tower that they purchased.  They diversified to suit the needs of almost every logistics requirement a contractor might require.  Need full coverage insurance to go with all that?  Sure.  Medical?  Sure.  How are all these people getting in and out of Kuwait?  United Airlines put on daily flights - and they were always full (they recently cut back to 4 flights per week).

Wakey-Wakey

There are no more US troops in Iraq.  There is no more need to support them through a hub in Kuwait. CSA lost their Army support contract in 2010.  The contract went to the lowest-cost, technically qualified bidder:  ITT (emphasis on "lowest-cost").   It's no secret that as the military has reduced their numbers in Kuwait, ITT has had to cut back also.  Gone are the days of the over-the-top accommodation, individual lease cars (they are often shared now), and other benefits.

Kuwaiti real estate companies practice the “cut off your nose to spite your face” methodology of business.  They continue to charge the same rates for apartments around Kuwait, hoping to draw Western renters.  (I say, ‘HA! Where are they going to come from?’  There hasn’t exactly been a huge re-introduction of Westerners at the same scale:  educational institutions top the industry, perhaps seconded by Al-Shaya, as probably the two largest employers of Westerners in the country.  Still, nowhere near the number of Westerners previously in Kuwait prior to say 2011.)  Regardless, real estate companies in Kuwait would rather have their properties sit empty for months, hoping to rent at a higher rate, than to reduce the rent and lease today:  A philosophy that is stupid and short-sighted.

I also get a kick out of the number of people with “logistics” and “defense contracting” companies in Kuwait that are now scrambling to diversify their businesses.  “Can you help us get a military contract…”  NO!  There ARE NO contracts.  It’s all gone.  Forget it.  Go buy a sheesha cafĂ© or a mini-anything-bakery; You’re SOL.

Less talk, more action

Kuwait needs to revisit it’s tourism plans in order to boost the local economy.  It’s gotta happen.

So now we have all these beautiful hotel properties around Kuwait (just waiting for all those Saudi families to come visit – because that is the main tourism draw right now).  They’re marketing only regionally.  If there is a special offer; expat couple beware.  You need to have a copy of your marriage certificate with you or you may be turned away.  This is not something that is advertised and if even one couple was turned away, they can just click over to somewhere like Trip Advisor, make their comments, and BAM – the hotel has lost potential business.  Further, many hotels will not welcome single female guests.  Isn’t that nice?  It doesn’t matter if you’re a lawyer or doctor or professional of any kind; the connotation is immediately that you are there for prostitution (chicks love this).  They can turn you away.  I had a nice conversation with a representative of the Kuwait Hotel Owners Association regarding this issue.  The KHOA is the Kuwaiti conglomerate that dictates hotel rates in the country – giving very little margin for variance on pricing to any hotel in Kuwait.

In my DG opinion, Kuwait should promote more private entertainment projects like Dubai has.  But alas, that goes back to Ms. Al-Anjeri’s article citing necessary infrastructure requirements for cultivating a tourism industry.  And (for those of you who don’t drink - you can’t speak from personal experience, but I can) people who understand the importance of a quality glass of wine with dinner at a 5 star hotel aren’t going to come here unless you ease the rules.  It isn’t going to happen.  I also believe that until Kuwait hires serious public relations communications experts (go get Hill & Knowlton, for Gods sake!  Look what they did for Kuwait in 1990!!!), they are going to have a bad reputation throughout the globe (case in point:  Homosexuality testing in the airport = negative communication impact; like it or not.)  You must have a common communication and present that in a positive manner.  If there are any negative impact statements, again, a common (damage control) communication must be provided.

Promote Kuwait!  Promote the culture, the diversity, the desert, the sea. This is a fascinating country with so much to see – but nobody knows what’s here!   Offer incentives to small companies to join into a group so that resources are shared (for example, the small tourism companies, the dive/boating companies).  Offer assistance to those wanting to start tourism-related businesses.  Create real marketing documents, websites, etc.  Hire people who are experienced in tourism (wow – now that thar is a thought).  Outsource English copy writing to English speakers (and even then, have it edited again by an independent source so that you don’t look like an idiot if it’s wrong).  Think “welcoming” and “friendly”.  Train first-line employees at the airport to be welcoming and friendly.


Sigh…. Again, this is all going to fall on deaf ears.



Tuesday, October 08, 2013

Gaydar A La Kuwait

Queer Eye for the (not-so) Straight Guy

Kuwait can't think of enough ways to embarrass itself around the Globe.  The creative thinkers have been toiling away in committees, thinking of new ways to draw attention to the country.. and then... BAM... there's this!

This story is ALL OVER the internet this morning - just because it is good, clean FUN.


Yessss!  The international media has picked it up.  Another big win for Kuwait.  Way to go!

The Atlantic Wire LINK HERE.

Story:  Yousuf Mindkar, the director of public health in Kuwait announced that the country has stumbled upon the technology to "detect" gays and prevent them from coming across its borders. Mindkar's master plan will be debated on November 11 when the Gulf Cooperation Countries committee convene. What he, and presumably Kuwait, wants is to make sure that the expatriates going to Kuwait are healthy, which seems to mean that they are also not gay. 

"Health centres conduct the routine medical check to assess the health of the expatriates when they come into the GCC countries. However, we will take stricter measures that will help us detect gays who will be then barred from entering Kuwait or any of the GCC member states," Mindkar said in a local report picked up by Gulf News. (In fairness to Kuwait, other countries have had similarly myopic and anti-gay immigration laws. In 2009, the U.S. ended its ban on foreigners with HIV from immigrating or traveling here.)

Mindkar's anti-gay enthusiasm has piqued our interest and conjured images of metal detector-like devices with a disembodied RuPaul voice saying, "Shante you are not gay. You stay." or "You are gay, sashay away (from Kuwait)" after someone steps through.

Kidding aside, how is this even going to work? Is it purely visual (this is very confusing in certain cases)? Doesn't Kuwait know that plenty of LGBT people have spent years living in closets and pretending to be people they're not? Is there a lie detector test? And we wouldn't want to be the ones to break it to Mindkar that gay people come from the loins of straight people, meaning any attempt to keep your country gay-free is all but impossible. 


Further: Kuwait isn't even a gay hotspot. Neither is the Middle East, where gay is banned because of conservative Islam — Dubai, considered one of the more progressive places there, is still pretty intolerant of homosexuality. Berlin and San Francisco these places are not, and people going to Kuwait or Dubai aren't doing so because it's some wonderful Shangri-La for gay people (like Tel-Aviv) or some open gay sex paradise (like Pakistan). And it all makes you wonder if Mindkar is just banning people who, by in large, don't even have any interest in going. 

-  - - End

This is only one story.  Everybody is (so to speak) jumping on it today.

Desert Girl thoughts:

Methinks thou does protest too much.
Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
Just because you are the pitcher and not the catcher does not mean that you are not HOMOsexual or bi.
If you drop your wallet in Kuwait, kick it to Saudi Arabia....
'Do you know that guy?'  "What guy?"  'The guy who F-ed you behind the mahawil.'


(Somebody stop me....)



Sunday, October 06, 2013

Is she happy?

So Mr. Clean can't work up the nerve (respect, dignity, honor)  to come ask me how I am or to talk to me (or even call me or SMS me to ask), but this weekend, he asked his brother, "Is she happy?" The response was, "Yes she's happy.... She's with your family every weekend."  (I LOVE that!)

Why is he even bothering to ask?

At Friday lunch, his dad sat on one side of me, his step mom on the other.  They told me Clean's latest excuse.... that he disappeared because he was angry with me because I wouldn't get him (like you can go to a store or something) a visa to visit my family in the States.  Whaaaaaat???  Dadman said, "I know.  That's just another excuse.  You don't love someone based on their ability to get you a visa."  I love his dad and his practical outlook on everything.

Then they both told me that Clean had planned to marry me and discussed it at length with them (and other family members).  Everybody was happy about it.  And they still don't understand what happened. (They always give me bits and pieces at lunch - never the full story.) They also told me that way before he ever said anything mean and cruel to ME about kids, he told his dad that none of that matters to him; that he loved me so much that he didn't care. (I wish he would have told me that before I felt like crap and spent so much time in tears.)  Where did that man go?

His step-mom tells me to be patient.  She still believes he's testing me before marriage (guess it's an Arab thing?)  I told her that I had tested him too; it is a 2-sided story; and that he has failed miserably. Who disappears like that?  Who starts talking divorce before ever formally asking? How could I ever trust someone like that?   I told his step-mom that I'm American and if he had said HALF of the stuff he said to me to a Kuwaiti girl, she would have hit him upside the head with her shoe.  (I can see it.  Picture this:  Cute little Kuwaiti woman, and him sitting there with his smug grin...  "I will marry a second wife and there's nothing..." (and then, before he even has the rest of the words out).... WAABAP!  She smacks him upside the head with her sandal, while screaming some insults and dialing her family with her free hand.)   Step-mom thought about it for a minute (guess she was conjuring the visual too) and completely agreed. (Why you think you can say that to me?  Huh?  Huh?  Why you gotta go there? You think I'm an American blue light special? What am I - discount girl?)

I love being able to talk to his family like this.  However reeeeeeedonkulous it all is.

Anyhoooser....   I had a great weekend!  Mashallah, Mashallah, Mashallah.

I've been on an emotional high ever since Friday night when an inebriated best friend blurted out a secret regarding me and a mutual friend.  (Sigh, big smirky grin....)

On another note, I keep falling asleep where ever I go.  Thursday night, I was with DGY at the Secret Hawalli Hide Out and as usual, I fell asleep on the sofa while the guys talked like a bunch of little girls for hours.  Then, Friday night at the Secret Kabd Hide Out, there was too much loya/chaos going on inside, so I went outside to get some air and ended up falling asleep on the sedu pillows under the stars in beautiful weather.  Perfect timing 'cause a few hours later when I woke up, the machboos was ready and the sun was coming up.

The two trashy girls wearing really cheap clothes served it up for me.  It was only the second time I had met them.  They came with their boyfriends (one of them was a cousin of our regulars').   I guess you really can't judge a book by its cover (I lie - most of the time, you can):  They turned out to be (trashy-clothes-wearing) very intelligent women with super-cool jobs.  I really like them.  I guess some of these girls just want to OTT cut loose on the weekends.  Seriously though, I don't need to see their panties through their clothes (we're talking toile-covered-tushy).  Why?  Can't you cut loose and cover yourself?    I don't need to be seeing anybody elses' junk.  Really.  Just sayin.  I gots my own junk.  I don't even want to see that.

Yesterday, I had coffee with La Senza - which is always refreshing; catching up and gossiping and all that.   Then, I went back to The Kingdom for dinner with another friend and got to play with his bunnies (no.... that is NOT code).  Real bunnies.

Is she happy?  Did I mention that there were boys and food and bunnies?  What do you think?


Thursday, October 03, 2013

Stank Eye

Also known as "hot eyes" around here....  Somebody gave it to me after all my yakkin about how happy I was to be driving DGY's sexyass truck.  I shoulda said, "Mashallah" more often (I'm very superstitious and there are stank eyes everywhere here).

I was supposed to meet DGY at his house, so that we could go together to pick up my car from the mechanics in Shuwaikh.

By-the-by:   I HATE Shuwaikh even more than I hate Hawalli.  If there are areas in Kuwait that I try to avoid:  it's those two (and, of course, Hassawi - not that I would ever have the need to go there again).  It is a combination of the Wild West and Cairo.  There are no lanes, no laws, no rules, and it is every man/woman/child for themselves.  I almost killed a child in Hawalli  when a 4-year-old ran in front of my car.  I was able to stop in time and then turned to its mother who just shrugged and walked away.  I thought I was going to go after her and kill her.  Woulda been better so she wouldn't spawn any more offspring.  Anyhoo....

Ok, back to my story.  So, I was in my area and wanted to be nice and fill the truck up with gas after I had been using it (all over Kuwait and back). Let me translate a little:  I didn't want DGY to know exactly how much time I had spent in his truck, driving around feeling cool, so gas usage was an issue.

I filled up and then went to start it again and the engine wouldn't turn over W.T.F.!! OMG.  The lights all worked, all the electronics were fine.  But it just wouldn't turn over.  I was AT the gas pump - and  you know how "patient" people are at the gas stations in Kuwait.  Anyhoo, people were honking, trying to get around me, giving me dirty looks.  Four gas station attendants schooled me on how to put the car in gear and turn the key - repeatedly.  That's just reeedonkulous, so shut uuuuuup.

Those guys ended up pushing it out of the way.  I called DGY.  It's so embarrassing when you are driving someone else's car and it breaks down.  He just laughed and said he would call a tow truck ("wench" over here.  As in, "I'll get my wench to tow it.")

45 minutes later, he arrived (traffic in Kuwait is a BITCH these days!).  Get this.  I swear to God, I still can't believe it....  He leaned in, turned the key, and the engine started. He didn't even have his full body inside the cab, just one cheek and a leg.   He laughed.  He was so nice about it.  I felt like a moron.  He told me that he just bought a new battery.

I think its the transmission.  It didn't feel right and it wasn't switching into higher gear on the highway.  That's just my hypothesis.

Oh, so my car is fine.  I had to have the rocker arms adjusted and got new engine mounts.  (I did NOT drive fast over speed bumps in my Camaro!)  It could have been from all the driving I've done in the desert.  I have come to the conclusion that it really isn't an off-road vehicle.  Imagine that.

Seriously.... I want the truck back.  Maybe he'll let me pull the boat.  Wanasa, y'alls!

Wednesday, October 02, 2013

Re-heating leftovers after their expiration date

So here's the thing:  Clean dumped me.  Anything is fair game after all the awful, unkind things he said and did to me.  I can do whatever I want/see whoever I want.  I know that.  But.... the stupid-lame-pathetic-girl side of me (label it whatever) still says, 'He's testing you.  He wants to go out in the world and make a better life for both of you and he'll be back and everything will be just as it should have been.  Be careful now what you do and who you see.'

I know - phuck that, right?

But it's what I do.  I don't want anyone to blame me.  I don't want to do anything wrong.  Even after all the shitty things the guy has done to me, I am still considering HIS feelings above my own.  I'm an EFNJ personality and I hate it sometimes.  (Being a guy and having an EFNJ woman is really cool for the guy by the way.)

I did it with The Man.  I did it with Desert Guy.  Perhaps there is an appropriate waiting period before you jump into something else with someone else.  Yet again, perhaps there isn't and you should just do whatever happens next.

It took me almost 2 years to recover from The Man.  I was an emotional wreck; regardless of what I let on to other people.  With Desert Guy, I didn't have the same feelings because it was a platonic relationship (yes, I shit-you-not).  Months of nights spent together alone in a tent - talking.  Maybe he just wasn't that into me (but I could tell that he was and I always knew that he loved me); maybe he was tired of that kind of girl and wanted to get to know someone who just wanted him for himself/who he is.  Whatever.

I had a 2-year platonic relationship with my x-fiance too.  That's why we were so solid; we knew each other in a totally different way.  However, if you're platonic, you don't have the emotional bonds that you would in an intimate relationship.  Its kind of the glue that cements your love.  Without it, it becomes much easier to walk away and rebound (at least for a woman, I think, as we tie a lot more emotions to intimacy than I think the average guy does).

Anyways, with The Man and Clean, both were intense and passionate relationships; the kind that I have a hard time recovering from.  They were also serious to the point of marriage and both-sides family involvement (as was my engagement also - too much so, actually).

So having said that... the leftovers part.....

I have been spending time with Desert Guy.  As friends.  He has been incredibly endearing and kind lately.  I think he can tell I'm hurting over something, but he is not the type of guy to ask (unless it is somehow gently brought into conversation and only then to lead me to talk about it if I want).

Our birthdays are the 16th and 17th of April. We are both Aries.  We are both hot-headed, stubborn, and a little controlling.  We fell into that pattern in our previous relationship.

I am, for all practical purposes, in love with someone else now (although he's gone).  I'm not in love with Desert Guy anymore.  I love him, but I'm not in love with him.  It's just really comfortable - and it probably is because I'm not in any emotional danger with him at the moment.

When we were together before, he told me (and friends) that he thought I was "the one".  BS or no BS, all the signs are there.  He's not the same person he was 8 months ago; neither am I.  He's no longer on his phone all the time (if anything, I've tried to curb my chatting while I'm with him - I've turned into the violator).  From the amount of time I have spent with him (which has been a LOT lately), there is no one else on the scene.  Maybe it is just a slow time for him in the world of dating, I don't know, but it is good so far.

DGY has been OTT respectful to me lately and so have all his friends.  You know your significant other is into you when his best friends are into you.  I've got 'em.  (Like SJP in "Failure to Launch" who won Tripp's friends over during a paintball match.  When she had the "look of approval" she knew she was IN.)

He's taking me to get my car fixed.  He's lending me his car...

Oh, he lent me his Dodge Ram pick up.  Now, women in Kuwait rarely rarely drive pick-up trucks.  It isn't done.  I think I've seen ONE woman in 17 years driving one.  And a blonde driving one - unheard of.  I'm LOVIN it.  I don't know if I'll ever give it back.  So much fun! (Mashallah)


Anyhoo, I'm comfortable for right now.  I'm happy (Mashallah).  I feel better about everything having some male attention from someone that I feel-in-me-bones cares about me.  And cares about me not for any reason.  He's got what he needs and more.  He doesn't need anything from me.  Nothing physical or material.  And, from everything he is saying and doing; he wants to take care of me, which is something that a man hasn't done for me in a loooooong time.


Monday, September 30, 2013

Cheech Al-Flan



Arab Times repost, Sept 28, 2013: Barely two days after departing Kuwait to begin his tertiary education in the United States, Kuwaiti student Ahmad Adel Abdul-Hussein was deported back to Kuwait from Los Angeles, reports Al-Watan Arabic daily. According to Ahmad, the US authorities claimed he was Mexican by nationality and birth and had found errors in his traveling passport and the arrival time. Earlier in 2011, the student secured approval of the Higher Education Ministry to study in the US and joined an institute in October the same year before gaining admission to a university later. He said the US immigration officers detained and grilled him inside a dark room at Los Angeles Airport and his efforts to reach officials of the Kuwaiti Embassy on phone proved futile, as nobody picked his calls. 

Consequently, he left a voice message while he remained in detention until 3:00am. He stressed that FBI agents moved him to an underground detention outside the airport the next day and was chained and led back to the airport later. He explained that all European airlines they approached refused to carry him, so security officers continued making contacts for seven hours until American Airlines transported him to London. He said the US officials delivered him to their counterparts at Heathrow Airport and was referred to the Kuwaiti counter with his passport, grilling documents and reports which indicated US officials had punched his passport, stamped deportation on his passport and revoked his visa, with several other allegations.

He reiterated he remained a bonafide student of his university until the day of his deportation, even though the US authorities based his deportation on failure to meet stipulated conditions, reiterating he never committed any offense throughout his stay in that country. He noted the Kuwaiti Consul in Los Angeles contacted him after he arrived in Kuwait to find out what had happened. He urged the Ministry of Higher Education to help him complete his education in the United Kingdom.


----

OOPS!  
No really, our TSA's are some of the most sophisticated in the world....
"Well, Billy Bob... he looks like oner dem 'Mexicans...."

I also blame the Kuwaiti officials in the States.  I can tell you first-hand how hard it often is to get someone to answer the phone there.  And if it is after working hours - you're F-ed.

The 7 Words You Don't Want to Hear... when approaching a weekend checkpoint in Kuwait

"Stop the car.  I'm going to vomit."
No no noooooooooooooooo!!!!  Not HERE.  Not NOW.


So let me back up a little.  Riyadh (as in the guy from Riyadh who drove 7 hours last time to take me to dinner)  came to visit me this weekend.  It was lovely of him to take time off work, get on a plane, rent a car... all to come see me.

Expectations are NOT a good thing.  I was expecting romantic dinners, walks, spending time together. Always lower your expectations so that you're not disappointed.  I guess what I should have expected was more along the lines of, "I don't want to go to dinner.  I'm on a diet."  Em... ok... well, I'm hungry....  What about me?  I made a sandwich.  (Guess all that food I bought for his visit was for naught.)

When someone comes to visit you, you also find out a lot about their character.  Riyadh and I immediately were not well suited for each other.  He's persnickety.  By that, I mean fussy and annoying.  Too many questions.  Too much drama over little details.  It was tiring.

But, of course, that wasn't the "fun" part!

The first night he arrived, I offered to take him to visit my friends.  He had asked to meet my friends when he got here.  So I agreed. But that led to questions like, "Who will be there?"  "How long have you known them?" "Is it couples? What kind of people are they?"  Dude, are you coming or not?  I shouldn't have gone.  I shoulda known better.  Nipped it in the bud.  But, we went.

After 3 glasses, Riyadh is in the soup.  With one hand on one of the girls, the other holding my hand, he's whispering in my ear that I, "May be the one he's been looking for."   Oh, aren't I the lucky girl?

I decide it is time to go home.  We get into the car.  He's asking ME if I am ok to drive.... like I'm going to let HIM get behind the wheel.

The first time was on the highway.  "Stop the car....I'm going to vomit.  I'm sorry.  I'm sorry."  Ok fine.  (I'm wishing we had taken his rental car.)  The second time was closer to home.  I pulled off somewhere out of the way for that one.  "Where are we?  Are we close?"  We're almost home.... and then...  I see the line of cars with the flashing lights at the front.  Oh fuuuuuuuuu.....

And one more time.... "Stop the car....."  Oh nooo!!!!  Not HERE.  Not NOW.   OhmaGod, OhmaGod, OhmaGod.   That would have done it.  It would have been public and over.  But, he held it.

The cop took my license, registration, and civil ID. No problem there.  Then asked for Riyadh's. Luckily, I had asked him in advance to have it ready, and he did.  He still had a hard time just handing it to the guy.  The cop said, "Pull over to the right."

SNAP!

So, I did.  Various boys in other sports cars stared.  A ranking officer walked - not to MY side of the car, but Riyadh's side of the car, and asked for his ID. I was in the clear, but if they asked us for blood, I likely might have trace amounts (ANY alcohol is illegal and you can be arrested).  Not cool.  There was a lot of close-up-sniffing by the officer, discussion of family ties and general questions.  The guy knew.  Riyadh knew dude knew;  he finally fessed up and the officer basically told him, "why didn't you just tell me so?"  Let us go.

WHEW!!!

So, I took the back roads from there.  2 more vomit stops (one very close to a police station) and we finally arrived home. Riyadh had a nice comfortable sleep:  On my carpet on my guest bathroom floor.  I checked on him 3 times.  He seemed to be still breathing.

The rest of the weekend kinda went like that. We did manage to go to a few malls... that was it.  Even at the malls -  we went places, but not together.  He wanted to go walking (which I translated to seeing Kuwait alone).  I went and did my own thing - alone.

Bye!  Have a nice trip back to from-where-you-came....

And I missed seeing my Kuwaiti family on a Friday.  The first time in months and months.  I miss them so bad.  I don't want to do that again. I was all sniffly and whimpery on Friday afternoon.  Didn't like it 'tall.

.... but now, let me tell you about the BEST part of the weekend....

Desert Guy.  (Sigh)  Now, I know I shouldn't be re-warming leftovers after their expiration date, but.... It is just so comfortable.  Now I KNOW him.  I know how to deal.

Thursday night (before Riyadh showed up on Friday), I cooked dinner (yes yes, I did too!  Shrimp...)  and brought it over to the Hawalli Secret Hide Out (that's his secret hide out, not mine.  Mine is in Kabd.)  He and I and 3 of our mutual friends watched TV and talked all night.  I fell asleep on the sofa feeling completely comfortable in their company.  I woke up and DGY gave me hugs and kissed my hand.  Sigh.  FRIENDS.

DGY's friend, Z, asked me about this year and what I had done since I saw them in February.  I reluctantly told him that I needed to withdraw from everybody.  He said, "It sounds like you were broken."  I guess I was.  That is exactly how I felt.

When I was "broken", then I found Clean.  Maybe he was part of my recovery.  Maybe I could pick up the pieces and put myself together for something better.  I dunno.  I feel a lot more "solid" (if you can call it that) now.

DGY and I never talk about Teddy or any of the other friends.   We're just enjoying being together.  His friends seem a lot more supportive.  DGY and I are ONLY FRIENDS and that's the way I'm looking at it. I'm not making any promises.  I don't expect him to.  But it is just fun.  If it stops being fun, I'll stop visiting.

Note of appreciation:  Without La Senza prompting me, I might not have posted about this, but she seems to find hilarity in my life and foibles, so here it is.  Thanks, Girl. 

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Who remembers Kuwait when...


  • Khaleejiya Building was the tallest building downtown
  • THE mall was Laila Gallerie
  • Shawarmas were 250 fils
  • Hungry Bunny and Happy Duck were the best places for fast food
  • Snacks restaurant's servers were all little people (if you can remember Snacks)
  • Guys threw cassette tapes with their phone numbers on them to girls in traffic
  • Friday market was topless (didn't have a roof)
  • The best singles place in town was The Sultan Center, Salmiya, on weekend nights
  • Weekends were Thursday and Friday
  • There was a grounded ship (which was actually a Marriott Hotel) at the end of Gulf Road (where KPC HQ is now)
  • Sheikh Fahad's Lincoln Continental on the Gulf Road across from what is now the aquarium
  • When there was no aquarium 
  • The Drive In movie at 6th Ring Road and 50 (where 360 is now)
  • When Kout Mall was a sand pit next to a harbor for small boats


Got any more?

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

iWeapon




I SO want one of these.  The PINK one!   It's a taser attachment for your iPhone.  Who the F KNEW???  Mommy, it's what I want for Christmas, ok?

It is an iPhone case that houses a 650K volt stun gun and is capable of giving your phone up to 20 hours of additional standby battery!  $139 (40kd).

See CNN's Report HERE.


Monday, September 23, 2013

Um-A and other women I admire (and Dunkin-Donuts-Induced hachi el fathi)

I talked to Cleans step-mom, Um-A,  last night.  She made me feel better - as always.  I wanted to apologize to her for being so nervous at Friday Family Lunch (that's right, haters, I have lunch every Friday afternoon with my ARAB x-boyfriend's ENTIRE BEDOUIN FAMILY in a BEDOUIN/conservative area) after I saw Mr. Clean.

Um-A is  is very sweet, very welcoming, very soft-spoken.  Tells me that she loves me often.  Tells me that Clean loves me often (some things are easier to believe than others given the circumstances). She also makes excellent lunches.  Abu-A always sits next to me and piles more and more food on my plate and they always send me home with to-go packages (which I end up eating for lunch and dinner for the next few days to follow).

I wish I could be more like Um-A; forgiving, kind, never-says-a-harsh-word kind of woman. She has a very calming affect on me.  I know several more of those type of women who I should pay more attention to as role models.  Instead, I'm me; going Pompeii when confronted.

My mom prays for me.  Um A prays for me.  Why can't I just be better and being forgiving and kind to others?  Why can't I just "turn the other cheek" or the equivalent?  Why do I have all this pent-up rage (ok, that could just be LackO'Nookie)?

I think it is easy to get frustrated; or at least place blame on frustration.  I use "Kuwait" or "this part of the world" as an excuse, but truth be told, I was equally as nervous living in the outskirts of DC, worrying about how I was going to juggle my bills every month, fighting traffic and road rage (with people who are actually LEGALLY allowed to carry concealed weaponry) and dealing with people who looked down on my for my lack of higher education (even though they received their degrees from Podunk U in Bumfuck, Midwest). Now I've got a good job (where people listen to what I have to say based on merit, not what's hanging on my wall), a beautiful home, and much less worry about bills and armed road rage (for as much as I poke fun at Abdulfettah; things have seemed to have calmed down on the roads a lot since his Reign of Terror).

Ok, enough about that.  I gots to go call my sisters and some girlfriends tonight.

Ok, I am definitely NOT Mother Teresa....


Sunday, September 22, 2013

Kissed by a camel

(No, I'm talking about a REAL camel, pervs!)

After the Pompeii ordeal with Clean, my usual Secret Hide Out Crew called to tell me to git over there.  Halfway to the Kingdom of Kabd, they called back and changed plans.  OMG.  (What is UP with people these days?)  So, just like that, not 5 minutes later, some old(er) friends called with a farm a little past the Secret Hide Out and said, "Hey, where have you been??  It's been MONTHS.  Come over..." So, je did.

I didn't know they had camels.  I knew they had Johnny and Mr. Smirnoff, but I never saw the camels behind the big fence.

Things I've learned about going to see livestock:  Do NOT wear your Kenneth Cole 4" heels.  I just took them off (I probably got foot and mouth disease or something, but better than wrecking expensive comfortable sexy shoes).

Anyhoooser, there was a mommy and baby camel and the baby camel, Ablaa, came over and kissed me on the mouth.  OMG, how cuuuuuuuuuuuute!  She was so frickin adorable.  I tried to take pics, but they just didn't come out (too dark, even under a full moon).  What a great night.

I love going to visit OLD friends.  Always happy to see me and just hang.

Yesterday, I spent the entire day in the water at the beach with Desert Guy.  I missed him.  He's better as a friend than a boyfriend.  It sounds like he's nostalgic.... Said a lot of "stuff".... Don't know how that all is going to work out, but we'll see.  Thankfully, we're not talking about ancient history or ancient people.  Bygones.  Just hanging with his group of friends and going to visit other people.

I slept really good last night - and the night before.  I thought I was going to be all wound up, but I was good.

I Snapped.... The "Gone Pompeii" Post

I am guilty of some very low-class behavior and to be quite honest, there are pros and cons to it.  I don't know if I feel bad or good about it.  Although, I am bordering more on the "I shouldn't lower myself to him" and "I done wrong."

I saw Clean at his dad's house this weekend.  It's his house (not where he lives, but it's still his home).  He can come and go as he wishes.  But he knew I would be there.  His dad and step-mom promised me a thousand times that he wouldn't be there.  They fibbed.  I believe it was all in the name of getting us back together.

Not a good idea.  Hell hath no fury like... well, like ME.  Zero to biotch in 2.5 seconds....

He acted as if nothing had happened.  Walked right over, grabbed my hand, kissed me on both cheeks.   Complimented me (I did look good that day).  Smiled.  Joked.  In front of the whole family.

What infuriated me the most was the pretending that nothing had ever happened.  He just walked in like he had done nothing wrong.  He could have chosen to talk to me before showing up.  He could have apologized anytime during the weeks since August 11th when I last saw him (2nd day of Eid, the day after I got back from the States).  He chose not to.  He just pretended nothing had happened between him.  "And so you're back, from outer space.  I just walked in to find you here with that sad (although he didn't look sad) look upon your face...."

His brothers (my "allied forces") remained quiet, but later told me that they were shocked and saddened by what they saw him do.  It was like he just didn't care about me and wanted me to know it.


Fire is not what I was feeling inside.  Maybe something like Pompei or Chernobyl.  I didn't blow.  Not ....quite....yet....

His step-mom asked him to sit next to me, was being very complimentary of him, "Oh look, (he) is cares about you.  He's giving you the best food..."  Hold it together, Desert Girl.  She's a kind, decent, righteous woman who only wants the best for you.  She's not your target.

I never got a visual on my target because I refused to look at him.  As soon as he was close, I looked at the ground or away.  He made it a point to get into my line of sight.

So while he was in another room, I made my polite exit to the family and left.

My reaction didn't come until later.  And I wasn't even planning it.  I guess I was in a state of shock.  I wasn't thinking about anything except how I would get out of the house.... and then all of a sudden, as soon as I was home in SANcuARY, waaaaBAM!

I am the queen of evil SMSs.  I don't need to write a letter.  I can bang out 1000 SMSs simultaneously.  And I gave it to him good.  Therefore, so happened the low-class behavior by me.  I used every means of degrading terminology I could think of, starting with "If you EVER touch me again, be it my hand or anywhere else, I will make sure that you can never have children..." By the time I was done, I had a terrible headache and a whole lot of bad-karma points racked up against me.  Not good.

I'm sorry, God.  I failed you.

A very nice, soft-spoken African man who was at Camel Farm listened while I told him the story.  He quietly said, "I'm sure he knows that you are very hurt and angry.  I'm sure he knows you didn't mean it."  It was nice.  Not an out, but nice.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Starbucks: No Guns Please

Article from NPR  LINK

With the coffee giant caught in the middle of what he says is an "increasingly uncivil and, in some cases, even threatening" debate, Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz has posted a letter to "fellow Americans" asking that they not bring guns into Starbucks' shops.
Schultz writes that:

"Our company's longstanding approach to 'open carry' has been to follow local laws: we permit it in states where allowed and we prohibit it in states where these laws don't exist. We have chosen this approach because we believe our store partners should not be put in the uncomfortable position of requiring customers to disarm or leave our stores. We believe that gun policy should be addressed by government and law enforcement — not by Starbucks and our store partners.

"Recently, however, we've seen the 'open carry' debate become increasingly uncivil and, in some cases, even threatening. Pro-gun activists have used our stores as a political stage for media events misleadingly called 'Starbucks Appreciation Days' that disingenuously portray Starbucks as a champion of 'open carry.' To be clear: we do not want these events in our stores. Some anti-gun activists have also played a role in ratcheting up the rhetoric and friction, including soliciting and confronting our customers and partners.

"For these reasons, today we are respectfully requesting that customers no longer bring firearms into our stores or outdoor seating areas—even in states where 'open carry' is permitted — unless they are authorized law enforcement personnel."

Time writes that "while the company is planning to run ads in major U.S. newspapers on Thursday asking customers to avoid bringing guns into the store, Schultz says no official ban will be instituted."

Baristas apparently won't try to deny service to gun-carrying customers and won't ask them to go elsewhere. The Associated Press says it was "provided a picture of a memo to Starbucks employees on Tuesday. 

Partners are instructed not to confront customers or ask them to leave solely for carrying a weapon."
National Journal wrote back in August about how thousands of customers were planning to bring their guns along for a "Starbucks Appreciation Day." Several posters on the "Starbucks Appreciation Day" Facebook page are upset about the new policy.


The AP notes that "several companies do not allow firearms in their stores ... apparently with little trouble. Representatives for Peet's Coffee & Tea and Whole Foods, for example, said there haven't been any problems with enforcing their gun bans."

Young and Beautiful

This is my new favorite song.  It reminds me of Shamlan:  RIP, baby.  You are always with me. Always young and beautiful.  I miss you.  We met in July.  He died many years later in June.  He's my endless summer.



Me neither.


How all this technology BS ruins everything good and decent


I’ve been cyber-"checking on" a certain individual.  Bygones, but  I suspected there was stuff out there;  I just wanted to see what is on PUBLIC record – for the ENTIRE world to view.


It isn't "stalking" if it is on public domain (just like he can view what I have on the blog now).  I don't comment, follow-up; nothing I do makes any difference one way or another.  What is there is there. Anyone (including me, his mother, his sisters, his brothers....) can see it.

Yes, I have put an end to him in my life;  but I needed verification, validation, closure.  I've had a nagging feeling and I wanted to know for sure.  So, now I know.

If a user name or an account starts or ends with a heart on it.... Houston, we have a problem.  His Twitter, Kik, and Viber accounts all had heart-ons. ('Are you still looking for love while you're with me?  Should I add some heart-on's too?')   I was also concerned with the amount of (seemingly anonymous) females he had added to Facebook, Instagram, and other accounts.  He also frequently changed his photos (yes, many, many photos of him -- you are NOT famous!) on his profiles (even on TrueCaller).   It was a constant cause for never-ending arguments between us.

Him:  "It is just an app. "My phone life is my private life!"  (Yes, secret, bimbo-infested "private life.")
Me:  'Really....  here's my phone (handing it to him).  You can keep it for a few days and check whatever you want to check. Talk to my friends.  Answer.  I have no secrets from someone I'm intimately involved with;  and I don't want to be with anyone who has them.  Not big ones anyways.  I can't say that people aren't "allowed" secrets.  It is just the relationship-altering ones that I'm opposed to. The internet and/or your phone is just another medium for you to meet women, regardless on how you follow-through.  You can't deny that you are meeting them, at least online, because I see you.'

To me, it is just infidelity, regardless.  He usually tried to flip-it, turning me into an overly-jealous, insecure female, adding insult to injury, "You are small minded..." (His actual words were, "You have a little mind." but that's what it translated to.)  Really?  Because I won't let you play?  Awwwwwww, habiiiiibiiiii.....

Stats:



Should  I choose to be in a relationship, I don’t cheat/cyber cheat/cheat in real life – whatever.   Why waste my time?  If I feel like I need to be with more than that person, then I shouldn’t be in a relationshit, right?

You know, it is just stupid:  Anybody can play the kids game and a whole lot of "men" (and women) are doing it; regardless of their age/education/occupation.  My married friends in Kuwait tell me about it.  My single friends tell me about it.  It's ruining a lot of lives.


Desert Girl "How-To":    CHECK on your Significant Other (SO) on the Internet:     It is easy to do.  You get an e-mail address (even one time), do a Google search, and see where it leads you.  In this case -  to a single user name on a single site. One solitary internet comment using an anonymous username.  From there, Google search by the user name...

.... and where there's smoke, there's fire:  WAABAM!  Tons of information on (this particular individual)!  Dating sites, photos of half-neked women (boobs, butts, and girls of obviously poor upbringing), video clips WITH his voice on voice-over (during a time frame when I was with him), comments on other sites, photos and comments of women who he’s chatted with dating back years.  (And you wanted ME to wear hijab??  Really???  Et furthermore, why is almost every posting you have of a religious nature when your actions speak volumes that you are NOT  a righteous man?)  Bygones.  Verification.  Code Red Alert attained.

Women just want to feel secure with the man they are with.  (Boys don't count.) 

I think with some people, the technology becomes an obsession.  "Hunting" becomes the obsession - the "thrill of the chase."   Or maybe the women become an obsession - I don't know. It's a sickness, regardless.  He's probably into internet porn too.  There's probably more; and if not now, it will escalate to that.  Maybe Twitter, Instagram, Kik, Keek are just "gateway apps."

I have been followed by some of his little internet girls wanting to know more about me. I put an end to that after they left some not-nice comments.  (Tell me again why you wear hijab?  "Virtue"? "Modesty"?)   These games are ridiculous.  Blog haters got nothing on these ho's.  

Sidenote:   I deleted my Tango account.  I was receiving video calls from people in Kuwait in the middle of the night.  They can call you and the camera may be on and you won't even know it.  RRRR!  Privacy!


Look at the divorce stats in Kuwait (again, I'm going to keep bringing this up).  What does it all come down to?  Everybody seems to be on a never-ending chase in this country for the next-best-thing; collecting rocks when they hold diamonds in their hands.  

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:    I'm looking for a caveman who doesn't own (or want to use) a smartphone to chat with bimbos; who is connected with nature and the Earth (maybe a guy who owns a herd of camels?)  Internet pervs need not apply.

Am I bitter?  Nooooo, I'm better. :)  God reveals all in time and you are exactly where you are supposed to be - right now:   Feelin' S E C U R E


More about Abdulfettah Satire Circulation

Al-Ali’s Pictures ‘Posted’ On Social Networking Sites
Arab Times


KUWAIT CITY, June 22: Assistant Undersecretary for Traffic Affairs at the Ministry of Interior Major General Abdul Fattah Al-Ali is being represented in a comical manner on social networking websites, reports Al-Seyassah daily.

One of the users created a picture by placing three photos of Al-Ali with three different facial expressions onto each of the lights of a traffic signal. He/she had placed a picture of Al-Ali grinning on the green light, Al-Ali smiling on the yellow light and a photo of him frowning on the red light.

A user narrated the story of how his sports car was impounded and another user posted a picture he created of President Obama watching Al-Ali on TV and laughing.

A picture of Al-Ali standing along with the actors of ‘Fast and Furious’ was also posted on social networking sites.

---
First of all:  'Posted on' is an actually term.  No need for the (incorrectly placed) apostrophes (where they should have been incorrectly placed quotation marks - IF the term warranted the use of quotation marks - which it did not).  

This is old news.  Clean said that when he was in Phuket, there were so many Kuwaitis in the bars/nightclubs that they had video clips of Abdulfettah playing on the big-screen TVs.

(The more I think about it, the more I think that Clean met a Kuwaiti girl in Phuket - not a local girl.  That would make sense.  See "Kuwait Divorce Stats" above.  Bless their hearts.  I'm guessing that by November, she'll figure out all about him and I'll be getting a lot of flowery SMSs again.  Just a hypothsis.  I'm onto his BS; read above.)

Kuwait Divorce Stats: 55% couples married in last 4 years seek divorce

Kuwait Times today

KUWAIT: Almost 55 percent of couples filing for divorce in Kuwait have been married for four years only, including 25 percent who are yet to celebrate the first anniversary of their wedding, a local daily reported yesterday quoting official statistics. The statistical report released by the Research and Statistics Department in the Ministry of Justice and obtained by Al- Qabas daily further indicates that out of 5,662 couples who sought marriage counseling, only 20 percent had their issue successfully resolved.

Lack of willingness to coexist was identified as the primary cause for divorce requests, with 32 percent of the requests made by husbands and 23 percent by wives.

The statistics further indicate that 77 percent of couples who attended marriage counseling were Kuwaitis compared to 22 percent non-Kuwaitis.

Meanwhile, 62 percent of those couples do not have children, 34 percent have one to three children, and 2.7 percent have between four and six children.


Regarding age groups, the statistics show that 42 percent of couples seeking marriage counseling are aged between 25 and 34, 22 percent aged between 35 and 44, and 20 percent aged between 15 and 25. And according to the couples’ academic levels, the statistics indicate that 28 percent of husbands have middle school degrees, 22 percent have high school degrees and 21 percent have university degrees, whereas 27 percent of wives have high school degrees, 23 percent have university degree, 22 percent have diploma and 20 percent have middle school degree.

---

15 years old?  Seriously?  

Wow.  This is a serious problem.  I think people here have outrageous expectations of what married life should be like.  Its a bad cycle.

Arab Times Poll, 19 September


If mommy and daddy are doing it with other people, don't assume that the kids aren't smart enough to recognize it.  Lead by example:  Don't show them that it is acceptable.  It will become a viscious cycle to the next generation.

"My kids don't know..."
"My wife doesn't know...."
Sure they do!  And they're doing to be doing it too.  

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Kuwait Times Story on Shankar - Indian Landmine Victim

A while back, I posted about Shankar who had lost his legs and eyes from a land mine accident here in Kuwait.  The Kuwait Times picked up on the story (Thank you, YouKnowWhoYouAre!) and published it yesterday.

PLEASE donate - even a small amount - if you can.





Monday, September 16, 2013

Dude (The Post About Hatahs and Tomfoolery)


Lovin the hate mail.

Not going to publish it. You're wasting your time.  My blog.  My definition of "hater" or not hater.  The "truth" as you call it may be only your version of reality.  I have my own, thanks.  Call me pathetic and lonely,  but hey- you are the one reading this AND taking the time to comment, so therefore who is pathetic and lonely? ZZZZZZZZ snore.

Unlike some other blogs out there that tolerate tomfoolery, I don't care much about so-called "freedom of speech" here.  Nope.  If I don't like it, I'm going to zap it.  Zap zap.... zap. Buhbyyye.  Every GOOD media outlet in the world has editors.  Not everything makes it onto TV, into a newspaper, onto online stories.  I edit. I don't suffer fools.

Do I seem happier in my posts when I'm receiving male attention?  PHUCK YES.  That's my thing; my shtick; my happy place.  Everybody has their thing. (Some of my friends are into making millions.  I'm happy if a cute guy smiles at me....)   I'm shallow and vapid (you might have to go look up that word, huh?) and not very smart and if something/anything makes me happy, who are you to judge?  I realize that you're probably geniuses and incredibly good looking and have so much going on that you really shouldn't have time (but do) to read blogs like mine that are just so insignificant and small.  Oh yeah - and pathetic.  God bless your hearts.

Whew!  Glad I got that off my vapid-DD-male-attention-craving-chest.... So... onto something completely different....

Boy Updates (go to your Happy Place, Desert Girl....)

The Movie Star called me this weekend:  at 2:15am on Saturday morning.   (I knew he just wasn't into me.)  I sent him a nasty-gram.  "Delete my number.  If you couldn't call me during the past 2 weeks and then you drunk-dial me in the middle of the night, you are just another low-life (expletive).  Go (have intimate relations with) yourself."  Yes, it did feel good.  I think that countering rudeness with vulgarity and obscenities is, in itself by definition,  low-class, but YES felt damn good.  Like Stealth says, "Sometimes guys just don't have anything else going on at the moment, so what might feel like a connection to you is just time-spending to them."  Yup.

What else felt good?  Seeing Desert Guy again - this time as friends-only.  I hadn't seen him since before we closed the camp.  We didn't talk about anything.  Neither of us asked about mutual frienemies. We just enjoyed each other's company and laughed a little.  It was nice.  He looked good.  I have concluded that the guys I'm most likely to form a lasting attraction to are the tall ones with deep voices. He got that.  So does Clean....

Mr. Clean has made up with his family. He just appeared one day; didn't say anything.  Just walked in and said hello.   Dadman didn't want me to know and I think he invited him to lunch (on the day when I usually go for lunch with the family).  (I think he wants us back together.)  Clean didn't show up and I'm glad about that.  I found out during lunch which made me nervous.  I am SO GLAD that his dad is happy again (and glad that the parents are such kind, forgiving people).  Mashallah.  I don't want to be insulting or rude, but I think if Clean walked in, I would walk out.  I've discussed it with them and it is his home - not mine.  I have no right to dictate anything.  I have little right to be there (except that his parents and brothers and sister insist on it every week.)   But I just don't want to be there when he's there.  One of his brothers isn't as forgiving as the parents.  He's more along the lines of me - still feeling hurt and betrayed.  I can't imagine how his brother feels.  He's his brother AND best friend and Clean just dumped him.

Butterfly read my tarot cards back in the days when I first met Clean and it made ZERO sense to me then.  I probably didn't know him well enough.  I just came across my notes from the reading (while I was in a meeting) and it was a revelation.  It was completely accurate.  "Gross immaturity when confronted.  Tricked by fools gold...Infidelity"  Fassscinating.  (I have done several tarot readings since and I'm getting the SAME cards.  Butterfly says that I will keep getting them until I listen.) I think of tarot cards like reading a map:  you just read what you see, as they fall.  Sometimes they are accurate; sometimes they are not; sometimes you don't understand until later.

I haven't been to the desert in 10 days now and I'm not liking it.  I need to go feel some sand.  Connect with the Earth.  One of my friends owns a herd of camels.  I hope we can get there to see them soon. I love camels.  (Can you tell?)  I haven't even been to The Secret Hide Out for the past 10 days.  I've been too busy doing frivolous stuff - like winning contracts, writing new contracts.  (You know, the stuff that I don't write about.)

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Oh the Horror! Say it's not true! There's a crisis in Kuwait: Due to the expat crackdown there is now a shortage of maids and drivers

You have GOT to read this on Expat and the City's Blog.  FRICKIN HILARIOUS!!!

Oh the Horror! Say it's not true! There's acrisis in Kuwait: Due to the expat crackdown there is now a shortage of maids and drivers

I particularly enjoy this part:  

"You'll cherish his sudden interest in the children and staying home instead of every late night at the diwaniya with (Filipino, Egyptian, Lebanese and Moroccan 'entertainers')."

Which leads me to a quote a Kuwaiti friend stated to me once-upon-a-time, "If sex wasn't enjoyable/work, we'd have an Indian guy do it."

Great idea, girl!  This goes right along with my business idea of  "Blondes in Bikinis Car Wash."  One price for the car; another price for the show.




Stella predicts that the sale of plastic furniture will rise in the Country due to the shortage of maids.  Why?  because all you have to do to clean it is to hose it down.