US: Facebook Marketplace Saga

 I live in the US now, but I found that before I left Kuwait, I had similar experiences in trying to sell or give away items before I left.  I finally gave up and gave everything to friends (“Things I love to people I love.”)

Here is what happens now that I’m in the States.

Facebook Marketplace Saga

I have a guilty conscience about just about everything.  Is it the Irish part of me?  Is it because my grandparents went through the Great Depression and my grandmother (“Grammy”) instilled the “don’t waste!” moral code that passed down to me through my mother?  Whatever it is, if I think someone could used an item that is still in good condition or working order, I’m going to do my very very best to pass it along to them – whoever they are. (And sometimes that very very best turns out to be a big struggle!)

So,  in my attempts to find the “someone” who might want something/anything, I turn to Facebook; either my community “freecycle” pages or to Facebook Marketplace free items section.  Sometimes to Nextdoor.com, but their audience isn’t as wide.

My recent experience in giving away a used washing machine on Nextdoor.com morphed into my follow-on experience on FB.  A lovely man called to say he could pick up the washer from my basement immediately.  I asked that he have 2 people to carry it out (and I do this not only so the person heaving the machine up my stairs doesn’t hurt themselves, but also so there is no damage to my house (walls, banister, etc.)  He said there would be no issues.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t the case:  He brought his big teenaged son and his 5-month-pregnant wife to help.  I never imagined that the wife would be doing the heaving help while the hulky teenager stared at the floor and never uttered a word.  His dad mentioned that, “his thumbs work well because he plays video games all day.”  Yeah.  Kid didn’t offer to help his mother at all.  I did, but they wouldn’t allow it.  The staircase is such that only one person can get through at a time.  She pulled while hubby pushed.  A lot of instructional banter.  Fit/muscular/6’ kid continued his silent stare at the floor ( I don’t believe in child abuse, but I smacked him a lot inside my head).   45 minutes later, they were away.

A week later on FB Marketplace (the Walmart Shoppers of the give-away world – without riding the rascal).  I had previously sold a sectional sofa on FB and that is an entirely different saga.  I should have known better trying to give another one away.

This saga involved the gifting of a sofa used for 5 years by dogs, cat, and humans alike, but still in great condition.  My ad included, “Free sofa” with a description (including dimensions) and after the washer experience, detailed instruction of, “Must have 2 adult, non-pregnant people present to carry out.”  I advertised it in “fair” condition, noting that I have pets – if you have allergies, this may not be the sofa for you. 

I had over 30 responses.  Most just inquiries of, “Is it still available.”  If it is marked as, “available” on FB’s options of, “available,” “pending,” “in talks,” or “sold” – it is pretty self-explanatory (or so one would think).  Then there were those stating, “I can pick it up right now.”  Ok, what time?  Only to receive no answer.  Just to make this simple, here is the list of responses I got:

·         “How much is it?”  And yes, I advertised it as “FREE.”  To add to this common question, one woman and I had a humorous chat, “Is it free?”  Yes.  “How much does it cost?”  It’s free.  (2 days later):  Is it free.  (I looked up the exact definition of free and provided it to her): There is no price to the recipient. There are no hidden service fees or conditions requiring payment. The item or service is offered at zero cost.”  Then, I went on to provide the translation of free in several common local languages (Spanish, Farsi, Hindi, Arabic).  Her response:  “So, it is free?”  I’m actually enjoying the game at this point and I’m guessing she is messing with me so to continue:  It is $1,300.  Maria says, “I thought you said it was free?”  No sofa for you.

·         “Do you have animals?”  Emm, yes.  I think I stated that in the ad.

·         (Another inquirer) “Does it have pests?”  Dufuq?  Pests???  “I had to ask.”  No, you didn’t.  No sofa for you!

·         “If I pay you, will you deliver it to my house?”  No.  Did I mention it’s free?

·         “Can you hold it for me?  My (insert relative here:  mother, father, sister, brother, uncle, etc.) is busy until (insert day of the week here).  We can pick it up then.”  No.  First come, first served.

Then, the seemingly-serious wanna-be sofa owners start.  “I will pick it up on Tuesday at 5:30 if that’s ok”  Sure!  Please have 2 non-pregnant adults present to carry it out.  See you then.  5:30 comes and goes.  I’m ghosted.  This happened twice!  Then a young man who was very nice had to cancel because his helper was sick.  Could I hold it?  No sorry.

WHY am I doing this to myself?  My sister thinks I’m crazy (she’s not wrong).  Had I just called 1-800-JUNK, I could have saved myself so much time and effort and frustration, but at this point, I was too far into it. I’m no quitter.  Someone in need is going to take my damn sofa!

I changed the ad to read (yes, I posted this), “I’m tired of D-ing around with this sofa.  It goes to the dump on Friday if no one picks it up.”

Following that inclusion, “Spring” said she would send movers to my house that very day at 12:30 pm!  She even sent me the mover’s name, phone number, and an interactive tracking site so I knew where he was.  Wow!  Super professional of her.  Yeah… but wait….

Rodney the mover showed up at my house ON TIME and he was playing great music in his truck. I can’t remember the artist, but someone like Luther Vandross.  I immediately suspected that Rodney and I are of the same tribe.  His positive energy hit me right after the music; it was palatable.   But where was his helper?  The sofa is not small.  It is 8 feet long.  I worried about him, not any damage (but yeah, that too.)  He assured me there would be no problem.  We talked as he moved.  I offered to help, but he said he had it.  There was a little slight tiny damage point to the corner of my wall – nothing that I can’t have a handyman fix; which I related to him after his concern.  He gave me his number incase I need help in the future and off he went to Spring’s house.

No good deed goes unpunished.  I sent Spring a message saying that I was kinda upset that I specifically mentioned there should be 2 movers and yes, there was a little damage to my house.  Her response, “STFU you stupid b-tch.  You was gonna dump it.  Weird MF.”  Oh no she di’int!.   I was really angry (at myself and at her).  Thought about it for a few minutes and sent her a nice message back, ‘That was a very sweet and very grateful message.  Enjoy your new sofa.’  And blocked her from everything.

Thought about it for a few minutes and called Rodney who was still enroute to her home.  I asked him how much she was paying him and told him that I would pay him more if he took it to the dump.  (Yeah yeah, super petty, I know, but it felt like the right wrong thing to do.)  He was as angry as I was when I told him what happened.  He said he would send me his cash app, take it to the dump, and send me a photo. At that point, even if he double dipped and took money from both of us – I wanted to feel better.

 

About 20 minutes later, Rodney called me.  He said, “Giving that sofa to someone in need is your blessing to them.  Don’t let anyone change you.  Just give it to her.  Don’t let anyone take your blessings.”  I sat in my car and cried.  I believe God sends us all angels to remind us that there is kindness in the world – and to be a better person.  And we all need more of that – especially in these times.   He taught me today and I will remember it for years, I’m sure.  I felt like my mom was talking to me through him.  I could hear her in my head saying almost those exact words.  He was absolutely right and one of the kindest people I have met in a very, very long time.  If I was blessed that day, it was by meeting Rodney. 

Cut to half an hour later:  Rodney calls me back.  “You wouldn’t believe what (expletive) happened….”  Apparently, Spring has some issues.  And she also hadn’t measured the size of her doorway.  She shouted at Rodney that it was his fault, demanding he pay her back because “he” had made the mistake.  He left the sofa where it was in the hallway of her apartment building in front of her door.  He said, “We tried to bless her. Not everyone can accept blessings.”

So, I’m staying off FB marketplace.  I’ll call Rodney next time I have something to give away.  He has a warehouse of items that he blesses people with.  There are also companies like 1-800-JUNK that try to repurpose/donate/sell items.