I got a company phone today. Something is wrong. Why are people being nice to me? I don’t get it. This isn’t very Kuwait-like. I don’t even have to do anything for it, but… work…. That’s so odd. Huh…. Makes a Desert Girl wonder.
Ok, so I have a question regarding toilet seats. There are several things that disturb me about the ladies bathroom at new job. First, the toilets are pink. Who the F has pink toilets?? They aren’t even a cute pink. If pink was going to puke, it would be that color. Next… there are no toilet seats!! WHO DOES THAT?
My new boss lady, who I am going to call “Pixie Chick” from now on because she has an amazing haircut and if it doesn’t bother her too much, that’s her nick name. She kind of reminds me of those pictures of pixies with the big doe eyes.
Anyways, PixieChick said that the lack of toilet seats doesn’t bother her, but I can’t even imagine that. I’m a sitter. I layer the seat with stuff and I will probably bring in my own disinfectant (it is what I do – can’t help it). Who doesn’t (occasionally) sit? You’ve got to sit. Cold, puke-pink porcelain doesn’t do it for me. What if my bad knee gives out and I slip? Try explaining THAT to your new co-workers....
Readers, correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe I have discussed this before: the only time I am good at squat toilets is when I’m drunk, in the cold of the winter in the desert, in 4” heels and tight jeans. It was the way I learned how to do it and the only way I can do it now.
This is yet another excuse for me to run out to Ace Hardware and buy more needless shit (no correlation intended). I will buy a toilet seat. I think I can figure out how to install it (Butterfly, I need my tools back, honey.)
And now…. For something completely different….
I saw another cute dude on the elevator today. (What IS it about that office building and those elevators.) He was too short, so I didn’t give him face, but still – he invited me to ride up on the elevator with him (that sounds dirty, doesn’t it?) Tee hee.
----- Quick update of October 19 ---
I've decided that "Pixie Chick" doesn't suit. It's "Stella". It was my morning epiphany and I'm stickin too it.
----- Quick update of October 19 ---
I've decided that "Pixie Chick" doesn't suit. It's "Stella". It was my morning epiphany and I'm stickin too it.
LMAO!!
ReplyDeleteso i guess the infamous DG will be stayin' in the K-of-8 then?
*fingers crossed*
you took the idea behind a post right outta my head! theres this restaurant here, all fancy and everything, and they have the most amazing toilet you ever did see!
the "seat" has a plastic cover on it, and with the push of a button, this plastic cover is rotated and refreshed, ensuring safety and freedom from disease, as they so delicately put on the label. we should have these in kuwait, they're in frikkin' Saudi!
as far as the squatters loo, im glad to say i have never, nor will i ever, resort to such degradation. i would rather hold it in,, just sayin :P good on u for tryin it out tho
Lord - Obviously, Saudi butts are much cleaner... :P
ReplyDeleteSomebody told me recently that they had similar toilets in Dubai; push buttons on the walls did all kinds of fancy things to you like washing and drying your privates. Personally, I don't think I would ever get up.... but that's just me.
how tall are you for that elevator guy to be short ? ;p
ReplyDeleteand about the pink toilet seat, do you work in a an old american 50s diner perhaps ?? :p the one with the roller blade drive through ladies ? :P
..but squatting is so much healthier...check out this link: http://www.naturesplatform.com/health_benefits.html
ReplyDeleteIf you read this you'll wonder why the hell 'western style' loos were ever created! Get squatting everyone! Your colon will love you for it :)
www.urinal.net so you can see how your new ones compare
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletewow I have never laughed this much before!! i love ur humour....it reminds me of myself and i'm usually the only one laughing except for my sister who is a cool person. i have my bf in kuwait....and he wants me to move there....tough but i think im gonna go for it! and having ur blog will definitely make things easier!
ReplyDeleteHow is the toilets in Kuwait? Western style or squat style. I will be visiting Kuwait.soon..
ReplyDeleteDear Nelson,
ReplyDeleteComing to a foreign country can be a scary experience - especially when you venture into public toilets.
Public toilets in Kuwait: Avoid any places government-related would be my advice. Most of the malls and privately-owned toilets are fine.
Squat toilets are mostly outdated these days with the exception of traditional places; where you will find both. As a woman who enjoys the freedom of being about to wear tight jeans and stilettos, I have conquered the squat toilet to much acclaim; I can do it drunk or sober, in sickness and in health, in variations of seasonal changes. The squat toilet is not to be feared.
Most places in Kuwait have western-standard "sit" toilets. The differences in the bathrooms that you will find here will be:
Attendants. They can be annoying because they just stand there and you will get the puppy eyes until you give them a tip.
Bidets: OhmahGod I love bidets! Just be careful that if you are using one, you check the water temperature first. In the summer, you may just quite literally burn your ass. Bidets are just good, clean fun.
Water hoses: People use water in this part of the world to clean their private parts. (I do too - MUCH more sanitary and you have that clean, fresh feeling all day.) There are water hoses in every stall (and I miss them when I go back to the States).
I hope this helps answer your question.